Like a Pavement
by Stessa
Summary: And just like that, Edward and Jasper were gone. They'd become ashes and left their wives behind, having to handle life without them. It seems like life can't go on, but maybe each other is exactly what they need to pick up the pieces? AlicexBella.
1. Chapter One

**LIKE A PAVEMENT**

**Chapter One**

And just like that, her entire world had come crashing down.

Everything she had known and loved for centuries, all she had truly cared about, all she had wanted to have with her during her forever, all of that – it came crashing down in piles around her, building up this wall, this invisible thing that didn't seem to be possible to break down again. All she had worked for, wished for, hoped for, it came crashing down, and she had no idea how to handle it.

Alice had always thought that she was pretty much in control of the things happening in her life. Being able to see the future really was a plus-side in that aspect of life, and yet she hadn't seen this coming – at least not until it was too late. Her visions had tricked her before (the suicide incident with Bella was still spoken of, even so many years later), but it hadn't been fatal like this one had been. She should have known, shouldn't she? It was her fault that this had happened, and she felt so guilty about it, even in the midst of her own pain, she felt guilty towards everyone else – especially Bella, Esme and Renesmee, but what could she do?

She'd ruined it, and it was really too late.

She should probably have known that their luck was running out. They'd dealt with truly dangerous situations so many times in their family, and they could only have so much luck. But she hadn't thought about it; things had been going great for so long, and when their friends needed help, they helped them, just like it would be (and had been) the other way around.

Maybe she should have kept her thoughts to herself? Edward always used to tell her so. He always asked her, either nicely or rather harshly, to keep quiet. Some things were just better left unsaid. But... there were certain visions she had always told Carlisle about. He'd always wanted to know when danger was coming, when something life-altering was about to happen, something that could change their life. And therefore she had told him about her vision, knowing that he'd agree with her. If the Denali Coven was in trouble, then they'd help them. They were their friends, and they had been there for them on several occasions. And the brilliant part of it was that Alice saw they were in trouble, before it even happened, so it had been so easy to send Edward and Jasper off to help them in the other end of the country...

Or so she and Carlisle had thought.

Alice stared out of the wide window in her and Jasper's huge bedroom, her eyes scanning the tree tops and the dark sky above them. Her legs were tugged up close to her chest, her arms were wrapped around them, and in the little nook she had created between her knees, she was resting her chin. She couldn't get herself to smile as she stared outside; everything seemed so wrong right now, and this was all she could get herself to do. This house held so many memories for all of them, and even if those memories were meant to bring her comfort, all they did was pain her even more.

The pixie knew that if she had been able to cry, she would have been dry on the inside now, because all she did was heave in and out, gasp after air and rub her stinging eyes. But not a tear came out, it was impossible, and for once she really wished that she was human, for once she wanted to be able to do one of those simple and ordinary human-things – she wanted to cry. She wanted to feel sleek tears run down her rosy cheeks, she wanted to be able to feel pain when she closed her hands into tight fists and her nails dug into her skin – but she couldn't. She couldn't feel anything. She hated being numb like that, when she needed to feel the pain.

She breathed in a shaky breath; she had been doing that a lot lately, just to feel a bit more human. She had even forced herself to eat something, to drink something, but it didn't make her feel any better, not in the slightest. She had hoped it would, and her hopes were crushed again and again, when all she tried to do turned into failure. That was how she had felt lately – so far from her usual self – she had felt like a failure. She had let her entire family down, ruined what Carlisle had spent so long trying to create. And she felt guilty, more guilty than she had ever felt about anything in her entire existence.

She couldn't look any of them in the eye. She couldn't lock her gaze with Emmett's usually playful eyes, she couldn't look into Esme's pained pools, or Rosalie's troubled gaze. She couldn't bare to even look once at Bella, and her head was always bent when Carlisle came to try and talk to her. She couldn't bare it, couldn't handle it. It was too hard for her, too much for her.

Alice lifted her head from the comfortable position she had been sitting in for just about ten hours. Her hands unlocked their tight grips on the side of her legs and slid down, onto the windowsill. She stretched her legs then, one foot falling to the floor, the other to the end of the beautifully carved wood, pressing against the pale wall there. She let her head fall backwards and rested it against the wall behind her. Closing her eyes tightly, she started to remember it again, remember that day that seemed so long ago, where everything had been truly good. It pained her, every time she thought back to those days, it pained her, yet she still couldn't help it.

**-two months ago-**

"Alice?"

The pixie turned her head to the side when Emmett's childish and giddy voice interrupted her marathon of old _Project Runway_ episodes. She sometimes liked to watch it, even if the show ended what felt like a gazillion years ago, because she was reminded of what kind of clothes were in back then; one of the contestants always made something that reminded her of something she used to wear.

She paused the show and battered her eyelashes at him, "What is it Emmett?"

"Wanna play a game with me?" he questioned and fell from his toes to the balls of his feet like some innocent little kid. Alice knew he was nowhere near innocent though. The backwards cap and his grin would try to convince one otherwise, but she knew him better than that.

She arched an eyebrow at him, "I'm busy Emmett, why don't you go and annoy Bella instead?" she replied to him and turned back to her show. She un-paused it and immediately her attention was back on that. She rather enjoyed playing games with Emmett at times because it didn't take much to amuse him, but she was only watching this to pass time until Jasper got home. And it wasn't like Emmett desperately needed her to have fun. He had always loved to tease and make fun of Bella, and Alice loved to remind him of that, because he still hadn't gotten over the fact that Bella, once-upon-a-time, was stronger than him, when she was just a newborn.

"She's spending quality time with Edward." Emmett replied with a cheeky grin; his voice was strained as he held back a chuckle, undoubtedly quoting what Edward had said earlier before they had made their exit to 'spend some quality time' together. And Alice couldn't remember a time when Emmett hadn't teased Bella about her sex life – he'd done it since day one.

Alice bid back a chuckle; there was something about making fun of Edward that the two of them just loved to do together. She, because she knew she could, and he, because he simply loved making fun of everyone. "Why don't you do that with Rosalie then?" she suggested him, eyes still following everything on screen. She briefly wondered why she hadn't even heard Edward and Bella when they were together, because usually she would. It couldn't be missed. But she had probably been too absorbed in her show to notice anything, she could get like that at times, even if her senses were exceptional.

Emmett groaned, "She's being negative."

Alice scoffed. For some reason, that didn't surprise her. Rosalie did have a tendency of being negative at times, but she was wondering what it was now. She turned her eyes and gave Emmett a quick look, before Heidi Klum got her attention again, "What's it now?"

Emmett shrugged, "She said she doesn't wanna do it just because they are."

Alice was about to reply to that, to make a bit fun of her sister as well, because that was just a typical Rosalie thing to do, but she didn't get that far, because the beast had heard them.

"EMMETT!" she exclaimed from upstairs. Alice thought they had done their best at keeping their voices extremely low, but she must have heard them anyway.

Emmett made a shocked-face just for fun, "Oh, I've gotta jet, see ya' Allie-Callie."

And before she could manage to tell him not to call her that (which she often did – he never listened; for some reason he found it incredibly funny to get a rise out of her like that), he was out of there, rushing to stand by his wife's side. Alice was tempted to listen in for a second, but then decided not to while she chuckled to herself and turned the volume on the TV up slightly, still anticipating Jasper's return. He'd gone hunting a few days ago. He wanted to go somewhere away from their current house, and he usually preferred hunting alone. Alice didn't particularly like sending him off on his own, but she wasn't about to be overprotective (he always mocked her for being that way; just like she mocked him when he overprotected her) so she let him do whatever he pleased. She just missed him like crazy when he wasn't there.

He was like her other half or something stupidly corny like that. Ever since she met him, things had just been much better for her. She thought that maybe they were soul mates and meant to be together. It sounded cliché, but Jasper was everything that she needed. And that was why it was so hard when they were apart. They'd been apart before, and as soon as they saw each other again, she just felt this sort of relief everywhere in her body, and it wasn't because Jasper controlled her – it was all him, but it wasn't his gift. It was his presence.

She knew they weren't flaunting their relationship in everyone's face like Emmett and Rosalie always did. They weren't all over each other; their relationship was different in that aspect. Not that they didn't like doing the physical stuff, but they shared an understanding for each other that went even deeper than that. They had a certain connection and they needed each other in different ways than Rosalie needed Emmett and Bella needed Edward.

As the episode ended and the room got quiet, suddenly Alice could hear everything going on in the house around her. Bella and Edward weren't hard to miss in their bedroom, and she could hear the moving of papers, which would probably be Carlisle working in his office. Esme was very quiet, but if Alice listened really carefully, she was sure she could hear her body rubbing against the sheets of her bed and her fingers scraping against something hard; she was probably reading a book in the main bedroom. Emmett must have convinced Rosalie to spend some quality time together anyway, because they were even louder than Bella and Edward. And of course she couldn't hear Renesmee and Jacob anywhere – they'd been gone on their own for over a year now, seeing the world their way. They all missed them, but Alice understood why they wanted to spend some time together. And they'd be back eventually, there was no need to worry.

Alice thought that maybe she should go upstairs and wait in the bedroom she shared with Jasper; she had a feeling that he'd come home today, she had seen it this morning in a vision, so unless something had happened, he'd be there soon.

Speaking of visions... Just then another kicked in;

"_What are you doing here, Aro?" Carmen asked, her voice particularly edgy and harsh, even if she was standing in front of one of the most powerful vampires in the world. Aro had Renata close to him, as usual, and it seemed like they were almost as one, because her fingers seemed to be constantly glued to Aro's cloak, even if everybody knew she wasn't actually touching him. _

_Aro didn't speak, it was Marcus who replied, as he glanced at the two vampires in front of him; Carmen and Eleazar did not look that frightening, though he knew to be aware – he had known Eleazar for a long time, they'd worked together, and he shouldn't underestimate him. His special ability might not be very useful for him right now, but he was also smarter than most people. "News got all the way to Volterra about the newest member of your coven." he informed them both with a cocky smile._

_Eleazar stared at the six vampires in front of him – Aro and Renata, Marcus and Caius, and of course the faithful guards Jane and Alec – and tried not to let his fear show. He did not want to get into a fight with the Volturi, it wasn't his intention at all, but he was not going to let them get their way. They were going to try to pursue Maya (the newest addition to their vegetarian family) to join them in Volterra. News had gotten all the way to Italy about her outstanding special abilities. And she was still so young, she wouldn't know better than to join them. He couldn't let that happen, because they'd searched for years, trying to find themselves another member, and now they finally had one – they couldn't let Aro take her away from them. _

_Caius spoke then, "We want to talk to her, Eleazar." _

_He could feel his jaw tighten. It wouldn't just be talking, he could feel that; if they spoke to her, learned more about her – then they'd do anything to get her. It would come to a fight. "That's not possible at the moment." he replied to them then, trying to hold his voice steady, even if he was very nervous about the outcome of this conversation. _

_Aro took a step closer, Renata right behind him. Jane and Alec were ready to bounce if they were needed, Eleazar could see that. He glanced briefly at Carmen next to him, but she wasn't backing down either. "It wasn't an option." he replied to them in a throaty voice, glancing from Eleazar to Carmen and back to Eleazar again. _

_It was wrong what everybody always claimed, Eleazar knew that. The Volturi was supposedly only out to keep vampires a secret, all they did was for the good of their kind, that was what they claimed – but Eleazar didn't believe that. They wanted to be the most powerful ones. And the Denali Coven along with Carlisle's family, they'd soon be stronger than them, if they didn't do anything about it. And after they had found Maya, it was an ever bigger possibility, and maybe they were actually scared of what would happen if they didn't stop it in time. _

"_We're going to... need to see her." Marcus finished. _

"Alice?"

Alice snapped right out of it then. She could feel her eyes going wide as she tried to digest everything she had just seen. The Volturi were going to Alaska, they were going to visit the Denali Coven, and it did not look like it was a pleasant visit. They were in trouble – their friends were in trouble.

"What did you see, Alice?"

There was that voice again. She turned her head to the side and was immediately calmed as her eyes locked with Jasper's golden brown ones. She could feel his hand on her back, reassuringly placed there; he'd found her in the middle of her vision and done what he usually does – tried to be there for her.

Alice swallowed loudly, as her vision kept repeating itself inside her head, over and over again. She didn't even have time to be happy to see Jasper again, to greet him after so many days apart. She didn't know when the Volturi were going to leave for Alaska, but for all she knew they could have started their journey already. Or they might not even have heard about this new vampire yet, but was that really a risk she was willing to take? She had better get this cleared with Carlisle as quick as possible, she needed to hear what he thought about it.

They should help their fellow vegetarians, shouldn't they?

Jasper broke the eerie silence, "...Alice? Are you okay?"

She blinked at him quickly, before she shot out of her seat, her lithe legs carrying her across the marvel floors of their living room, "CARLISLE!" she hollered at him, just to let him know that she was coming and he better be ready to talk to her. She took the stair two steps at a time and turned down the long hallway; Carlisle's office was the last door, and she went right in without even knocking, she knew he was ready for her, there was no doubt about it.

Carlisle's had his hands folded as his elbows rested on the table and he gave her a curious smile, "Did you have a vision, Alice?"

The younger vampire closed the door safely behind her and crossed the floor, not embarrassed at all by the way she had hollered at him. She took a seat on the chair in front of him, and gave him a stiff nod, "I think that Eleazar and Carmen might be in trouble."

This seemed to catch Carlisle's attention – he had always wanted to take care of everyone that mattered to him, of everyone he considered family, and the Denali Coven was definitely like family to him. "What happened?" he questioned her in a calm voice.

Alice brushed a piece of her deep black hair away from her face and looked at him through her extremely long lashes, "Do you know if Eleazar is planning on adding any new members to their coven for some reason?" she asked him, her high pitched voice playing with the silence in the office, that always seemed to represent the calmness of Carlisle himself.

Carlisle gave her a sideways smile, not commenting on the fact that she asked a new question, in stead of answering him. He had always been patient, and Alice had always admired him for that. It was a personality trait she had never managed to master. "As a matter of fact, yes." Carlisle informed her, letting his hands gently fall to the table, as he leaned back in his office chair, "They've recently added a young vampire named Maya. Eleazar changed her himself."

Alice raised an eyebrow and felt her body stiffen just a bit. Of course it wasn't even sure that all of this would happen, but it was hard to be optimistic with the vision she had just had. But there was a possibility that maybe the Volturi were just going to Alaska to make sure that there weren't any newborns going crazy or something.

"You seem tense." Carlisle observed.

Alice offered Carlisle the greatest smile she could muster at the moment, "The Volturi are interested in her." she told him in a quick voice, as the need to share her vision with him became tougher to fight, "I think it might end in a fight."

Carlisle seemed more than surprised to hear this. The little one could watch as his face changed from interest to surprise to confusion and into concern. "Are you sure about this?" he asked her then, not that he would ever need to. She had told him what she saw, and of course it wasn't completely sure that this was going to happen, but it almost always did.

She didn't answer him, and Carlisle didn't seem to mind.

"Some of us have to go to Alaska and warn them." Carlisle told her while he duck into one of his drawers, searching for something Alice didn't know what was, "If we're dealing with a newborn, I think we should send Jasper." he stopped and looked up at her, their eyes locking in a firm glare.

Alice didn't particularly like the sound of sending Jasper off to Alaska on his own. She had just gotten him back today (they hadn't even really spent time together yet), and he was going to have to leave as soon as possible. But she knew not to argue against what Carlisle thought was best, and besides – the Denali Coven needed them, and they were family. The Cullens helped family. "I don't think he should go alone. I could go with him."

Carlisle paused and looked at her again, his golden eyes full of affection for her – and recognition for what she wanted to do. He sat up straight and closed the drawer he had been dealing with and placed a folded map on his desk. "I know you want to go with him, but I think either Emmett or Edward should join him." he replied to her, and again, Alice didn't object.

"Edward should go. Aro has always had this thing for him." Alice said then, knowing it would be hard to see Bella sulk around for days in worry of what would happen, but that was just the way it had to be. Plus, if they sent Emmett, they'd have to deal with Rosalie, and that would be even worse.

Carlisle gave her a short nod, and Alice knew that she was supposed to leave now. Carlisle had some things he needed to sort out before their family meeting later. Alice knew they were going to have one, because all of this would be needed to be explained so they could figure out what to do exactly. And Carlisle would need to plan a bit more with Jasper and Edward.

The pixie closed the door behind her as a great sense of relief filled her body. She felt much better now when she had told Carlisle about her vision. He always knew what to do, so it was the smartest thing to do, to let him know. She felt a new smile overtake her face as she skipped down the hallway with a grace that anyone would envy her.

If Jasper was going to leave soon, she was going to have to savour every moment with him until then. It was going to be hard to be without him for a while, but at least she could look forward to when he'd arrive back home again.

**-now-**

Alice felt the familiar pressure in her chest as the need to cry overtook her small and fragile frame. She felt weaker than she wanted to, than she had ever experienced before in her entire existence, and she didn't like it. The need to cry was horrible for anyone, crying made even humans feel weak, but this was even worse – having the need to cry and then not being able to made her feel weaker than she'd ever experienced before. Plus, the lack of hunting trips were taking its toll on her body as well – she couldn't even remember when was the last time she'd left her room.

She could remember how happy she had been that day – she'd been positive that everything was going to work out wonderfully for them; after all, that was her usual view on things. She couldn't be bothered to be negative, she couldn't be bothered to sulk. It was far better to put a happy spin on things and make the best of it.

She heaved out again, and it pained her to remember the last time she had actually been optimistic. She'd always believed that that was a big part of her personality, but since that horrible afternoon when Tanya had showed up on their doorstep, Alice hadn't been herself. She knew it too. No matter what everyone did or said, how everyone tried to cheer her up the slightest, she just couldn't put a positive spin on things now. Everything was wrong, so why even bother to try?

Even Esme, while dealing with her own pain, had tried to comfort her, tried to help her and soothe her pain. But even with her mother's arms around her, Alice hadn't been able to put a smile back onto her face.

Somewhere in the middle of her misery, they'd packed all of their things together and went back to Forks, to a completely furnished house, exactly like they had left it the last time they had lived there. Bella hadn't wanted to go back, she'd tried to object, but Carlisle meant it was the best thing for them at the moment. He said that that house held more memories than any other place they'd lived, but Alice knew he was doing it for her. This was the place that held the best memories for her, though for Bella it was going to be tougher – this was the place she first lived with Edward, the place where she learned to love them all. It was going to be hard for her, but Alice appreciated going back here; this place reminded her so much of Jasper.

And even though Carlisle had meant it as comfort for her, all she could do was wallow even more, pain shooting through every bone of her body. But she still didn't want to move out of her spot, out of her bedroom – this was their place. Her and Jasper's, and she couldn't count the times they'd been seated together in this exact windowsill, arms wrapped around each other, staring at nothing throughout the night, watching from the sun set, to the moon appeared, and to it went down again and a new day ceased. It was the way things worked, and the two of them had watched the wonders countless of times.

There was a knock on her bedroom door; it was soft yet demanding and Alice opened up her eyes and turned her head to the side, her pixie eyes focused on the wooden door in the other side of the room. "Come in." she mumbled, and it wouldn't have been audible to human ears, but she knew that whoever was on the other side of the door, would hear her clearly.

The door creaked open and Alice was met by a mess of long blonde hair. It was Rosalie. She crept into the room in an elegant way, closing the door softly behind her. She quickly moved across the room, her feet barely touching the floor, and a second later she was sitting by Alice's foot, at the other end of the windowsill.

Alice didn't know what to say to her. She knew that Rosalie was pained very much by the fact that Jasper wasn't there with them now; they had always had a very special brother/sister bond, and though Edward had irritated her from the beginning with everything he did, she was missing him too – all of them were.

"Esme and I are going hunting." Rosalie informed her, as her beautifully featured face turned slightly to the side, her cheekbones held high, and her slightly fading golden eyes pierced Alice to the spot. The purple bruises beneath her eyes seemed to stand out more than usual, but Alice didn't say anything.

"I know." the pixie-like vampire replied, daring to let her eyes to the window instead of staying on her sister. Rosalie preferred to be looked at (especially when one spoke to her), but Alice simply didn't have what it took anymore. Everyone in her family reminded her of what she used to have, and it only pained her.

Rosalie breathed in deeply, "You know?" she questioned then, the words rolling off her tongue in a quick manner, but Alice caught every word.

She nodded, "Everything still works, Rosalie. I can still have visions." she replied to the beautiful vampire, her eyes still set on the trees in their backyard, "In fact -" she paused quickly, "-they seem to occur more often now as I can't seem to pinpoint my future – or Bella's. They keep changing."

Rosalie was quiet for a very long time, apparently not knowing what to say. She had never been good at these kind of situations, she often ended up saying the wrong things, Alice knew that, but she would have appreciated it if she'd given it a try. "Esme just wanted to know if you'd like to join us. Hunting." she said instead, because apparently it was easier to talk about this than any other things Alice might want to discuss.

Finally she turned to look at her, their eyes meeting in a locked gaze. Alice knew that she ought to join them, it'd do her good to get something down her throat. She'd never been thirstier in her life, yet she still didn't feel the urge to go out there with them. Not like this. "I think I'm just going to stay here." she told the other vampire, her soft bell-like voice fading into nothing as she turned her head again, indicating that the conversation was over.

Rosalie usually didn't obey to what other people thought, but lately she hadn't known how to act around her, Alice knew that. Though they hadn't always gotten along, they were like real sisters, and Alice knew that it was worrying Rosalie to see her like this. Because – to Rosalie – family mattered as well.

"Well, the offer was there." she softly said, before she left the room again, quicker than she entered it, probably just wanting to get out of there. Alice heard her door close and tuned out of the real world again. She couldn't bare to listen in, to hear Rosalie tell Esme that she wasn't joining them. She couldn't bare to hear Esme's worried tone and the sadness that was hidden with each word she spoke. She was hurting so much, too. Edward had been her first, and he'd always be more special than the rest of them.

Alice thought back to that day again – the last day she had been happy. The last day that all of them had been truly happy. Before Carlisle's family had been torn apart, before Esme had lost two of her children. It was that day, so long ago, where Tanya had showed up on their doorstep, and ruined everything.

**-five weeks ago-**

Alice was tripping her foot, following the nice beat of the swing music bursting through the room in their huge dance-like ball room. Emmett and Rosalie were flowing through the room, moving to the beat in the fastest manner possible, Rosalie's skirt bouncing around her knees as they extended their legs in every possible direction, following the music with smiles of joy across their faces.

Watching them do this together, Alice really couldn't wait until Jasper and Edward came back again. She and Jasper used to dance like this too, they'd blend in with Rosalie and Emmett on the floor like it was meant to be and perfectly planned out, and everything else would fade away. They'd always loved their swing music the best, and the song that Emmett and Rosalie were currently swinging to was the Cherry Poppin' Daddies' _Zoot Suit Riot – _one of their absolute favourites.

She let her eyes follow her two siblings as they moved faster and faster, becoming one with each other and one with the music. Even her trained eyes had troubles following their every move, as they blended together, a mess of colours, Rosalie's hair blowing around them like a very big and very outstanding halo.

Alice turned her head to the side when she saw Bella enter the room with a curious smile. She and Edward had never really joined the others as they danced like this. Edward sometimes took Esme for a swing, but Bella was just not a dancer. She said she'd never danced before, and she wasn't about to do so. Even if Alice had done everything to try and convince her otherwise.

The beautiful brunette crossed the floor quickly, as if not to crash with the dancers, and sat down next to Alice by the side, still that sideways smile across her face. "You miss dancing, huh."

Alice knew that her eyes were shiny with joy and that the smile on her face was huger than normal, but she couldn't help herself – what she wouldn't do to be on the floor right now with Jasper. "It's the best." she replied and started humming along to the music in her bell-like voice.

Bella chuckled next to her, "I love it when you do that – it's always two or three octaves higher than the actual music."

Alice blinked at her, but didn't stop. She was just happy that it amused her best friend. She knew that Bella was missing Edward terribly like she was missing Jasper. They deserved all the amusement they could get.

"I still remember the school dance." Bella reminisced and Alice stopped humming then, listening closely to her as she spoke, "You four were tearing the dance floor apart. It was so spectacular."

Alice bit her lip as a devious idea entered her mind, "You can dance like that."

Bella shook her head, immediately hostile. "I could never dance like that, I'm too clumsy."

Alice grinned at her, "Not so much anymore. You'd do great, Bella." she reassured her – after all, it wasn't hard for _her_ to know.

Bella shook her head to herself as the music came to a halt and Emmett and Rosalie stopped in front of them, the joy written across their faces. No one could tell that they'd just danced for two hours straight. It was incredible what being a vampire did to one's personal abilities like that.

Alice stood up from her seat then and pulled Bella with her, the other vampire yelping in surprise. "Rosalie will play the piano for us." Alice told her then, and letting go of Bella's hand, she moved over and placed an arm around Emmett's body. She looked upwards then; their height difference always kicked in whenever they were standing next to each other, "And you'll let us females have some fun, won't you, Emmett?"

Emmett could be pretty clueless at times, but he knew when to make his exit. Alice's request along with Rosalie's firm glare was enough to tell him that he shouldn't object. He fled the room within a second and Alice reached for Bella's hands again and pulled her close, while Rosalie took a seat by the piano and started running her sleek fingers across the keys.

"We're not doing this, Alice." Bella told her, but didn't resist as Alice pulled her into the middle of the dance floor.

She swept a piece of her black hair behind her ear and giggled like only Alice could, "You can dance Bella, you've got no idea what you're capable of." she told her, and with a firm grip on her, she led the way through the first few steps to an ordinary slow dance. It was always good to start out easy.

Bella was stiff in front of her, and Alice could tell that she felt awkward and stupid, but she was not backing out of this one. Like she'd made it her task all those years ago to get Bella to dress better, this was now her new task – to get Bella to dance.

As Rosalie's fingers went into overdrive and the supposedly slow music turned faster, she and Bella moved with it, Bella quite clumsily as she tried to follow Alice's every step along the way. They moved, turned, stepped and swung around, but suddenly Bella's foot got in the way, and they both fell to the floor with an enormous clonk.

Rosalie seemed quite amused as the music stopped and she chuckled to herself, and Alice bid back her giggle as she rolled off of Bella, to lie next to her on the floor. Bella hid her face with both hands a let out a loud groan.

"See!" she whined while she turned her head and dropped her hands to look Alice in the eye, "I can't dance."

Alice smiled warmly at her, "You were doing great Bella – a couple more of these lessons, and you and Edward can dance with us."

Bella shook her head in disbelief and the sudden silence in the room startled the three sisters when they could suddenly hear everything in their huge house. And something was happening downstairs.

All three of them rushed to get downstairs; Rosalie was quickest, after all, she hadn't been lying on the floor, but Bella and Alice were right behind her. They descented the staircase and turned to the living room where Esme was curled into Carlisle's arms, her chest heaving up and down as if she should be crying.

Alice could immediately tell that something was very wrong, because Emmett was sitting in one of the chairs, a truly shocked expression on his face, and across from Carlisle – there was Tanya. She was from the Denali Coven, she was _there_. And yet... yet Jasper and Edward weren't anywhere in sight.

Rosalie rushed to Emmett's side and as Alice took a step forward, her eyes met Carlisle's. "Tanya's here with some bad news, Alice." he told her, his voice choking over, as he did his best to console Esme, who wasn't saying anything. "Bella," he continued with a voice that wasn't as calm as they were all used to, his golden eyes moving to Bella, who was at Alice's side, "you both might want to sit down."

Alice couldn't move out of the spot, she couldn't move to sit down. All she could do, as every possible scenario went through her head, as all the visions she'd had in the past month skipped through her brain, she tried to analyse them, see if there was something she'd missed, something she had misread, but she got nothing.

She could feel Bella's hand slip into hers while both of them turned to face Tanya, who sat there, a truly crushed expression across her beautiful face. "It's... It's Edward and Jasper," she whispered, her voice low and pained, "they're... they're gone."

**-now- **

Alice closed her eyes again and clonked her forehead to the window with as much force as she knew it could take without breaking. She couldn't believe that she was remembering this day over and over. She couldn't believe that she kept thinking about that day, that day where she had been so happy, fooling around with Bella while tragedy had already hit the both of them.

She couldn't believe that that day – that that day that had seemed so bright and wonderful there on the dance floor – that that day had ruined the rest of her existence.

Edward and Jasper were no more. They were just a huge pile of ashes.

* * *

_I cannot believe that I decided to 'kill' off Jasper and Edward. I love Jasper, he's so perfect with Alice, and I hate that I had to do this. But you know – if I want Alice and Bella, it's going to be done the hard way ;) No romance without a few bumps in the road. The rest of the Cullens will be in here quite frequently, and it's almost certain that Renesmee and Jacob will make an appearance (or two or three) as well. _

_After posting my first Twilight fiction, my oneshot 'One, Two, Three', I decided to go with this idea I've had for a while too, because everyone seemed to be really positive about the oneshot; the feedback was amazing. I hope that this is going to be as wonderful to write as that one, and it's already better, because it has multiple chapters and a lot more to work on._

_I tried to get everyone as much in character as possible, but as I've said before, it's hard to write Alice in an angst fic like this. Especially when she's all depressed. I hope I did okay though. _

_Please leave me a comment and tell me what you thought of this. If you'd like to read more and all that :b I won't update for a while, because I'm leaving for Paris on Tuesday, and when I get back, school will soon start and it'll be harder to get some writing done. So a few weeks might pass before the next chapter is posted. I hope that's okay. _

_**Disclaimer; **I do not own Twilight, and I don't own Cherry Poppin' Daddies' 'Zoot Suit Riot' either. _


	2. Chapter Two

**Chapter Two **

A soft knock could be heard on her bedroom door, but Alice didn't want to answer it.

Whoever was on the other side – that person could wait. She was trapped in a wonderful memory right now, mesmerised by Jasper's devoted eyes that spoke volumes to her, even through reminiscing. The way he looked at her in this memory, it was the way he had always looked at her, since the first time they met. She had known since she saw him in her vision that she loved him more than anything, and it hadn't taken him long to love her like that either.

Love was weird like that. Alice had always found it tricky yet outstanding. She thought that it was weird how she could love someone before she even met them. For 'regular' people (and certainly most vampires as well) love wasn't something seen in a vision. They experienced it in a regular fashion; met someone, liked that someone, and fell in love, then spent their forever together. But it had never been like that for Alice. She always knew that she loved someone before she even talked to the person – she'd see them in a vision, and everything would be clear to her.

She'd seen Jasper and travelled miles to be with him. She'd seen Carlisle, Esme, Edward, Rosalie and Emmett, and Jasper had joined her to find their future family. She'd seen Bella and repeatedly told Edward that she loved her and that Bella was going to love her too. She'd loved them all since she first laid eyes upon them, and that was all a very long time ago. She'd loved them for decades and the love was still stronger than anything else she felt... even through her grief.

Another knock was heard, a bit louder this time, and Alice held her breath, hoping that the certain someone on the other side of the door would leave her alone. She couldn't get herself out of her room, not today, it required too much control, which she didn't have at the moment.

Whoever it was didn't seem to agree on her view on things, though. There was another knock, and this time it wasn't just one – another knock followed, and then another one and another one, aiming for driving Alice completely insane in approximately thirty seconds.

Without the need to consider again who'd be at the other side of the door, Alice pulled back her lips in a hiss, "Get lost, Rosalie!"

The door creaked open and Rosalie's head poked inside, a curious look across her beautifully shaped face. Alice swore that she was looking happier and happier every day that skipped pass them. She thought that she – gradually – was getting better, and for a moment she wondered why that wasn't her, before Rosalie spoke again, "A vision?" she chipped, wanting to know how Alice had known it'd be her before she even opened the door.

Alice zoomed in on her, "I don't need visions to tell when you're knocking. You're the only one impatient enough to keep knocking, even when you know I don't want you in here." she paused, but Rosalie didn't even flinch, so with another hiss, the pixie continued, "And you're the only one in this house who'd enter a room regardless of you being wanted in there or not."

Rosalie still didn't flinch, she pushed the door fully open and entered the room again; she was dressed for an outing, even fancier than usual, and the purple bruises beneath her eyes were almost invisible. She stood there then, her posture straight, hands on hips, and her long golden locks framing her face; Alice swore again that she was looking better since the last time she saw her. "We thought that today was a perfect day to go shopping! It's very cloudy in Port Angeles – we just wanted to know if you wanted join us."

Alice stared blankly at her. _Shopping?_ she questioned herself with disbelief. How could they think about shopping at a time like this? Why did they even need to shop? They all had good clothes! It was pointless.

Rosalie arched an eyebrow, impatiently tapping her foot as she awaited an answer. "Well?" she sneered, a forced smiled perked across her face.

Alice bit down on her lip and turned her head towards the window again, not wanting to talk more with her sister. What was the point anyway? She would just try to convince her to come, and it'd be pointless. Alice didn't want to shop. She didn't want to do anything.

"I can't fucking believe you!" Rosalie snarled at her, just loud enough for Alice to hear (the blonde vampire probably didn't want Esme to hear this, if she was going to use curse words). She took a step closer, her hands still glued to her hips, "You used to love shopping! Where did your personality go? Did it just disappear or something!?"

Alice blinked once, but didn't turn to look at her. It was true, though. She used to love shopping. She used to never wear the same outfit twice, and yet she had been in these sweats since they arrived back to Forks. It was a long time ago – the longest she had ever worn anything in her life. But she didn't care anymore. What was the point when she didn't have to look nice for anyone anymore? There _was_ no point. So why bother?

She didn't want to bother. And she didn't want to go shopping with them when – clearly – it was just to get her out of the house. Heck, she didn't even know who 'they' were.

Rosalie stepped even closer, stopped right in front of the familiar windowsill where Alice had been seated for weeks now. That was the only positive thing about being a vampire for her as things were at the moment. She could stay in the same position for days and it wouldn't be a problem. Rosalie placed a gentle, but unsure hand, on her knee and this caused Alice to turn her head – quite frankly – in surprise, "Answer me, Alice." she demanded, but her voice wasn't harsh; it didn't sound particularly demanding, it sounded kind, and so very unlike Rosalie, "Please come with us shopping. _Do_."

Their eyes locked and Alice could tell that her sister sincerely wanted her to come; that it meant a lot to her. She wanted to be able to say yes and tag along, but for some reason – Alice sighed at this thought – she couldn't get herself to. She couldn't get herself to do anything anymore. She hoped that it'd somehow be different down the road, but right now everything seemed pointless to her.

"It'd mean a lot to Nessie if you tagged along." Rosalie begged her, and suddenly Alice knew why she had been happier lately; Renesmee and Jacob had come. Of course Jacob wasn't really on Rosalie's good side, but when Renesmee was there, she was always happier.

Alice scolded. She hadn't even known that Renesmee and Jacob had showed up. She thought she smelled something different a while ago, but she hadn't really been able to trust herself with anything since that day, so she hadn't really thought much about it. But now when she did – of course the familiar smell of blood should have been picked up on, and of course she really shouldn't have missed the way Jacob practically reeked all over the house.

She let out a deep sigh, "When did Nessie and Jacob show up?" she wanted to know, deliberately avoiding answering her request to go shopping with them.

Rosalie wrinkled her adorable nose, "Nessie and... the _dog_," she still had troubles referring to Jacob by using his name, even so many years after he'd joined their family, and so she almost always called him something else, "...arrived a couple of days ago. It took some time for them to get here, but they did it as fast as possible. Bella was very relieved to have her back."

Alice could imagine how much it meant to Bella to have her daughter with her during this time. It gave her somewhat of a reason to stay more positive and try to move on. Plus, when Renesmee was there – Bella really had to focus on helping her dealing with the loss of her father. "That's... nice." Alice replied to her, not sure exactly what she was expected to say.

Rosalie looked at her for a few seconds, clearly not happy with the way she was responding to their suggestion of shopping. They'd probably hoped that maybe _that _would cheer her up – since nothing else seemed to work. Alice was sorry to let them down once again. "So you don't wanna join us?" she tried again.

Alice shook her head, and Rosalie probably didn't want to try more, because she shrugged helplessly and turned to leave the room. She didn't close the door completely, but Alice didn't have the strength to get up and close it herself. She heard her sister quickly descent the stairs and stop in the hall downstairs.

"Any luck?" she heard Renesmee ask, her voice hopeful.

Rosalie's tone was bitter when she spoke, "No."

There was a short silence, and Alice was sure that maybe they'd drop the trip all together; if it was all planned to cheer her up, why bother to go through with it? But she was surprised when she heard Bella speak, "Well, we probably shouldn't leave her all alone – I'll stay."

Alice furrowed her brow. All alone? Where had the boys gone at? Had she been so in her own head that she'd completely missed her visions?

Now Esme spoke, "Are you sure, Bella? Alice can handle herself."

"I really don't mind." Bella was quick to reply, and before anything else was said or done, Rosalie had overruled them all and said that that was that, and the three women were leaving, and suddenly Alice could only hear the comforting breathing of Bella downstairs.

It was weird sitting like this – she had been so in her own head lately; reminiscing, thinking about the past and what would happen in the future; she'd gazed into their backyard for hours straight, hadn't really heard what was going on around her at all.

Jacob and Renesmee had showed up. Esme actually seemed to be getting better. The boys had left to go hunting at some point, and God only knew where Jacob had gone off to – she'd completely missed all these things, and suddenly she and Bella were alone in the house, and the urge to talk to her – to actually speak to her, for it had been months since they'd looked each other in the eye – was so huge, Alice almost couldn't believe it.

That urge – where had that been before? Had it just completely left her, the want to interact with other people? Had it just disappeared? Apparently she hadn't noticed how alone she had been, and suddenly it was much more clear to her. She had been alone a lot, hadn't she? She hadn't really felt that alone because she had spent time inside her head with Jasper, thinking about happier days, and she hadn't felt that that was wrong. But perhaps it was... she shouldn't have brushed Rosalie off every time she came to talk to her. She shouldn't have told Esme that she was fine and wanted to be alone when she knew that her mother was only there to make sure that she was alright.

Alice breathed in deeply and listened carefully. Bella was still standing downstairs, and as far as Alice could tell, she hadn't moved out of the spot. Alice glanced out of the window again, her eyes tracing the outlines of the trees and to the sky – she could leave this behind for just a second, couldn't she? She could talk to Bella. She _should_ talk to Bella.

The lithe vampire tryingly placed a foot on the floor, gracefully turning in the windowsill. She glanced towards the open door again, and decided that she better do this. She placed her other foot on the floor again, and pushed herself out of the familiar position she'd been sitting in for so long, and when she straightened up, she was happy to feel that she didn't even need to shake it off; she felt just as functional as usual.

She crossed the floor as quietly as possible, almost floating above the wood. She pushed her body through the door without it moving an inch, and continued down the hallway, stopping briefly in front of the staircase that led to the other floor. She leaned slightly forward, supported by the railing, and curiously peeked downstairs. She could see Bella still standing there; she was frozen in place, and Alice did a double-take when she saw what Bella looked like.

It had been some time since she'd actually seen her, so when she thought about the other vampire, it was an older image, a memory, and it was so scary to see how much a person can change. Her long brown hair was pulled back in a messy bun; she was wearing sweats pretty much like Alice herself and she looked so beat.

It was hard to believe that she should have gone shopping with the rest of the females in their family. To Alice, it seemed like, she wasn't ready for anything like that.

Alice fell back onto the balls of her heels and considered everything for a few seconds. She had thought about how Bella was feeling, she had, but she hadn't thought _that much_ about it. She'd felt guilty, felt like it was her fault that Edward wasn't there, but she hadn't really stopped and taken the time to wonder how Bella was holding up. Naturally, she was crushed like herself, Alice knew that, but she hadn't even spoken to her... maybe Bella was just as broken as she?

Alice swallowed a none-existent lump in her throat and took the first steps down the stairs in a very long time. She moved quickly, but still rather slowly for a vampire; she didn't skip like she usually would, but she moved, and that was good enough. She kept watching Bella's back as the floor came closer, and was almost sure that she wouldn't hear her – too absorbed in her own world – but when she reached the final step of the staircase, the other vampire turned and Alice was met by a pair of huge, brown eyes.

Bella seemed absolutely surprised to see her there. She blinked a few times, her long lashes caressing the purple skin beneath her eyes. Her mouth formed to a perfect 'O', and before Alice knew what she had done, or could stop to think about it, she had swept across the floor and crushed her arms around Bella's thin frame. She pressed her face into the comfort of Bella's embrace, and Bella tightened her grip around her, hugging her close as well, as if this had been planned, and not just a spur of the moment.

Alice couldn't explain it, but it was like she had really needed this. She might have missed Bella, she wasn't entirely sure, but standing in the middle of their huge silent house like this, hugging her tight, it was the happiest she had been in a very long time. She felt better than she had done when she was thinking about those happy days, because they were exactly that – thoughts; memories from a long time ago... but this, this was real, this was now, and Bella was there.

And perhaps Bella needed her at the moment, just as much as she needed her.

"I'm sorry." Alice mumbled into the warmth of Bella's sweatshirt, not once looking up at her.

She felt Bella brush her hair gently, "It's not your fault." she whispered back, her voice low and completely sincere. She knew, instantly, what Alice was apologising about, some sort of a quiet understanding, and though Alice felt guilty, like it was all her fault that they were both widows, it was nice to hear it from across her lips; hear that she didn't blame her.

Alice snuggled her face even closer to her best friend, and so there they stood; rocking gently from side to side in each other's embrace. "I've forgotten what it feels like to be hugged." she stated after a few seconds, her bell-like voice carrying itself through the thick fabric of Bella's shirt, still loud and clear.

"I told them you wouldn't want to go." Bella told her, as they pulled slightly back, staring at each other, their hands still laced together. "I said to Rose that she shouldn't bother to ask you, I could tell you haven't wanted to do that much lately."

"I didn't want to go, Bella." Alice stated, as her eyes traced every inch of Bella's beautiful face, "But you should have gone."

Bella shrugged, "I didn't really want to either. I've been... focused on Nessie." she sighed and blinked a few times. Alice knew that Bella didn't mind to focus on Renesmee, but that it also had to be hard for her when she was still missing Edward terribly herself, "I needed some time alone."

Immediately Alice felt like she was in the way of her wishes, "Oh …" the small one mumbled and let her hands fall from Bella's, "Am I getting in the way? I can go upstairs again." she said, quickly stepping backwards.

Bella shook her head lovingly and grabbed Alice's right hand again, "No." she firmly said, and then she pulled the other woman with her into the living room and sat them both onto the couch. Alice followed her, in some way relieved that she didn't want her to leave, because now that she had actually left her bedroom, she wasn't sure if it was a good idea to go back up so quickly.

Alice glanced at Bella again, and this time she couldn't help but voice her opinions. Bella surely looked horrible, but there was something about her... something Alice couldn't exactly pin-point, but it seemed to her that maybe Bella was actually handling this, was dealing with it; had moved pass the stage of complete hopelessness and was actually trying to control her life. "You look a lot better than me." she observed, again scanning Bella's clothes which – as she had seen before – were truly horrible, and to Bella's face, which wasn't that horrible at all, to be honest. She looked healthy; as healthy as a vampire could be. Her eyes were golden, which meant that she had eaten. Alice knew that her own ones were completely black by now, but that was an entirely different matter.

A small smile forced its way onto Bella's face; it was there, Alice saw it. The corners of her lips went up slightly and a low, almost none-existent chuckle escaped her mouth as well, "I've been trying lately. After Nessie and Jacob got back."

That made sense to Alice. Of course she would want to try and seem in control when her daughter was there. The pixie nodded shortly and glanced around the room again; nothing had changed since they arrived, nobody wanted to do anything it seemed. The few things they had brought with them were placed onto their new spots and it seemed like they had been there for years. As far as Alice knew, Carlisle had gotten a job at the hospital, but she didn't really know what any of the others had been up to. She hadn't given it a single thought, but now – when she was sitting in front of Bella – suddenly a lot of questions wanted to be answered.

And now seemed like the perfect time.

"Have you gone to school?" she quickly asked her best friend, the question slipping across her lips with speed and hurry.

Bella blinked a few times and then nodded her head, silently.

Alice breathed out deeply, "What grades are we in?" she then wanted to know.

"Rose and Emmett signed up as seniors." Bella whispered, her voice strained, sounding almost broken and hoarse, "You and I are signed up as sophomores. Now so's Renesmee. She looks so much like me, Carlisle said we should go as twins." Bella continued to explain, "Jacob's signed up as a junior, but I don't know if he'll go to school in the reservation."

Alice felt her eyes go wide, "He still has relatives there?"

"Can you believe it?" Bella said, sounding stunned herself. So many years had gone since Billy Black died and yet there was still family left that he had gone to visit. Alice wouldn't blame him if he'd want to spend some time with them now that he was back.

Alice shook her head as silence overtook the two of them again. It was almost weird; those few minutes they had talked about school and the others, she hadn't really thought about Jasper. It was a nice change, just for a few minutes. Because she didn't want to stop thinking about him, she wanted to always have him on her mind, to remember him every day. But she felt better now, knowing that she could actually talk about something else. She should do that more often.

Bella broke the silence again, "They're all wondering when you'll come to school with us. Our teachers keep asking about you."

Alice blinked. Oh that's right. She'd have to go to school sometime. That's... that's... _weird_. She hadn't really thought about school, and if she had, it had been the others at school. But of course she had to go as well. She just wasn't sure if she was ready to go to school without Jasper. He was usually the bright thing about her day. They didn't have classes together since he'd always signed up as a different age, but in the breaks they'd always be together, and it was such a nice relief for her. She wasn't certain if she could handle all those ordinary things without him by her side.

Bella glanced at her again, and her grip tightened around her hand, "You should eat something soon."

Alice couldn't believe her sometimes. She was always so concerned about others, she always made sure that everyone else was alright, even if she wasn't herself. But that was Bella. She was such a selfless person. "I'm not... I'm not in the mood for hunting." Alice said then, not daring to look into Bella's eyes.

"You feel so weak to me."

Alice didn't want to comment further on her observation, because she knew it was true – she could feel it too sometimes, when she did try to do anything. She could feel that she didn't have her usual strength, and sometimes she'd feel very light-headed.

"Alice."

She looked up, and their eyes locked again, "I'll go hunting soon. I promise." she whispered, her light voice dancing across her lips in a promise she wasn't sure she was going to keep just right away.

Bella squeezed her eyes together, but didn't say anything.

"How's the others?" Alice asked then, to get Bella to talk about something else, mainly so she wouldn't continue to pursue her to go hunt, but also so the silence wouldn't overtake them, and she'd be forced to talk about Jasper and Edward (because she knew it was coming – they had to talk to each other about it sometime).

Bella closed her eyes for a second, clearly thinking everything over quickly, "Esme's holding up." she said, opening her eyes again, nodding her head a bit, "Surprisingly, she's really good. I think she'd rather not think about it. But she goes out alone a lot – I think she needs it. Emmett's trying to be himself, but since no one's in the mood to play, he's sulking around a lot. He'd like to kick someone's ass in a fight soon, I think."

Alice nodded as she listened to Bella talk. She could picture all these things. She knew the others would be crushed as well, Jasper and Edward were their family too, but she also knew that no one would be as broken about it as she and Bella. She'd mostly been thinking about herself and how to deal with the loss of Jasper, but of course everyone else was missing him terribly too.

"Rosalie doesn't even play the piano anymore. I wonder when she'll find the urge to do so." Bella continued, her voice a low whisper, "It's the same with her car. She hasn't touched it once, it's really starting to worry Emmett. And Carlisle? Well, we almost don't see him, it's work, work, work, but he seems to handle everything that way. Nessie is so crushed, and Jacob doesn't know what to do or say."

Bella stopped her short speech and glanced at Alice again, her eyes big.

Alice squeezed her own eyes together instead as everything came crashing on to her yet again. She hated to hear about how her family was handling this, she hated to be reminded of the fact that this could have been avoided, had she not dragged them into this. She hated to feel like it was all her fault, and it completely sucked. She could feel a knot tighten in her stomach again, and the need to cry overtook her as usual.

But she wasn't going to sulk this time. She was going to hold back, and she was going to continue this conversation with Bella, because it actually seemed like the other vampire was glad that they were sitting across from each other, finally discussing things.

Alice breathed in deeply, mentally willing the knot in her stomach to untie itself. She breathed again and again, tried to calm herself, to stop her body from shaking like it usually would with her dry sobs. Her throat tightened dangerously and her tongue seemed to be in the way, but she clenched her fists and told herself she'd get gracefully through it.

She felt a cold hand on her thigh and opened her eyes to meet Bella's. The brunette was smiling at her, smiling in a comforting way. It was by no means a happy smile, but it was there, only to help her. "It's okay." she whispered, her voice caring as usual.

Alice shook her head angrily and bit her lip, "It's not fucking okay, Bella!" she hissed, staring up at her best friend with a stiff look in her eyes, "I can't believe this is happening to me – to us! I can't stand the fact that he's not coming back home through the doors after another hunting trip, I can't bare to think that he's never going to hug me again, and hold me in his arms, Bella... I can't-" she stopped and blinked rapidly, not trusting herself to say anything for a few seconds, in case she'd say the wrong thing, "I can't bare it... I just want him back, okay? I just want him back."

Bella stared at her in defeat, "Don't you think I'd like to have Edward with me here now as well? I'd kill to have him here, but truth is... he's _not_." she reached for Alice's hand again and squeezed her fingers tight, "It's not fair that they're not here. It's not. But we've gotta get through it Alice, we've got to. I'm starting to try, and you have to too."

Alice didn't respond to that. She knew it was true what Bella was saying – they had to get through it somehow, even if it didn't seem worth doing anything without Jasper there, everything seemed hopeless to her, but she had to try. And she wasn't going to feel better if she didn't work on it. Moving on didn't mean she had to forget Jasper, it just meant that she created herself a new life.

But still... still even if all this made perfectly sense to her too. It still was easier said than done. She didn't know how Bella could sit there in front of her, so secure and certain, when she was dead on the inside herself. She knew how Bella had been the last time Edward left her; she'd gone completely mad, done all those crazy things, like she wouldn't be able to live without him. But she wasn't doing that now... She was working on it, she was trying to handle it.

Alice wondered what made the difference.

"You really need to eat something soon, Alice." Bella told her in a caring yet firm voice, "You need to eat, and you need to shower so we can have some of our Alice back." she gave her a once-over, clearly dissatisfied with her appearance, "You need to talk to Esme or she will go completely insane, and you really need to try to go to school to get your mind off things."

Alice blinked a few times, "That's a lot of things I need to do..."

"Rome wasn't built in a day." Bella responded to her, and as the cliché crept across her lips, Alice was sure she heard the hint of a smile in her voice.

She was right, she undeniably was, but it still wasn't clear to Alice how she could be so together about things.

"Why aren't you broken?" she whispered then, her eyes searching Bella's body, for any hint of a dent, of something unusual, but she couldn't' find a thing. "Why aren't you broken like me?"

Bella held a hand to her chest, placed right on top of her dead heart, "I'm broken on the inside, believe me Alice... I'm just as broken as you."

Alice didn't know what to reply to that. She stared lamely back at Bella with confused eyes, but she couldn't get herself to say a thing. It didn't matter anyway, for when she looked into Bella's eyes, she could see that they were empty. But Bella had reasons for keeping up a still façade, and suddenly Alice could see why. She had Renesmee, she had Esme and she had school to worry about.

Bella didn't want to forget Edward – just like Alice herself didn't want to forget Jasper – but she still wanted to move on, she didn't want to sulk around, though she had forever in her hands.

Alice glanced down at herself and made a quick decision. "I'm going to take a shower."

Another smile played across Bella's lips, but Alice had left the couch before she had the chance to see it.

–

As Alice scanned through her unpacked bags after a long and actually very comforting shower, she could hear that her entire family had returned home. They were chatting downstairs, doing the usual things. Rosalie kept talking about all the new clothes she had bought and the things she wanted to work at sometime when she felt like it, but it was probably because the blonde vampire was afraid that if she stopped talking, an uncomfortable silence would overtake them all.

Alice could hear Renesmee tripping around downstairs as she kept denying to play a game of something with Emmett. He wasn't particularly pleased with this, but there wasn't much he could do about it. Carlisle wasn't working tonight, he'd turned on the TV and was now absent-mindedly in the middle of his busy family. Esme seemed happier today than she'd done in a long time, and Alice was relieved to know that it was actually because of her.

When they'd returned home from Port Angeles, Bella had immediately gulped out something along the lines of "_Alice is taking a shower! She's taking a shower!_", which had caused the older vampire to drop the things she was holding and move her hands to her mouth in surprise while she held back a yelp. After that she had been humming around downstairs, doing this and that.

Alice knelt down in front of the last of her suitcases and opened it up, hoping to find something she'd like to wear in this one. Not that she was looking out to dress up, but she still wanted to wear something comfortable. She paused though, when she realized which bag she had opened.

It was Jasper's old clothes.

Not all of it, of course, because it wasn't near big enough to hold it all, but some of it – some of all his favourite things. Alice had packed them and brought them with her as they moved back to Forks, simply because she couldn't bare to leave it behind. But now, as she looked into it, as it was thrown in there in a mess, she couldn't remember why that was.

Seeing it all before her eyes, she was reminded of him once again. Not that she had ever forgotten, but it was so hard to face it outside her head. There was his vest, his favourite jeans. His blue dress shirt and tie... It all looked so – so – so _Jasper._

"Oh." Alice whimpered as she reached out a pulled his jeans to her in a fast movement. It was unbearable to see it there, to have it there, it was so tough to face it again. But why – why had she brought it with her, when she didn't know why?

She heaved in a deep gulp of air, and suddenly that question was answered, and Alice kicked herself for her own stupidity. Of course she'd brought his clothes with her. She had brought it with her because – because it was all him. It _smelled _of him. That wonderful smell she had snuggled into so many times as they laid in their huge bed, or sat in the couch, her back pressed against his chest. Or her nose in the crook of his neck, or her lips against his scratchy cheek. It was... it was wonderful.

The pixie buried her nose into the smell that was all him and took in a deep whiff of that nice, familiar smell. A smell she had almost forgotten, not having smelled it in more than two months. But it was nice to have it back, more comforting than anything she had thought.

Alice let the jeans fall onto the huge pile of clothes, wanting to lock the smell into the suitcase again, so it wouldn't suddenly disappear or be infected by something else. She grabbed the blue dress shirt though, before she closed the suitcase. And she threw it around herself, buttoning each button slowly, while smelling the collar, happy to have his smell with her – just for now.

Enthralled by the lovely scent, she picked out a pair of black leggings from one of her own suitcases and pulled them on too, along with a pair of fluffy socks. She felt home in this, comfortable, and that was all that mattered at the moment.

She was pulled out of her own thoughts as she heard her name being mentioned downstairs.

"...Alice so long? The shower stopped about an hour ago."

It was Esme, and her voice was full of concern, as usual. Alice smiled to herself and decided that she was going to try from now on. She might not have Jasper there with her anymore, but if Bella could find other things to fight for, to be there for, then so could she. She'd just have to start with all the small things. It didn't mean that she was going to forget about Jasper, going to stop missing him and going to stop thinking about him, it just meant that she was going to try and be more happy.

She wanted to try. At least for Esme. She owed her that much, after everything she had given her.

Alice swept through her slightly open door and was in the kitchen before a second had passed. The smile on Esme's face could not be described.

"Alice!" she said, and though she wasn't as happy as she could be, Alice could tell that she was relieved to see her there, after so long, "...do you want to join us for movie night?"

Alice sniffed the collar of Jasper's shirt again, and with the comforting smell of his scent in her nostrils, she knew that she could handle this – just for them. "Yeah," she whispered, for the first time in very long trying to be optimistic, trying to be herself, "I want to. What are we watching?"

Esme's eyes shone with happiness and Alice turned around to skip into the living room, where everyone was getting seated, ready to spend some time together, for the first time in a very long time. It felt nice to try, not only for herself, but for Esme as well.

Alice stopped in her tracks though, when her eyes met Bella's, which were shining with a weird sparkle as well.

Oh yeah. She was going to try for Bella, too.

* * *

_Sorry if this chapter seems a bit crappy, but it's been written at completely different times, some of it before I went to Paris, some of it after, and it might seem a bit of a mess, so I apologise. But it's still hard for me to get Alice in character like this, and it definitely didn't make it better that I had a huge break after the first two pages and just couldn't get back on track. I still hope it was worth reading, though. _

_I want to thank you for reviewing and reading the first chapter. I'm thankful that I got so much positive feedback and that a lot of you seem to recognize how much I put into it, and that I really wanted to try and write a different Bella/Alice story. So thank you. It's very much appreciated. _

_I will try to update as fast as possible, though I just started my last year of school and it will – without a doubt – take up a lot of my time, along with housework, homework and training. But I will try. Because I need to write if I ever want to focus properly in school, anyway – that's just how I roll. This is me relaxing ;b _

_I'd love to hear your opinions on this second chapter as well. If there's anything you'd like to see happen, or anything you think would be particularly in character for Alice to do – please let me know, and I'll consider it, because I do want this story to be the best it can be. Or if there's certain other things you thing some of the other Cullens might do or not do as a reaction, I'd love to know that too. _

_**Disclaimer; **I don't own Twilight, I'm simply writing this for my own enjoyment – and hopefully yours ;) _


	3. Chapter Three

**Chapter Three**

She felt like she couldn't hear a thing.

The silence inside of her was eerie. It pulsated through her with a pace of its own, vibrating through her head, beat after beat, and she wasn't quite sure what she was supposed to do with it. It scared her that suddenly her head could be so empty, yet so full of all the things she didn't want to think about. She could hear every thought in her mind, and she just wished that something else would come and grasp her attention so it wouldn't seem so bad.

Now she understood what Edward had always been moaning about during those long school hours – hearing an entire student body's thoughts must be horrible, especially if one couldn't deal with their own thoughts to begin with.

She hoped that something would happen soon, something good, or something bad, to her it didn't matter, if just something happened so she could think of something else other than Jasper. In the beginning it had been quite comforting, though very painful. She had wanted to remember him and their happiest moments, though it had hurt her like nothing else. It had been everything on her mind, nothing else had mattered, nothing else had been thought of, but now – now when it was still all inside her head – she wished that she _could_ think of something else.

Everything around her was quiet, everything except the memory of them. And she wished that she could disappear out of her own head, if only for a few seconds, just so she'd be able to not deal with it. At least that'd give her a break.

Alice squinted her eyes together and tried to focus on the magazine she was reading. She'd been on the same page, sentence, word for approximately ten minutes now and she was getting nowhere. At least she was trying to read, she had to applaud herself for that. Bella had hopefully brought their assignments and homework with her from school, thinking that – after she had finally showered and dressed herself – Alice might want to get back into some sort of routine, but Alice hadn't touched any of it.

She'd heard Rosalie disagree with Bella's methods plenty of times, and Bella had just kept on saying that she had to do something, anything, to see if she could move forward, but Rosalie had snorted and told her she'd get Alice something to read. The next day the blonde vampire had returned home from school with a stack of magazines, and though Alice hadn't thrown herself into them like her sister might have hoped, she seemed way more drawn to them than to Bella's homework. Fashion and celebrities had always held more of her interest than Medea and Greek mythology.

Alice did her best to focus again, and tried to really understand what she was reading. It was hard though, when her eyes kept moving to the side, scanning the colourful pictures, and her thoughts kept skipping away from the material to other things.

She closed the magazine and tried to listen to her family tumbling around downstairs and all around her; their mere presence had given her a lot of comfort lately, and if she couldn't read, at least their busy everyday life ought to capture her attention for a bit of time. Something was going on outside – it was Jacob and Emmett, for the hundredth time trying to decide who was the strongest; Rosalie was on the computer, her fingers kept hitting the keys with a speed faster than light, and Bella was reading – maybe doing her homework? - Alice could hear her fingers scratching against the pages, her pen scribbling across the paper. Renesmee was fidgeting around downstairs, Esme was out of the house, Alice definitely couldn't hear her, and Carlisle was-

_He looked up when he heard four firm knocks on the door; one first, then three others following quickly after each other. Without seeing who it really was, he knew who was on the other side of the door, he always knew when it was her; it was the way she knocked, so light and playful – even when she wasn't all cheerful. _

"_Come on in." he said then, bending his head to close the paper he had been reading, carefully pushing it aside, and folding his hands beneath his chin, just as his granddaughter entered his office. _

"_Carlisle." Renesmee smiled at him and softly closed the door behind herself, before she crossed the floor and sat down in front of him on the chair that each member of the family occupied every now and then. _

_Carlisle offered her a soft smile. He'd been able to do that lately; smile at times, and it was a nice change. Since Renesmee and Jacob got back, things had felt more like they used to. Rosalie and Jacob couldn't stand to keep away from each other's throats, and Renesmee was there to make everyone all the more happy. "Nessie." he confirmed. _

_She crossed her legs gracefully and eyed him from beneath her thick eyelashes, "Carlisle, I'm really concerned." she stated, blinking repeatedly, "Ever since Jacob and I returned, I've noticed things... I mean – I've been pretty sad myself after losing Dad, but truth is – I've been more concerned about Mom and the others. I couldn't stand the thought of losing more of you guys." _

_Carlisle nodded in understanding. Renesmee had been crushed about the loss of her father, that had been clear to everybody, and Bella had done all in her might to ease her pain, though Renesmee probably hadn't really needed it. Though she had been sad, she had still been very together about everything. She had kept taking care of her mother, as Bella had taken care of her, and they'd pulled through well, both of them. So he wasn't quite sure what Renesmee was getting at, though he had a slight idea. "Then what concerns you, Nessie?" he questioned her in a hurried voice. _

_She blinked a few times, "Grandma, really." she said, and it was a bit awkward, because when it came to Esme, Carlisle always knew best, and he knew she hadn't been all good, but he hadn't known what to do about it. She'd lost two more of her children, as if the first time – during her human life – hadn't been enough. The younger vampire breathed in shakily before she added, "...and Alice. Too." she finished. _

_Carlisle nodded and let his hands drop to the table in front of him, "That's very observant of you, Renesmee." he told her with pride in his voice. She knew how to read people, she could tell when they were feeling bad, and along with that she was also so selfless that she'd do anything for the people she cared about. It was a nice mix between the best qualities of her mother and her father – perfectly meshed together. _

_She tilted her head to the side, her soft curls pillowing themselves onto her left shoulder as she watched him closely, "I'm just.." she trailed off, searching for the right words to say, "I know aunt Alice is crushed after uncle Jasper's gone, and she's not handling it very well. Mom's been crushed too, but she's been... better." she finished off, a sad smile across her face. _

_But it was a beginning. It was a smile. _

"_Your mother has been handling this very well, I agree." Carlisle said. Because that was one thing that he'd feared, had thought he'd have to deal with, but had – happily enough – never appeared. He'd thought that he'd have to pick Bella up from the ground along with the rest of their family and pick up the pieces; that she would have ruined herself like when they all left her the first time. But she hadn't broken down that way, she'd dealt with her pain differently, and Carlisle couldn't be more proud of her. "It's a whole other story with Alice..." he raised an eyebrow in a saying manner and left the rest unsaid. _

_Renesmee softly bit her lip, letting it linger between her lips for a few seconds, before she – thoughtfully – answered, "Her and Jasper depended on each other." she stated, not a doubt in her voice, "On an entire other level than the rest of us. There was something there." _

"_They did." Carlisle agreed. He didn't have to say more, because they both knew it was the truth, and there was no point in discussing it further right now. Perhaps they'd never really understand it. _

_Her eyes sparkled weirdly when Renesmee spoke again, "And you'd think that Esme would be crushed losing two of her children – which she is-" she added, when a confused look swept briefly across his face, "-but that's not what concerns her the most. She's afraid she'll lose another one." _

_For a second Carlisle wasn't entirely sure what Renesmee was getting at, but suddenly it all made sense to him. Esme had handled her pain surprisingly well, and quickly tumbled back into her old routine, though she had been looking a lot after Alice lately. He hadn't really questioned it, thinking she was just making sure that she was doing okay, but when he thought about it, she hadn't really given Bella the same sort of attention. Perhaps Esme really had been concerned – so concerned she hadn't even really dealt with her own pain yet – that she'd lose Alice too, simply because she couldn't handle life without Jasper? _

_Renesmee blinked again, "Does it make any sense at all?" she wanted to know. _

_Carlisle had to chew on it a bit more, but it was starting to make perfectly sense to him from that moment on. Renesmee had always been smart and noticed things around her, but she'd become even more observant since the last time she and Jacob had been home. "It makes perfectly sense, Nessie. I'm very glad you told me about your thoughts." _

_She grinned at him, a truly happy smile, "Considering this is the longest I've spoken in a while, you should count yourself very lucky." _

_He laughed too and it felt sort of good. _

"_I assume you'll figure out what to do next?" Renesmee questioned as she pushed her chair back and stood up, her voice playing across her tongue in a hoarse manner, not usually used as much as she'd done the past fifteen minutes. _

_Carlisle gave her a short nod, and as she turned to leave his office, he swung around in his office chair and glanced out the window behind him, which gave him a clear view of the forest that surrounded their house. _

_What was he going to do next? _

-Carlisle was reading the paper in his office, just as Alice snapped out of it.

She closed her eyes and bent her head down, rubbing her eyes with the balls of her hands. What the crap was _up_ with that vision? Why would Renesmee and Carlisle discuss her and Esme like that? Sure, she knew that she hadn't been up to that much lately, but she sure as hell couldn't have been the zombie they made her out to be. Why wouldn't they just come and talk to her about it instead of talking about her when she wasn't there?

She leaned back, let her arms fall to the sides and groaned out lowly. What was she going to do next? Was she going to confront them about it and spare them the talk? It was always the same questions that needed to be answered when she'd seen a vision. She was always afraid of doing the wrong thing, because it could end horribly. Especially after the last decision she made considering a vision – she was not that fond of having to make another one.

The other visions she'd had since the 'accident' had only been about herself and Bella, and they hadn't been anything special; their future had kept changing before her eyes, as she would have expected. This was the first real vision she'd had of other people since then, and it was a nice change, and it reassured her that she wasn't completely broken. Jacob was just far enough away for her to sense these things, so right now she felt pretty relieved that her ability was still intact.

Alice held her breath when suddenly the pacing changed downstairs. She shot out of her seat, rushed to the door, which was halfway open, and peeked outside; she could hear Renesmee walking slowly up the staircase. Was she – was she going to talk to Carlisle _now_? But that was so soon! She hadn't even had time to decide what to do yet... What – what was she going _to do_ about this?

Alice made a rash decision; she didn't want to mess with their conversation, but it was nice to let her niece know that she wasn't a complete zombie. She stepped out of her room, and met Renesmee halfway up the staircase. "Say hi to Carlisle for me." she said, before she continued down the stairs, hoping to leave Renesmee the perfect amount of perplexed, though it was unlikely.

The other vampire continued upstairs and down the hallway, and Alice listened carefully – yup, she _was_ going to Carlisle's office – before she looked around, trying to decide what to do next. Well, now she had left her room and gone downstairs, and it would be pointless (and look almost sort of guilty) if she just went back upstairs again. If she did something whilst she was down here, she'd have something to do, and perhaps everything wouldn't feel so quiet around her.

Deciding to go hunt Bella down somewhere, Alice turned towards the spotless kitchen where she could still hear Bella – for some reason the other girl preferred to work in there, she said. It'd always been a weird personality trait she had; she said the kitchen calmed her somehow – perhaps because she'd always cooked so much?

Alice didn't want to dwell too much on Bella's weirdness, so she just sped into the kitchen and stopped in front of Bella, who was – correctly – doing homework on the counter, books stacked before her (because for some reason – even if they'd probably done this before – Bella preferred to _actually_ study), but she looked up, as Alice stopped with a swift or wind flowing across the papers there.

She seemed surprised to see her there, but her smile was real, "Alice!" she cheered; she always made such a big thing out of it whenever they talked. Not that Alice didn't come downstairs, it had actually been a lot better since the other day when she wore Jasper's pants, but she still liked to be in her room a lot – she needed time to think.

"Are you studying?" Alice whispered, as she leaned forward, placing her elbows on the counter, and glancing at Bella from across the table.

Bella clicked her pen and placed it on her paper, "Yeah. I'm researching a... biology project." she gave Alice a questioning look, "You should be studying too."

Alice didn't want to comment on that. She knew she had to try and go to school soon, but as long as she wasn't eating, she knew that Esme wouldn't have it. She had actually considered joining her family for a hunt the next time they went, but she still wasn't sure if that was really what she wanted. And she didn't want to be out there, ready to hunt, and then back out of it. She did have a little pride left in her small body.

Bella tried again, her voice a bit rougher this time, "_Alice_."

"I'm gonna go for a walk in the woods." she said then, before she knew what she'd done; it slipped right out of her, through her slightly parted lips, and hung in the air between them as a statement, as something fragile and new, something long forgotten. She wasn't sure if this was really what she wanted to do, but it had spilled out of her quickly, and perhaps it was an unconscious thing.

Bella's face immediately lit up, "Really?" she questioned, and Alice swore she'd never seen anyone else get as excited as Bella about a walk, "Do you want me to join you?"

Alice took a step backwards and shook her head, her spiky black hair whipping against her cheeks, "I'd rather go alone." she finished, and before Bella could say another word, she'd sped out of the kitchen and straight into the backyard, passing Emmett and Jacob, and jumping across the small river like never before.

-

There was sort of quiet in here as well, but it was a good sort of quiet.

It seemed like all her thoughts about Jasper, her future and Bella had left her, stayed behind in their house with all the other bad vibrations, and as she was skipping through the forest she couldn't dwell on them too much. There was still quiet all around her, in her head and in the forest, but it wasn't the same. She could _think_ now – but she could think about other things.

There were birds chirping and wind whistling and the trees with their big arms and leafy fingers played across her shoulders as she jumped into a big tree, settling herself against the trunk, her fingers scraping the moss and the bark. She had a good view of everything up here, and she swung herself a bit higher, glancing through the green crown with her trained eyes.

The wind breezed against her stone-like skin, but it felt good to sit there, against the rough tree and think of everything but the things she'd thought most about lately.

Her brain was on break and she was filled with a sense of harmony as she listened to the busy sounds of the forest around her, let it close in on her, her there, all alone, thinking.

She thought that everything was going better now. There was still so many things to sort out, but the fact that she was sitting there, right against that tree, meant that she'd come so far. She'd showered, she'd left the house. She was getting closer and closer, and for the first time in a very long time, she wasn't just doing this for others, she wasn't going to try for them. For the first time, she actually believed that she was going to be okay.

Another sweep of cold wind hit her in the face and her entire body stirred when the scent of something else caught her nostrils. A different, yet familiar feeling, flowed through her body, pulsated through every fibre of her being, and she wrinkled her nose as her eyes scanned the ground beneath her.

The burning in her throat was unmistakable, and though she hadn't thought she would, she welcomed the feeling with a sly smile across her face as her eyes zoomed in on a deer – though small and fragile – a few feet away from the root of the tree she was in.

She'd feared this day would never come, but it had, and though she wasn't her usual strong self; not as quick and fierce, due to the fact that she hadn't eaten for so long (which might be why, oh so suddenly, her throat was burning more than usual), but she still had one huge advantage to the defenceless animal beneath her – she could predict its next move with ease.

It was going to turn left then right in just a few seconds, so Alice climbed – soundlessly – from this tree to another, until she was seated in a completely different one, more smaller and less leafy than the first one, though that didn't matter. She took a firm grip on a branch and leaned forward, her feet pushing her away from the trunk, as she watched the deer come closer. She breathed in again, and once more her throat burned with the familiar feeling, the need she'd suppressed for so long now, and she held on tight, still, waiting until it was exactly beneath her, so all she had to do was let go and she'd catch it.

The deer stopped in its tracks, its ears peeking in every possible direction as it held its head high. Alice bit her lip, resting in the horrible – yet comforting – feeling of her throat being on fire by the mere smell of something so small and defenceless. As the deer bent its head again, aiming for some grass near the tree, Alice sucked in a deep breath and let go of the branch she was holding on to.

-

She felt lighter than she'd done in a long time as she – almost – flowed across their backyard, passing the place where Emmett and Jacob had, just earlier, fought each other. She felt relieved, better than she'd done in a long time. Her entire body felt at ease, and a sense of peace pulsated through her, from her head, to her fingertips, to her smallest toe. She felt light-headed, almost dizzy, but it was a nice change. She actually felt like she might be able to handle life – right at that moment. It wasn't just going to be okay, she was going to make it great. Not for Esme or for Bella, but for herself.

The lithe vampire stepped into the house through the kitchen door, which she'd used when she left too, and found Bella still sitting by the counter; but she was getting her things together. Putting pencils away and closing books.

The brunette looked up again when Alice stopped in front of her, almost bursting to tell Bella the news; tell her that she was sure that it was going to be okay – it had to – that finally she'd decided to view things optimistically. The good, old and familiar Alice... she'd really missed her.

But Alice didn't need to say a thing; Bella's eyes zoomed in on her first, then they went wide, and a knowing smile found its way across her face, "You hunted. Didn't you?" she asked her, finishing off with a well-placed cocked eyebrow.

Alice had hoped she'd be able to burst out the happy news, but not even this was going to ruin her mood. She'd come this far – and yes, she still had far to go – but this was always something, "I did." she said and the smile that appeared on her face was something else; something bigger, something more.

Bella couldn't help but crack a grin too, "I could totally tell that you hunted!" she said and shot out of her seat, across the counter, and crushed Alice in a strong hug. Her happiness was evident, and though Alice had vowed she was going to try for herself, it wasn't a bad thing that it made Bella smile as well.

They pulled back, just as Emmett entered the kitchen, his cap backwards and a goofy grin across his face. Rosalie came fuming in right behind him, so perhaps he'd said something that didn't go down quite well with her.

"What's up, girls?" he questioned them, ruffled Bella's hair and jumped onto the counter where he landed with a smack.

Bella beamed at him, before Alice even had time to talk, "Alice hunted!"

Emmett's eyes went wide, and Rosalie completely forgot to be angry, "You hunted?" she asked her sister, a satisfied smile briefly showing on her face, "Alice, that's great."

Alice didn't really want to make such a big deal out of it, but that's not possible when one lives in a house with vampires such as Emmett and Rosalie. The boyish vampire jumped off the counter again and gave Alice a bone-crushing hug, "I'm proud of you Allie-Callie!" he reassured her, and though she still wasn't fond of that stupid nickname of his, it made her feel better, because for a second, it actually felt like everything was back to normal. Especially when Emmett grabbed a pot and a wooden spoon – their props – from the counter and banged the spoon against the spotless steel, as he marched into the living room, loudly announcing that, "Ladies and Gents, I've got outstanding news – Alice Cullen went hunting – yes, I did say hunting, Nessie-" he added, when Renesmee peeked at them from the backside of the couch, "-so everybody, I think it's time to celebrate that-"

"Emmett!" Alice hissed, not quite sure if she wanted to let him go on, or if it was better if she stopped it before it got out of hand, which, naturally, it had a tendency to do when Emmett was involved.

Emmett paused – both with his banging and with his steps – and shot her an innocent look, "Allie-Callie, I'm just letting everyone know that you went hunting. It's a big day for everybody." he flashed his set of outstanding white teeth before he started banging again.

However, he didn't get to do it for long, because Carlisle and Esme appeared from up the stairs, "Thank you Emmett, I think everyone heard it now." Carlisle told him in a stern – yet slightly amused – voice.

Esme gave him a firm look beneath her red treasures, "Put that back." she told him, referring to the pot and the spoon with only a small gesture of her hand.

Emmett retired to the kitchen right away.

Jacob peeked at them too from the couch, where he and Renesmee had been lying together; watching some sort of TV show. He was amused as well, and he couldn't hide his grin. But one look from Bella, who was beside Alice, where she'd been all along, wiped that grin right off.

Esme then glanced at Alice, a warm look in her compassionate eyes, "Did you really go hunting, Alice?" she asked her, quickly descenting the final steps of the staircase, so she could stop in front of Alice, a hand on each of her shoulders. Alice didn't reply, but simply let Esme study her, her warm eyes scanning every part of her body, just to make sure. "You look good." she finished, as their eyes locked again.

And Alice opened her mouth to say something, to reply back to her, but for some reason she couldn't say a word. They got stuck in her throat, as her eyes trailed from Esme's to the rest of her face. She looked ravaged, older somehow. Her skin wasn't as healthy as it used to, and suddenly the weight of her arms seemed to push Alice towards the floor.

It struck her then and there – Esme really was hurting. And she was hurting badly.

Alice swallowed loudly and locked her eyes with her mother's again, "I feel better." she replied to her in her high voice, small yet completely audible.

Esme dropped her hands again and stepped backwards, right into Carlisle's waiting arms; she fit perfectly there, her shoulder against his armpit, perfectly taken care of in his embrace. He squeezed her closer to him, completely aware of the fact that he was her protector more than anything.

Renesmee appeared completely from behind the couch, jumped the back of it, and stood there, by the other side of the room, her hands on her back, with an innocent look she'd – without a doubt – been taught by Emmett, who'd been her teacher in all mischievous tasks, "So do you think you'll be joining us for school soon, aunt Alice?"

Alice shrugged. The sound of school still didn't sound that good to her, but she knew she'd have to go there soon. At least if she was going to try, that was a big part of it. She couldn't stay at home forever.

Bella nudged her gently in the side, "Our teachers keep asking about you, wanting to know when they'll see our last family member."

The sideways grin on Bella's face trigged something in Alice, "I think they'll see her soon." she whispered then, and felt the heavy arm of Rosalie around her shoulders too. She glanced up at her, and Rosalie's pink lips curled into a smile.

Everyone had been smiling a lot today, and Alice had a feeling that things were finally looking up for them.

"She's going to school now," Rosalie said, her voice carrying itself throughout the entire house, as everybody was watching them, "who knows, soon she'll be dancing like a ballerina once more."

The sound of dancing sounded good to Alice, but it also concerned her, because she didn't know who she was supposed to dance with – Jasper had always been her partner.

"I'll play the piano." the beautiful vampire finished off, before she dropped her arm from Alice's shoulder and reached for Emmett's hand instead, "Don't think I forgot about your lame-ass comment, Em, you still got some making up to do..." she begun, as she dragged him with her towards the backyard, and indicated the end of their conversation/family meeting/celebration.

Jacob, who'd joined Renesmee by standing next to her, shot Alice his trademark smile. He'd let his hair grow out while he and Renesmee had been out and about, and Alice seriously thought that he needed a haircut. She couldn't even begin to imagine what he'd look like in his wolf form with his back length hair style. "Hey." he said, nodding his head a bit.

She pointed at him, "We should cut your hair soon." was the only thing she said, before she crossed the room and placed a hand on Carlisle's arm, "You wanted to talk to me?" she questioned him, as everybody watched them closely. She knew that was the decision he'd come to after his discussion with Renesmee; he'd decided to talk to her – talk to her about the situation, about everything, about... Esme.

She'd seen it on her way home from the forest, and though she had eaten, she was pretty sure that his decision was still intact.

Carlisle gave her a short nod and dropped his arm from Esme's shoulders, "Let's go to my office." he said, and Alice lead the way, her short legs carrying her gracefully up the staircase – she was getting some of herself back.

-

When he looked at her from across his desk with that certain reassuring smile of his – the smile that was so calm and compassionate – Alice got a feeling of complete security and hope. She felt serene when in his presence, because he simply had that way of his, a way that made sure that everybody was comfortable around him.

His brown eyes moved across her face, studied every part of her pale skin, and it felt good to be looked at like that, also because she knew that things were changing for the better, and that this conversation was a necessity for the future happiness of their family, not only for herself.

"It suits you to hunt, Alice." he commented then, and if it was even possible, his eyes warmed up even more.

She crossed her legs and leaned back in her seat, pushing a piece of her runaway fringe out of her now golden eyes. It would be strange to look herself in the mirror later – she'd not find a pair of completely ink black eyes looking with wonder back at her, she would see a pair of eyes that resembled her personality much more accurately. "It wasn't like I went out there, planning to go hunt, but suddenly I just..." she shrugged, "I just suddenly had the urge."

Carlisle smiled at her, "Well, that's quite alright. We were all waiting for you to feel better so you'd take that final step, we just weren't sure when it would happen." he paused, took in a deep breath as his eyes scanned hers once more, digging deeper than anyone else she knew was able to, "But I'm thrilled that it did already."

"I feel better – even." Alice softly spoke up, not afraid to confide in Carlisle; from the first time they met, he'd been like a father to her, and she knew he was always going to be. And to them, always was a very long time. "I think... I think things are going to be alright, Carlisle. I'm going to make them _be alright_."

"You don't know how much it relieves me to hear you say that." he told her, and she could tell that it really did; that he meant every word he said to her. Like always.

Alice let her eyes fall to her lap, briefly let down by how she'd only seen her own pain, and hadn't considered the others'. The image of Esme's hunted face had printed itself permanently onto the inside of her eyelids, and she desperately wanted to change that. She wanted to be able to look at her mother and not feel so guilty; she wanted to ease her pain, though she knew she couldn't make it go away completely. "I'm really sorry." she whispered, letting her eyes meet his once again, "I know I could have handled this better, and I'm sorry if I've worried you and Esme."

Carlisle kicked back in his chair slightly and reassured her, "We hadn't expected you to handle this at all. We'd never thought you should, so we've just been trying to help you and let you have your space."

"But Esme..."

"Esme's been really worried about you."

At Carlisle's confirmation, Alice felt her chest tighten.

"She's been really concerned, and she probably hasn't dealt with her own feelings yet, but you've been more important to her, than the two who weren't here anymore," he quickly continued, and though he spoke slower than usual, Alice had troubles following his train of thoughts, "you were _real_, and they weren't. It's not hard to imagine who concerns her the most, right?"

Though that sounded perfectly reasonable to her, she still found it unfair that Esme hadn't been able to deal with the pain she felt for losing Edward and Jasper just because she'd been concerned about her; she wanted to change that. Perhaps once she was feeling better, Esme would slightly feel better too.

"I'm really sorry." she said again, completely aware of the fact that she sounded stupid, but she didn't know what else to say. Sorry wasn't going to do it, it wasn't going to explain how she felt about all of this, but she also knew that Carlisle wasn't expecting _anything_ from her. And she didn't know if that was a good thing or not.

"Don't be." he blinked at her.

There was a comfortable silence between them, and Alice listened carefully to the busy house all around them; how her family seemed to get ready for the night that held so much extra time for a vampire, how they tumbled around in the living room, doing this and that; how Rosalie was having a fit in the garden, while Emmett was trying to calm her down. It was nothing out of the ordinary for them, it was completely normal, it was home, it was … life.

She bit her lip in thought, and came to a conclusion, "I'm gonna go to school tomorrow." she told Carlisle with a firm head nod, "I'm going to talk to Esme tonight, and tomorrow I'll be ready for school."

Carlisle didn't say a word to her, but she knew what he was feeling without even asking.

* * *

_I'm truly sorry about the delay between my updates, but school's really taking its toll on me. I've got a gazillion assignments and I've got homework, and I still need to run often enough, so I don't miss training. It's so hard to keep up with everything, and when I finally get time to write, I just realize how much I've missed it. I actually brought my laptop with me to school today and started writing during my classes, so I would finally be able to. I hope I didn't miss too much important information, haha :b_

_Anyway. Thanks for the nice reviews for the last chapter – it means the world to me that you guys keep reading and reviewing. I've got a question for you all then: I've been contemplating the title a lot. It doesn't really feel like it explains the story. I have a purpose with the entire "pavement" deal (which will be explained later, in a future chapter), but I'm starting to think that either "Chasing Pavements" or simply just "Pavements" would suit the story better and sound more catchy. Plus – I've been wondering about my summary too. So please, tell me what you guys think – especially about the title? _

_So yeah. Please leave me your thoughts on this chapter, so I know if I'm writing it well enough ;) ? _

_**Disclaimer; **I don't own Twilight. _


	4. Chapter Four

**Chapter Four**

So the deal was that she was going to talk to Esme tonight, and tomorrow she'd head off to school with the rest of her siblings. It seemed like a pretty okay deal to her, Alice just wasn't sure exactly how to go around it; there was so many things that she could do to reassure Esme, the tough part was to figure out where to start.

But she was just going to have to try; it was all she could do. She could try and then see where it lead her. That was why, she was now coming down the stairs at two o'clock in the morning, in search for her mother. She stopped by the end of the staircase though, as her ears peeked. Was that... music coming from the other room?

Alice couldn't keep the smile off her face when she realized what was happening. Rosalie was playing the piano again, she was playing music so they could dance once more. And it didn't make her feel strangely uncomfortable like she had feared it would, it actually made her feel sort of relieved and... happy.

She jumped the last steps just as Renesmee made her way through the room, having heard the music from the backyard too. She looked curious, and her eyes were lit up in that certain way, and she waved Alice with her, urging her to go along.

"It's _Bella's Lullaby_, isn't it?" she breathlessly whispered, as the two peeked into their huge music room, where Rosalie was sitting in front of the grand piano, her fingers playing across the white keys with a life of their own. She was completely focussed on her music; her head was hidden behind a shield of blonde hair, and she concentrated like they rarely saw her do. She wasn't going to mess up Edward's music, Alice knew that that was the reason.

Alice confirmed her question with a soft nod, and as Renesmee stepped into the room, only stopping right next to the piano with her elbows resting there, she kept by the door, halfway inside, and halfway out, not exactly sure if she really wanted to be there. She felt optimistic about this, thrilled even, but there was still something that told her that all wasn't good.

Rosalie could play the piano too, but she was no Edward. He'd always been the best piano player, and though Rosalie was fast as hell, as her fingers danced their dance, she could never compose her own music like Edward had done; she wasn't creative enough for that, she wasn't inspired by everything around her – no, she was better at designing clothes. And that was okay too, because she didn't need to be able to compose to play beautifully.

Just then Alice realized that Bella was sitting in the other end of the room on their small sofa. Her eyes held so much sadness, yet she still seemed happy that this song was being played for her. Of course it would remind her, like nothing else, of her romance with Edward; she'd be reminded of her human life, where they'd just met and she thought she had her whole life in front of her. She looked beautiful, as she sat there, her eyes wide in wonderment, her hair pushed back, Alice had got to admit that – never once had she seen anything just quite as stunning as that picture.

The pixie wanted to take a step into the room, to join her sisters and niece, to tentatively take that first step in her floating ballet, but she couldn't get her feet to follow instructions. She was – for some reason – nailed to the spot, and that feeling of something bad wouldn't leave her chest in any way. She thought that it was going to happen, and though it wasn't exactly a vision, it was close enough, and she was usually right about these things.

As Rosalie's fingers went into overdrive at a particularly hard spot in _Bella's Lullaby_, Alice heard a door slam close, and snapped her head to the side, only to see Esme entering the room from a door in the other end of the wall. The usually so compassionate and happy face was screwed up in hurt and anger, and her eyes were shooting lightnings. It was quite frightening for Alice to see her like that, because it was something that rarely happened.

Esme marched across the floor in her fragile frame as everyone turned to look at her; the music stopped playing, and Rosalie looked up too, her pale face overwritten with confusion. Renesmee backed off slightly, taking a few steps backwards.

The oldest vampire stopped in front of them, her hands on her sides and her jaw clenched. "What are you doing?" she whispered, her eyes locked to Rosalie's in a firm glare, while Alice, on the sideline, held her breath in anticipation – this might very well be breaking point for Esme, and in that case – though sadly enough – her assumptions and her feelings would have been right on money.

When Rosalie opened her mouth to speak, she was stuttering slightly, which rarely happened too (this was a rarely-moment for almost everybody), "I – I was just... I thought it'd be good to – to – to play music and... _dance_."

It was so weird to see her sister like this, overpowered by another person. Though they all obeyed when Esme told them to do something (no matter how much it displeased them), it had never been like this, Rosalie had never been this overruled.

Esme raised her right hand, and for one second – one completely life-altering, time-standing-still sort-of second – Alice thought that she was going to hit Rosalie, but instead her action turned softer when she placed a gentle hand on top of the grand piano, that had been one of Edward's most loved possessions. She stroked it a few times, love shining through her eyes like never before, "_No one_ plays this piano," she surely said then, her voice shaky and low, though just as firm, "it was _Edward's_ piano."

She looked up at Rosalie again, and the usually fierce vampire had already let her fingers drop from the keys, where they had been resting, and to her lap, "I'm – I'm sorry." she whispered, and never – in all these years – had Alice heard her sound so small.

Esme's jaw was still clenched tightly and she gave the piano another stroke, before she turned around and was out of the room, before anyone could say another word, her reddish treasures whipping past Alice as she went for the backyard, and – eventually – the forest.

Rosalie was still pretty much frozen in place, and Bella was watching on with wide eyes. Renesmee, however, had already taken a few steps, following in her grandmother's tracks, but Alice put a hand out to stop her. "I'll handle this, Nessie." she whispered, determination in her voice.

Renesmee didn't say a word, and she didn't move either, so with one last glance at her two other sisters, Alice had fled the house.

-

She found Esme completely hunched together, sitting up against a tree, half hidden from view in the dark night. She hugged herself close, her head was bent, her hair spilling across her arms, and she seemed smaller than usual, almost completely gone, and Alice stopped a bit away from her, glancing at her as worry streamed through her body. She didn't like seeing Esme like this; she didn't deserve to be hurt; that one person who'd never hurt a soul, she didn't deserve feeling like this.

Alice wasn't sure if it was appropriate to interrupt whatever she was going through at the moment, but she'd also feel bad about leaving her there all alone; and she'd assured Renesmee that she'd take care of it, so she better do it. It'd be the perfect opener for their conversation anyway.

She softly stepped closer and slid down next to Esme against the tree; the other woman was heaving as if tears should have been streaming, and all Alice could do was place a comforting arm around her mother's shoulders, waiting for her to heave it out. She felt Esme tense up a little at first, but eventually her touch seemed to relax her, as her shoulder seemed to fall down and she breathed more properly.

"Are you okay?" Alice softly questioned, her bell-like voice carrying itself through the woods along with the millions of other sounds around them.

Esme lifted her head up, and though she looked troubled, she offered Alice a weak smile, "I feel better now, thanks." she said, placed her head against the tree and stretched her legs out completely.

Alice offered her a smile as well as a response.

"I just couldn't handle listening to that song." Esme breathlessly told her, her eyes planted straight on something in the top of the woods, though Alice couldn't imagine what that would be. "I mean... it was Edward's song, y'know? And _Edward's_ piano..." she shook her head to herself, "It was too hard for me, Alice, I haven't really..." she stopped speaking without saying what she hadn't really.

Alice gave her shoulders a light squeeze before replying, "I think that Rosalie was just trying to make everyone feel like the good old days." she suggested, remembering the feeling of complete happiness that they used to have when they danced around their ballroom, swinging each other along to the music, "She wasn't trying to do Edward's thing."

Esme sighed deeply, "I know that, Alice, I just... I couldn't handle it. Of course she was just thrilled that you were feeling better, and she wanted to increase that, it was just... too much for me, really."

"I understand that." Alice whispered, letting her arm drop from Esme's shoulders and to her own lap.

Esme turned her head to hers then, their noses almost touching as they leaned against the tree, "I guess it just really hit me there that they're really gone."

A feeling of sadness overtook her body again when the subject of them being gone was mentioned; Alice knew it would, she hadn't expected differently, but she was going to handle it better this time. She looked into her lap for a few seconds, just to compose herself and looked up at Esme again, "I know you've been trying to help me," she said, "that's why you haven't really dealt with this. I'm sorry."

Esme reached a hand out and gently cupped her cheek, "You were more important to me, Alice. You're here now. You and I – we still have forever together."

"Forever's a really long time without them." Alice murmured.

"It is." Esme confirmed, letting her hand drop again, "And it's gonna get better – it's only been a few months. It still hurts, and it's going to hurt sometimes in the future, even when we've moved on. I'm just so happy that you're feeling better."

Alice bit her lip, "But you should deal with it too."

Esme nodded, "I'm going to, don't worry about me. I'll be okay. We'll all be okay."

"Even when something bad happens, we always make it through, right?" Alice asked her, hope in her voice.

Esme offered her a crooked smile and nudged her shoulder, "That's life, Alice," she whispered, her voice gentle and caring as she spoke, "life for us is just like a pavement. It continues on and on, it never ends... There's a few dints and bumps on the road as we go along, but it never stops," she paused and swallowed loudly, "– it'll continue no matter if we want it to or not. There's no point trying to stop it, we just have to keep walking with our heads held high."

Alice breathed in softly as she replayed the words inside her head; it made completely sense to her, it really did. They had forever in front of them, no matter what it might bring, and of course they had time to mourn and to move on, but there was no point breaking down completely – there'd be bumps along the road, but they'd have to make it through. And they would make it through, because they had each other.

"So I'll need my time to remember Edward and Jasper with love and happiness." Esme told her then, her head once more turned towards the dark sky above them, "And once I feel better, Rosalie can play that piano, and somewhere down that road – life will be more like it used to."

Alice whispered, "...except they won't be here."

"No." Esme was quick to confirm, her gaze hovering above them, "They won't. But they'd want you to be happy. You and Bella, you'll both find love again, that's for sure."

"Right now I can't imagine loving someone other than you guys. It's too much for me." Alice replied back to her; the idea of another mate had never crossed her mind, but now when Esme was talking about it, she saw that of course it'd happen along the road. No one could spend forever alone. Maybe she'd have to wait for a long time like Edward had done, but it would happen, that was for sure.

Esme said, "Of course it is. Moving on takes time. But it will be better, I can promise you that Alice."

The small vampire sat back against the tree too and let her eyes wander to the sky like Esme's, glancing up at nothing with a weird feeling soaring through her small body.

"I moved on when I lost my baby, and I can move on again." Esme murmured.

"But we'll always remember them." Alice confirmed and let her eyes get lost in the dark infinite space above them – she wondered, was Edward and Jasper looking down at them now? Was there really a heaven, even for vampires? She'd like to believe that there was. That they wouldn't rot in hell like Edward had always proclaimed they would. She'd like to believe that, even for them, God had room. He'd created them, hadn't he? If he'd created them, he'd have room for them too. And the though of Jasper watching out for her every move, every thought, was strangely comforting. Maybe he'd be there when she needed him; if she ever needed an advice, she believed he'd be able to give it to her, just as if he'd been sitting next to her all along.

Esme broke the comfortable silence that had quickly erupted between the two of them, "You ready for school later?"

Alice felt her throat tighten, "Yes." she replied, but mentally added, _though how can I be without Jasper? _

-

It was a strange mix of feelings that overtook Alice's body as Forks High School came into view. The biggest building in their town still only housed a small amount of students, yet the sounds around them as they drove into the parking lot seemed to burst Alice's ears, for it had been a long time since she'd been around so many people at once.

Bella was driving her BMW which held Renesmee in the passenger's seat and Alice herself alone in the back-seat. In the car in front of them were Emmett driving with Rosalie next to him. They all seemed oddly ready for school this morning, but Alice thought that – perhaps – it was just to support her.

The mixture of feelings didn't stop when their cars were parked next to each other near the entrance and Alice glanced out of the window next to her. She couldn't help but be reminded of Jasper because this was a place where they'd spent a lot of their time, and it was comforting in some way, but she also couldn't help but think that this was the start of something new for her – it was a new beginning to a new life, and she better grab onto it with both hands.

Rosalie and Emmett had already exited their car and were waiting outside while all the other students hurried across the parking lot to get away from the pouring rain, but Alice wasn't in a hurry to get out of the safe surroundings of Bella's car. Renesmee unbuckled herself (Bella insisted that she always buckled up, though it was crazy, and none of the others did it) and opened the car door, just as Bella pulled the keys out of the engine and turned around in her seat to look at Alice, "You ready for this?" she breathlessly asked.

Alice drew in a shaky breath and ducked her head, glancing outside once more, "I think so, yeah."

Bella's face lit up in a happy smile, "Great! Let's get going!" she said, and opened her door too, to join the others outside as well. Alice had to close her eyes just once more, before she opened her door too and stepped outside with her siblings.

"Remember you share your classes with me and Mom." Renesmee told her as she hooked their arms together – they hadn't left their rainy spot yet; there was still a few things they needed to get clear before they stepped inside where someone might hear them.

"And remember," Bella added as she wiped her wet cheek, "Renesmee is Nessie at school, and I'm no one's _mom._" she emphasised the last part with a devious smirk in Renesmee's direction.

Alice raised an eyebrow. She wasn't stupid, she could have figured as much, but she didn't say a thing. She knew they were just looking out for her.

Rosalie shuttered slightly in the rain and wrapped her arms further around herself, "Look, can we go inside now? My hair will be ruined."

Emmett grinned at her and placed an arm around her shoulders, "Come with me, love." he said to her, and lead the way towards the small stairs into the building. They stopped right inside again to part with each other before class.

"We'll see you at lunch." Renesmee chirped to her aunt and uncle.

Rosalie ran a hand through Renesmee's hair with a look full of love, "Take care." she replied, before she and Emmett turned and went down the hall.

Bella turned to Alice again, an expectant look in her eyes, "Do you wanna get going?"

Alice motioned to the office door right down the hall, "I should go tell them I'm here, shouldn't I?" she questioned, but she didn't give them time to reply, "_Don't worry_, I'll be fine. Where's our first class?"

"It's AP Biology." Renesmee told her with a gorgeous smile.

Alice groaned inwardly, "We have AP Biology? You've got to be kiddin' me! I'm not smart like you two are." she objected to them. It wasn't even funny; those two were clever as hell, sure, she was smart too, but it was at other things; she was more creative, whilst they were more scientific – it was going to be hell.

Bella shrugged, "We figured you didn't want to take any classes alone, so it was going to be with us."

Alice gave her an eye roll and continued down the hall in her best human pace; now that she was out in public again, she was going to have to watch what she did. It had been a long time, and using her vampire abilities had become a habit of hers, so she was going to try again. She could feel eyes on her back as she passed everyone with her eyes on the ground; she could hear their hurried whispers about the new girl and who she was. But she didn't do a thing, she knew that she was going to have to get used to it – even after all these years, people were still struck by the Cullens wherever they went.

She pushed the door to the office open and stepped inside. She could hear a small bell go off somewhere in the real office behind the desk, and the secretary entered from the half open door with a smile on her face. "What can I do for you?" she asked then. Her voice was a little cheerful, but Alice could tell that she was wondering who this amazing creature was in front of her; like usually.

She placed her hands on the desk in front of her and leaned in closer, "I'm here to sign up. I'm Alice-"

"Say no more." the woman winked at her, "It's not hard to see who you're related to. You're a Cullen, aren't you?" she chatted away, but didn't give Alice a chance to reply, "I know that none of you are really related, but you still have some similar features, we all know who you are."

While she had been talking, she had been fumbling around beneath the desk, and she now placed a bunch of papers between them. Alice didn't know what to say. She was right, of course, but it didn't mean that it wasn't annoying to experience this again.

"This is you schedule, though you probably already know how it goes, since you're in classes with your sisters." she looked up at her with a soft smile, "There's a couple of papers your parents need to sign, and – your name's Alice, right?"

She looked up at her at the last question and Alice confirmed it with a nod, "Alice Cullen, yeah."

"Great," she smiled and stood up straight, "welcome to Forks High."

Alice grabbed the papers in her hand and mumbled a low, "Thanks," before she left the office, stuffing them all into her book bag as she went. The first bell must have rang while she was stuck with the secretary, because the halls were empty, which she didn't mind much. She could tell that the school hadn't changed much, so she knew the way to the biology classroom by heart, and she unzipped her trendy red raincoat on the way and ran a couple of fingers through her hair.

It was definitely getting weirder by the second to be back here, but it was going to be okay, Alice knew that. And though it sucked that she was going to have AP Biology (which resulted in about a gazillion biology classes a week) it still comforted her that she had the exact same time table as Renesmee and Bella.

She stopped briefly outside the biology classroom and peeked inside – the teacher wasn't there yet, but there was a heavy chatter of voices, and she could hear Renesmee mumbling to someone; it wasn't Bella, but it was all good. Renesmee had always been more appealing for humans to talk to and befriend. She was more likeable in that aspect, and she usually made plenty of friends wherever they went. She wasn't much of a talker, but people found that they could trust her, which was a great quality to have too when making friends.

Alice took in a deep breath and decided to get it over with; she entered the classroom and pulled on her happiest smile at the moment. Everybody looked up immediately, checking to see if it was the teacher, or if they could continue their banter for a few more seconds. Alice could see that everybody froze up for a second, but she kept her eyes on Bella, who lit up in a smile. People started whispering, under the impression that she couldn't hear them, but she heard every word, and so did Bella and Renesmee.

The youngest of them happily waved her over, "I saved you a seat, Alice!" Renesmee cheered, her brown eyes wide with smiles.

"Is that their sister?" Alice heard a girl a few rows behind Bella mumble to her friend, right in front of her. The girl had flaming red hair, it was curly, and she looked particularly gorgeous.

Her friend, a plain Jane compared to the other girl, confirmed it with a slight nod, "I think so, yeah." she hushed back.

The redhead leaned in closer, "Wow, I'd love for her to go with me home and spend some time in my bed."

Alice felt her throat tighten, and had she been human, she would definitely have blushed, but she didn't say a thing, because as far as the two girls were concerned, she hadn't been able to hear them. However, one of her two siblings wasn't so tactful, and had decided – for a moment – to ignore that they were supposed to act human.

So when Alice placed her raincoat on the back of her chair like nothing out of the ordinary had been said, Bella whipped around in her seat and shot the redhead a deadly look, "Keep your mouth shut, Helena, Alice will do no such thing with you!" she hissed.

The redhead's – Helena's – eyes went wide and she leaned back in her seat, not taking this lying down, it seemed, "And how do you know that, Bella? You know everything about your adoptive sister?"

Alice placed a hand on Bella's shoulder and flashed Helena a brief smile, "Don't worry about it." she said and turned back around, Bella following her example. Renesmee, who'd been following the exchange with wide eyes, took a seat on the other side of Alice and reached for her book in her bag.

"I'm sorry." Bella mumbled, so low that only Alice and Renesmee could hear. If Helena and her friend were still watching, they'd only see their mouths move with a speed faster than light. "She's been pissing me off since day one, thinking that every girl at this school is gay and has the hots for her."

Alice eyes were fixed on the table as she replied, "Well, she _is _gorgeous, but don't worry about it."

Before Bella or Renesmee had a chance to reply to her last comment, the teacher came rushing into the classroom, a coffee mug in one hand, and a bunch of books and papers stuck beneath his other arm. With just one look at him, Alice could tell that he wasn't such a harsh teacher, and it relieved her, because that meant that these lessons might actually turn out to be very fun.

"Sorry I'm late!" he mumbled perplexedly, placing his things on the table. He fixed his glasses and took a sip of his coffee, before the mug was on the desk too. "We're going to start working with osmosis today, so I was just making sure that I had everything together." he reached for a piece of paper on the table – probably the attendance list – as he glanced around the room beneath his square glasses, "Looks like everybody's here today except-" he paused when his eyes fell on Alice, who was clearly visible between the two other Cullens, "-Alice! You're here today."

Alice shrugged lamely, "I certainly am, sir."

He flung the paper behind his back with a cheerful smile, "Well, no need to take attendance, you're all here now! Welcome to Forks High."

As Alice stared at him when he bent his neck to retrieve something from his mess of things on the table, she drew in a shaky breath, pep-talking herself. _It's all good. Bella's here with you. She's right here with you, next to you. And she's going to look out for you. You know she will. _

Just then, Alice felt a comforting hand placed upon her thigh and her pep-talk faded away, not needed any longer. She glanced to the side, to see Bella staring straight ahead, like nothing was going on beneath their table, and placed her own hand upon Bella's cold one.

She was right. No matter what happened, Bella was going to be there for her.

-

By the time lunch rolled around, all the students at Forks High knew that the last Cullen had showed up today, and they were all dying to get a look at her. It was always like that with new kids, Alice clearly remembered what it was like when Bella started all those years ago and all the boys had been going crazy for her.

The Cullens still had 'their' table in the lunch room, though it wasn't exactly where it had been all those years ago. But Emmett and Rosalie were already seated there when Renesmee, Bella and Alice entered. Rosalie had a can of diet coke and an apple in front of her, while Emmett had a bottle of water and a sandwich in front of him. It was their props, and as they went to get something too, Renesmee said the first word she'd said since their teacher called on her in Spanish, "I still think it sucks that Jacob decided to go to school in the reservation."

Bella reached for a can of sprite as she replied, "Well, you can't really blame him for wanting to spend time with his family."

Alice knew that had they been at home, that sentence would have ended with a 'honey'.

Renesmee made a face, "I just don't see him a lot – not like Rose and Emmett."

Alice zonked out of their conversation as they crossed the floor and joined their siblings. There were so many people talking around her, and it was a bit fun to listen in to what they were saying about her. Helena was bitching to her friends about the way Bella treated her, and her friend – whose name, funnily enough, was actually Jane – was telling her to wait a few days and then go for it with Alice.

She also learned pretty quickly that just about every guy around here had a crush on Renesmee. Rosalie was still considered the most breathtakingly beautiful of them, but since they all knew she had a boyfriend in Emmett, their affections had gone to Renesmee. Though Alice thought that the obvious choice then would be to crush on Bella, she could see why they'd fall for Renesmee. She didn't quite have that mysterious aura around her, and she had Bella's quiet beauty plus Edward's stunningly good looks all in one – no one could resist that.

Their food stood on the table in front of them like every other day, and the others were talking, while Alice was glancing around the cafeteria in interest. It was fun to see how much people had changed from the last students she knew here, yet some of them were very recognizable. She was sure that this guy across from her in the cafeteria must be Angela Weber's great-something-son. It was the way he carried himself as he spoke with his friends, and the characteristic smile she always had.

"They're talking about us." Rosalie stated in a low voice, right next to Alice, who was sitting in the middle.

Emmett snorted, "Well, that's stating the obvious. They're always thrilled to get some new gossip, and after Allie-Callie decided to join us, it's gone into a whirlwind."

"Well, it's not her fault." Bella concluded as she played with her can in front of her, lifting it, then sitting it on the table again.

"They're all crushing on Nessie, huh?" Alice murmured in a dream-like voice, as her eyes settled on her niece with the curly hair.

A small smile found its way onto her face, "It's sort of silly."

"Don't say that," Rosalie quickly corrected her in a firm voice, "you're gorgeous Nessie."

Alice felt a smirk coming on as a guy two tables away from them was raising from his seat, "He's going to ask you out." she whispered to them, her lips moving faster with each word, "The guy who's getting up, right behind you Nessie, he's going to ask you."

Bella's jaw clenched and she gripped the side of the table firmly, "It's only like guy number billion since we got here!" she hissed, and for a second Alice thought she was going to break a piece of the table off, but her grip loosened again, just as Renesmee turned around to come face to face with the unsuspecting boy.

His shot them a nervous smile, and Alice could practically count the beads of sweet by his hairline, and she didn't even dare to guess how quickly his heart was beating, "Ne- Nessie?" he stuttered.

Renesmee didn't reply, but shot him an expectant look.

He looked at his feet and started talking to his shoes instead, "I – I was just wondering if you'd like to – to uhm, to go out with me? Maybe?" he looked up then, a hopeful glint in his eyes.

Renesmee shot him a small smile, clearly not happy having to shoot down yet another hopeful guy, "I'm sorry, but I can't. I actually have a boyfriend."

_Or a husband,_ Alice mentally added.

"Oh but -" the boy glanced around quickly, "He doesn't go this school, does he?"

_You've gotten married and then re-married about four times. I think it's clear to everybody that you're taken, _the pixie continued inside her head.

"...does he?" the guy tried again.

Before Renesmee could reply to what he had said, Bella had spoken for her, "He goes to school in the reservation just outside town." she replied, her voice strained with fury, as she tried not to blow up at the poor guy, "And if you'd like to spread that word around, please, that'd be perfect."

The guy backed off immediately, his eyes wide in surprise. Bella seemed to have scared him off and Rosalie was chuckling madly in her seat. Bella wasn't doing the best job today, trying to stay 'human'.

"I thought you said you weren't going to act like a mother." Emmett lowly laughed.

Bella's face was still tightly set, "Well, if he thinks he can lay his moves on Nessie, he better watch it!"

Alice chuckled to herself and fell back into her chair as her family got into a small argument about Bella and Renesmee and possible wooers. So far, today hadn't been so bad. As time swept by, she became more certain that she was actually going to be okay here at Forks High – even without Jasper.

* * *

_So there you have it, me updating within a week – I'm proud of myself, haha. I hope it didn't mess with the quality of the chapter, but I'll leave you guys to decide that. I was really anxious to get to the point where Alice was going back to school, and I think that I wrote it out like I had imagined it would be from the beginning, so that's all good. _

_And the title to this story was explained in this chapter – it was all about what Esme was teaching Alice during their talk, so I hope the title makes more sense now. _

_I'm thankful to those of you who reviewed my last chapter; it means the world to me, so thank you. Please tell me what you thought of this chapter as well? _

_**Disclaimer; **I don't own Twilight, I'm simply just borrowing the characters to play around with ;b _


	5. Chapter Five

**Chapter Five**

_Helena pushed a runaway curly red piece of hair out of her eye to its correct place behind her ear. Glancing at herself in the mirror, she winked, before she leaned in closer and ran a finger beneath both eyes to catch eventual traces of mascara and eye-liner. She opened her mouth and gave her teeth a once-over too, before she stood back up straight, overall very pleased with her appearance. _

_Coming out from one of the bathroom stalls in the girl's bathroom at school, Jane was pulling down her shirt, "You really think she'll talk to you?" _

_Helena stared at her best friend through the mirror, "Why wouldn't she talk to me?" she said, her voice slightly edgy – for some reason, the subject of one Alice Cullen had bothered her a lot lately. Just like she hadn't been able to get the short Cullen out of her mind for more than five seconds. _

_Jane shrugged and stuck her hands beneath the running water, "I don't know. It doesn't seem like her sister wants her to talk to you. And you know the Cullens stick together." _

"_Whatever." Helena replied. She didn't want to think of it that way. Sure, she'd slept with practically every gay or bi girl in Forks and plenty of more in the area around Forks, but she'd never been in love before, never been infuriated by someone as she had quickly become Alice Cullen. There was something about her, and no matter what, Helena was going to get with her. _

"_Maybe she isn't even gay!" Jane objected while she turned off the water, and reached her hands out to dry them. "How do you know she's into girls?" she continued through the buzz of the drier. _

_Helena turned around on the spot, her worn converse screeching against the floors. She leaned against the sink and looked at her best friend as if she was stupid, "I just have a feeling, okay? I've got gaydar, and I'm attuned just fine, thank you." _

_Jane bit her lip in thought, "So she's gay, or what?" _

"_I don't know if she knows it, alright? Or maybe she's bi, maybe she's not out yet." Helena shook her head to herself, briefly lost in the image inside her head of her crush. Snapping out of it, she added, "I don't know, but – there's definitely something _there_." she finished in a soft voice. _

_Jane nodded and checked her appearance in the mirror much like her best friend had just done; clearly not satisfied with her looks, she glanced briefly to the side, only to be reminded of the fact that Helena was much more attractive that she'd ever be. _

_Studying her nails in lack of something better to do to pass time, Helena spoke again, "I don't know what all the guys see in that Nessie girl." she sneered, clearly not happy with the thought, "She's not even the pretty one! Alice is stunning, yet they're all over Nessie - I just don't get it..." _

"_I think they're scary." Jane mumbled as she turned around, sticking her hands into her pockets, "I mean – there's something freaky about them."_

_Helena gave her a killer-look, "They're not scary, they're all gorgeous." she stated, "Doesn't change the fact that Alice is the prettiest. The guys don't see it." _

_Jane shrugged, having no idea what to say. _

"_Maybe they can feel it too." Helena continued to herself in wonderment, "Maybe they can also feel that she's not really into guys. That'd explain why they're not going after her." _

_Jane flashed her a small smile, "Maybe." _

_Taking in a deep breath, Helena turned for the door, "Well, I'm not gonna rest until I get my date with her." _

_Jane followed her best friend outside, just as the first bell was heard, "What are you gonna say to her today?"_

"_I don't know," Helena wondered aloud as they hurried down the hall to get to their first class – biology – where she'd see her beautiful crush, "...I'll just have to wing it." _

-

Alice was flipping through one of her many magazines, lying comfortably on the couch in the living room, trying to pass some time before they had to head off to school. Like usual, she couldn't really focus on the magazine though, but this time it was because of entirely different reasons. Just a while back, she would have been thinking constantly about Jasper, not able to do anything else, but this morning, her head was stuck around one simple, nagging, question. A question she couldn't really wrap her head around, though it kept occupying all her thoughts. It had been there since she snapped out of her vision last night, and for some reason, that question just didn't want to leave her alone.

_Am I gay? _

It was a simple question, yet so hard to answer. The vision she'd seen of Helena and Jane in the school's bathroom had intrigued her in some way. It wasn't because she'd ever thought of Helena that way, though she had found her beautiful from the first time she saw her, she'd never really thought much about girls that way. But apparently Helena meant that there was 'something there'. Whatever that meant.

Alice licked her lips and threw the magazine on the table and instead stared straight into the ceiling, her hands folded beneath her head. It was a different thought for her to consider... Being gay, being with girls. It was strange to her, but she didn't really know what to think about it.

She knew that Helena was going to ask her out; most likely today at school, and she also knew that she had to say no to her, because it wasn't a good idea to involve herself with humans. She wasn't even interested in dating other people, it was simply too soon for her after Jasper was gone – she wasn't sure if she'd ever be able to date other people, but the thought of other girls still occupied her every thought right now.

She had never really thought about being gay. She didn't think, either, that she had a particular vibe she radiated off, she didn't really look gay either. There were some girls one could tell were gay from a mile away, but she was just Alice Cullen, and she'd had a husband for so many years now, the thought had never concerned her.

But suddenly, there she was, face to face with the idea. Even if she concluded that maybe she did like girls that way, she still didn't want to go out with Helena; the girl wasn't really her type of person, though beautiful, but she couldn't take it that far yet.

She tried to imagine how her family would react if she ever came home with another girl – somewhere in the far, far away future – if she came home, introducing another woman as her girlfriend and future wife; how would her family react? What would they say? There was no doubt in her mind that Carlisle and Esme would support her no matter what she chose, and she knew that Renesmee would be cool with everything; she was a much more open-minded, go-with-the-flow sort of person, and whatever she believed, Jacob would believe too. Emmett would probably tease her forever about it, he'd find it highly amusing, and Rosalie? It was never easy to say with her, but Alice had a feeling she'd always be there for her too.

Then left was Bella. What would she say? Alice wasn't really sure about this. She knew that Bella would never turn her back on her, but it wasn't easy to tell how she'd react, and if she'd be comfortable enough to get to know this new addition to their family. They had a strong friendship, the two of them, but it was also different, so very different from the relationships Alice shared with all the other Cullens. Her and Bella were just different. It was hard to say why, but they just were.

Alice decided then that she wasn't going to think more about that entire matter. It was better if she kept it in the back of her mind, and then if something happened sometime in the future – then she'd know that there was something about what Helena had said (it had already made her curious, so perhaps it would happen?). If she ever decided to date a girl in the future, she'd always think back and remember Helena for doing this to her; if it hadn't been for her comment, maybe she would have never thought much about that option.

She turned to lie on her side as Bella descented the stairs. She could hear that it was her with no problem; they all had different ways to walk, and they didn't weight the same. It was always easy to tell whoever was coming. Except for Bella and Renesmee at times – they were too much alike. But Alice knew that this was Bella, because Renesmee was outside with Rosalie.

"What are you doing?" Bella softly smiled at her. She crossed the floor and sat down on the couch by Alice's feet; now, it wasn't a particularly long couch, but Alice wasn't the tallest person, so there was plenty of room for Bella by the end.

She flashed Bella her shiny white teeth, "I'm just thinking." she airily said, before her eyes once more were drawn to the ceiling.

Bella rested her hand on her left feet and leaned back in the couch, breathing out heavily.

Alice immediately knew that something was on her mind; something different, something unusual, because Bella usually did these sort of things when she really wanted to talk about something, wanted to mention one special thought on her mind. And it concerned Alice, because some of the times she'd done this before, it hadn't really been pleasant thoughts and the talks afterwards definitely hadn't been better.

"What are you thinking 'bout?" she asked though, because she still wanted to be there for her.

Bella turned her head and glanced straight at her, "Is there room for me next to you?" she whispered, her voice barely bouncing across the small couch to Alice's ears. She seemed worn down by the thing that was bothering her; she seemed really torn by it.

Alice scooted as far into the back of the couch as she could, making just enough room for Bella to lie right there next to her. "Sure." she said, her light voice spilling across her red lips in a quick manner, as Bella hurriedly moved to lie next to her.

Alice was pressed into the couch, her head resting uncomfortably in the nook where the arm of the couch, met the back of the couch (_Is that called the shoulder of the couch?_ Alice silently wondered), and Bella was barely hanging on; their chests were pressed together, their noses almost touching, and the two looked at each other, hidden by the couch with dawn just sneaking into the living room from outside through their giant windows.

"So what's up?" the pixie gently whispered.

Bella tugged herself a bit closer by holding on to Alice's skirt, "I'm thinking about school." she revealed, a thoughtful expression across her beautiful face, "How you're holding up, how I'm holding up, how – how it is..." her voice trailed off, and Alice knew to give her a few seconds to really speak what was on her mind and not interrupt her, "...how it is without Edward."

Alice closed her eyes for a second, painfully aware of the fact that this was going to be a talk about the two people they were both missing terribly; they hadn't had many of those talks, not the two of them, though one would think they'd relate most to each other. And now things were looking up – actually, they were looking very bright – and it was painful to be reminded of it.

"I've never been to school without Edward before."

Alice opened her eyes again, only to find Bella looking straight into them. She didn't know what to say to her. She hadn't been to school without Jasper either, and it was so different. She hadn't thought that she'd be able to handle it, but she was dealing with it, and she was actually thinking that she was doing an okay job. And she felt like Bella was really there for her... which she'd thought was the other way around too, but apparently not.

"It's so different now." Bella softly murmured, her fingers drawing circles on the back of Alice's thigh, where they were currently resting, "I'm so glad that you're at school now too, Alice, it's better with you there."

It relieved her to hear that she was helping Bella get through those long hours at school as well. "It's better with you there, too." she replied in a quiet voice.

The air between them was getting thicker.

"I love you, Alice." the brunette stated, her lips barely moving as she spoke in hushed tones, "Thank you for being you."

Alice reached a hand up and gently stroked Bella's cheek, "I love you too."

Their eyes locked firmly again, and that look of love told Alice that they were going to get through this; they were already halfway there, and things were only getting better. She knew she'd only be able to do this with Bella there all the way.

"I can only go through this with you by my side." Bella spoke then, saying the exact things that Alice was thinking herself.

The short vampire couldn't keep that smile off her face, "Then it's a good thing I'm here, isn't it?"

Bella couldn't help but smile this time, either, "You're such a charmer!" she mumbled, a light giggle escaping her lips, and Alice felt like their moment of sadness was already over, and they were moving on to better things.

Alice winked at her, "That's why you love me, and you know it."

Bella opened her mouth to reply back to her again, but before she got far enough to throw in another comeback, somebody jumped up from behind the couch,

"I think that's enough mushy talk for now!"

Bella let out a shriek and fell off the couch, and Alice almost twisted her neck in surprise, when she had to turn her head to see who'd disturbed them. She wasn't surprised, though. It was Emmett. _Of course._

"Emmett, you jerk!" she hissed and sat up on the soft couch, placing a firm hand on his muscular arm, just as Bella peeked up at them from the floor too, running her fingers across the wood to see if she'd left any marks. Apparently it wasn't so bad this time.

Emmett smirked at them, "Aw, Allie-Callie, you know I hate it when you talk mushy with someone who's not me!"

Alice stuck her tongue out at him, "Boohoo."

He then turned to Bella, "And the same goes for you, Bella." he said, pronouncing every word clearly, so there was no doubt in their minds that he was very, uhm... 'mad' at her, "I'm _very_ disappointed in you. How could you say those things to her and not me?"

"Shouldn't your tongue be somewhere else?" Bella suggested with a glint in her eye, and a saying look in Alice's direction.

Emmett looked like a big question mark, "Where's that?"

"Down Rosalie's throat, now bugger off." Alice quickly snapped, before she leaned over the back of the couch, and pushed him in the right direction.

Emmett fake gasped, "I can't believe you two would say that!" he mocked them with that voice of his, "I'm gonna tell on you!"

And before they could say another word, he'd rushed through the kitchen and to the backyard, calling out "Rose! Rose!" as he went. Alice turned her head downwards and caught Bella's eyes in a brief look.

They both couldn't help but laugh.

-

They had barely entered the classroom that morning, before Alice heard Jane whisper to Helena, "Oh! There _she_ is!", and Alice tried to hide her grin from the two girls, because Jane had been not-so-subtle, but that was only for a vampire's ears.

Renesmee looked at Alice as they took their seats. She had questions in her eyes, and she looked mildly curious.

"I'll tell you later." Alice mumbled. She'd, on purpose, not told anyone about her vision, because she didn't want to bother them about silly things. And she knew that if she told him, they'd tell her to shoot Helena down immediately, and while Alice didn't want to date her, she still wanted to have a bit of fun leading her on. She thought it'd be good for her, because she was way too cocky for her own good. And Alice also knew that if she told Bella about Helena's plans, she might just attack her when she wasn't looking.

Alice turned around to get something in her bag, and came face to face with Helena. Her suspicions had been true; it was today that she wanted to talk to her, and the encounter in the bathroom had just happened right now before school. Helena was dressed exactly like in her vision, and so was Jane.

The redhead shot her a huge smile, "Hey Alice!"

"Hello." Alice mumbled and glanced briefly to the side, only to find Jane watching them with wide eyes. She looked almost afraid, and Alice remembered what she'd said to Helena in the bathroom. Just to reassure the poor girl, Alice offered her a kind smile, "Hi Jane."

"Hi – hi." Jane stuttered, caught completely off guard.

Then Alice turned back around to place her biology text book on the table in front of her, and because of her high vampire senses, she caught something she wasn't suppose to see; behind her, Jane was urging Helena on to go talk to her, gesturing wildly while mouthing something. Alice bit her lip to hide another giggle, and ten seconds later, Helena had left her desk and went around the other tables to stand in front of Alice's.

In that position, Alice felt ever smaller than usual, but luckily she had Renesmee and Bella there to make Helena feel pretty small too, because they both shot her killer-looks (Bella's was more evolved than Renesmee's – the young one wasn't quite as threatening as her mother).

"Can we help you with something?" Bella coldly asked her.

Even if Helena seemed a bit taken aback, she did a good job not showing it completely. She placed a hand on Alice's desk and offered them a confident smile, "I'm just gonna talk to Alice." she quickly stated.

Alice cocked an eyebrow, "Yes?"

"I was wondering if-"

Then cut her off, "_No_."

Helena looked surprised, "How do you know what I'm gonna say?"

Alice shot her a sugar-sweet smile, "You were going to ask me if I wanted to go out with you. And the answer is no. No, I don't."

Helena didn't say anything for a second. She'd already made it pretty clear last week that she thought Alice was fine, but she hadn't really done anything about it yet. But she knew that Alice knew what she thought of her, and therefore she probably didn't want to deny anything – at least that was how Alice read the thinking lines across her forehead, and the confusion in her eyes.

"Don't know what to say, huh?" Bella asked her in a sharp voice.

Helena completely ignored her this time, as if she wasn't even there, "Why not? I assure you, I'm a good date."

"It's just a no." Alice said, and then she reached for her pen just to make it pretty clear that the conversation was over. She knew that Helena probably wouldn't give up yet, and that was okay with her. She liked teasing her.

Renesmee spoke up next, when Helena didn't move, "You can go now." she said, and waved her off with both hands and a cheeky grin.

Helena sighed heavily and went to find her own seat, and Alice felt pretty good about herself. It was a long time since she'd even thought about something like this. Of course it'd never happen, and she wasn't interested in that, but it was still nice to pretend that she could date whoever she wanted to, and that she wasn't a widow.

Bella growled next to her before she reached for her book and stuck her nose into it. Renesmee wasn't bothered in the same way that her mother was – not at all. She, on the other hand, found it slightly funny. She turned to Alice then, the smile reaching all the way into her eyes, "You've got yourself an admirer!" she lowly sang.

Alice blinked at her, but didn't say a word.

"Do you like her?" she continued, sneaking a glance behind to see what Helena and Jane were up to.

Alice shook her head at her, "No, Nessie, I do not like her." she said. And it _was_ the truth, though she had to admit that it felt good to be desired like that.

"Just makin' sure." the curly-head finished, before she turned around to face the front of the class, just as their teacher came into the classroom, in a complete rush, just like usual. Alice had pretty quickly learned that Mr. Russ was always late and/or confused, and he was usually forgetting things all over the place too. But he was a happy teacher, with a smile on his face, and that helped her focus in class, too. She actually quite enjoyed his classes.

"Hello everyone!" Mr. Russ cheered, placing his faithful coffee mug on his desk, and after that he unloaded all his papers onto the desk too with a satisfied smile to the entire class. "I've got exciting plans for us!" he cheerfully continued, "We're starting group projects from this week and three weeks forth, and _you_ get to pick your own partners!"

The class broke into a mumble of happy agreement; it was always much nicer to choose one's own partner, because some people are just horrible to work with.

Mr. Russ continued, "You'll be in groups of two or three, and you come to me, and I'll assign you your subject. This will be graded, of course. Doesn't this just sound fun, huh? _Huh?_" he finished off by wriggling his eyebrows in a suggestive manner, and Alice couldn't help but laugh to herself. She'd had a lot (and that really was a lot) of teacher's in her time, but she'd never quite been taught by one like Mr. Russ – he was some of something.

Bella leaned slightly to the side and gently whispered, "We're partners, right?"

Alice didn't reply, because Renesmee leaned in from the other side, "Of course! I'm sure whatever it is, we can dig something out from one of our former assignments. At some point, we must have done whatever he wants us to do!"

It was always so easy with homework and assignments. One of the family members had always done something like it, and whatever they all handed in, it was perfect. They'd lived to gather plenty of information, and their assignments had been handed in and returned enough times to make sure there were no mistakes in them. They all got straight A's, which really made up for their lack of attendance in PE.

Bella leaned back to sit straight when that was the deal. Behind her, Alice could hear the entire class trying to find partners, but it didn't sound like Helena wanted to pair up with Jane like usual. It sounded like she had other plans. Alice wasn't quite sure what to think of those plans, though.

"So by tomorrow," Mr. Russ continued, "I'll expect everyone to have a partner, and today we'll finish last week's subject – _osmosis_."

And as he started up his lesson, Alice leaned back in her seat, her pen placed on her paper, and with her thoughts completely elsewhere, she let her hand doodle whatever it wanted to.

Maybe she should have a little fun with Helena?

-

Alice was casually pretending to actually eat something at lunch (she had a bottled water and a salad in front of her) with her siblings; Emmett and Rosalie were in a heavy discussion about this and that, and Renesmee was talking to Jacob on the phone; she still missed him like crazy when they were at school, because they didn't see each other there. Alice was glancing at nothing in particular, but she was aware of the fact that Bella was studying her with curious eyes.

She really wanted to ask her what was wrong with her, what she was thinking about, and so on, but for some reason she didn't really know what to say. Bella was just acting weird today, and it was sort of freaking her out.

"You've got to be kiddin' me..." Bella grumbled, and Alice turned her head in surprise, to see what bothered Bella this time. She quickly found the source, and it was none other than Helena; she'd just raised from her seat among her friends, and was walking in this direction. "Doesn't she ever give up?"

Alice had to agree with Bella on that one – of course the 'fun' part of her plan wouldn't really be 'fun' if Helena gave up like that, but it was highly amusing to watch her bounce back so quickly. Rosalie and Emmett turned their heads to see what was going on, and Renesmee hurriedly made an excuse to Jacob and hung up the phone too.

"What's going on?" Rosalie demanded to know, her voice cold as it swept across the table in her icy tone. Her eyes lit fire in Alice's direction, but Renesmee answered for her, like it was no big deal,

"The human who has a crush on Alice – she will not leave her alone."

And at this, Emmett burst out laughing, while Rosalie hissed from the back of her throat, "A human!?" she gritted her teeth, "We've been through that once before, it's not pretty. _Alice_!"

"I'm not even interested in her!" Alice defended herself, actually quite offended that they'd presume something like that at this point, "I still think about Jasper, and I've told her no plenty of times!"

"Well, be ready to tell her no again, because here she comes!" Bella firmly told her and placed her left hand on Emmett's mouth to keep him from laughing further, just the second as Helena stopped in front of them. She had an apple in one hand, and a juice box in the other.

"Does she think she can sit here?" Rosalie lowly hissed, so quick and low so only the vampires could hear, and Helena didn't suspect a thing. She didn't expect a reply, though, she turned her head to Helena, and pushed her hair back, putting on her snobby look, "Something you wanted?"

Helena didn't dare to look her in the eyes, "I was just wondering if I could sit here." she said, and like Rosalie, she didn't wait for a reply – she did have guts, Alice had to admit that. She grabbed a spare chair from the table next to theirs and pulled it to their table, sitting right across from Alice.

Emmett was almost bursting.

Renesmee shot Helena a charming smile, "You enjoying your lunch?" she asked her, "Alice was just saying that she's not so hungry today, do you want her fries instead?" she pushed the none-touched plate of fries across the table and placed it next to the apple and the juice box Helena had just placed there.

Helena did not look phased at all, and grabbed a fry immediately, "Thank you." she mumbled as she chewed it. She reached for her apple and held it out for Alice to take, "Since you're not eating fries, you want my apple?"

Alice barely looked at the apple or her, "The last time the snake offered, everything went horribly wrong, remember?"

Again, Emmett chuckled, but this time he was joined by Bella.

Helena took it like a man and placed her apple on the table again, "Adam and Eve? Clever!" she replied back to her in a simple tone. "I'm not a snake though."

Alice couldn't help but smile, "Can't speak for your statement, but I am pretty clever."

"Did you want anything in particular?" Rosalie said again, pretty eager to get Helena off their case. Alice knew how she felt about interacting with humans; she didn't like it at all. It was like back when Bella had moved to Forks – it had been hell at home, trying to convince Rosalie that they should let Bella live and not snap her neck. Luckily for them they had succeeded, and now Rosalie had actually started to like Bella; things were moving _slowly_ forward.

Helena completely ignored her question, and looked at Alice instead, "Why don't you want to go out with me?" she bluntly asked her.

Alice simply shrugged her shoulders, "I just don't."

"Ya' not gay or what?" Helena continued to bluntly squeeze out of her; she had this weird hopeful glint in her eye, and Alice didn't know why, but she almost felt sorry for her right that second.

The pixie looked straight at her, determined not to answer that question with a 'yes' or a 'no'. "I'm not into labels." she shortly told her.

"But-"

Alice continued, "And I just got out of a very long relationship, so just drop it."

But Helena didn't drop it; she continued to hold it right there between her hands, "Okay, okay, I get it, you're still crushed because you broke up with someone else, _but_-" she empathized the 'but' with as much pressure as possible, "you should still think about it. You say you're not into labels, but if you don't wanna date me, it makes me question that, don't you see? You simply need to go on a date with me, or my entire belief system will be in jeopardy."

Alice cocked an eyebrow in amusement and she could hear Rosalie mumble something along the lines of 'Christ! Get a life, weirdo!' beneath her breath, while Bella was just staring the human down. "Look, if you care enough to make up all that load of crap, I'll evaporate a bit for you – _No_, Helena, I don't wanna date you. And it's not because I'm gay or I'm straight, I don't even care if I'm gay or not, I go with the flow, but I still don't wanna date you. Just please don't go around telling people what I am and am not." Alice said to her in a firm voice, and as she glanced around the table, she continued, "What type of person would I be if I labelled people? If I thought that Rose was stupid because she's blonde, or if I thought that you had a temper, because you're a redhead."

_Or if I judged Jacob because he's a werewolf, or he judged us because we're vampires, _she mentally added.

Helena sighed heavily and drummed her fingers briefly against the table, "Alright," she said and pushed her chair back with a hurt look in her eyes, "I think I get your point."

Alice stopped her, as she turned to leave, "I will be your partner, though."

Helena paused, her back to them. "You will?"

"In biology." Alice continued, knowing she'd have to explain quite a few things to not only Bella and Renesmee, but also the other Cullens, "I'll be your partner in biology."

Helena didn't say more, before she kept on walking back to their table, but Alice knew that she was dancing inwardly, and that she hadn't given up yet. She glanced back to them as she took a seat and Alice winked at her.

Bella placed a hand on her arm and squeezed, "What's that about? We're partners."

"Yeah, Alice," Rosalie added and raised an eyebrow in anger, "_what's that about_?"

Alice softly pushed Bella's hand off of her and gave them both a look, "Jeez, calm down, guys! She's just my partner, maybe she really wanted to work with me."

"Yeah," Bella said back to her with that certain look of hers, "and maybe you're playing her like a cello."

"What the fuck are you doing, Alice?" Renesmee lowly whined, but by the look Bella shot her, she quickly corrected herself, "I mean _whatever_ are you doing, Alice? There was no 'fuck' in that sentence, you happy now, _Mom_?" she threw the last part in Bella's direction with a firm look.

Bella offered her a strained smile, "Ecstatic." she replied, before she turned back to Alice with an expectant look.

Alice couldn't help but be amused by the reactions from her family. It wasn't like she was going to blow their secret by working with her. One or two days of hard work and their project would be over. It'd take her minds off things too. She had so much time in one day, and anything she could do not to think about Jasper was good. It wasn't like she was going to go ahead and fall for the human; no! No, she simply planned to have fun and live a little.

The bell rang, and the five Cullens stood up to get to their next classes. Emmett barely had to lift his arm when he went to teasingly ruffle Alice's hair, "My little Allie-Callie has got herself a not-so-secret admirer!" he teased it with a low laugh.

Alice looked up at him, "Shut up, Emmett."

"Don't worry about it, sis, I think it's good for you." he told her, as they went down the hallway in a painfully slow pace, trying not to walk faster than the humans, "You need to get back in the game, just for fun. Bella should try too."

Rosalie hit him on the arm, just as Bella hissed, "I heard that, Emmett!"

And Alice had to agree with him. If she ever wanted to feel completely happy again, feel free and not so empty, she'd have to get back in the game – she would have to find another mate. Someday.

For now she was just going to have fun, though.  


* * *

_I'm deeply sorry about the delay with this chapter, I really wanted to get it written, but so many things came up and I've been so busy – I hope you can forgive me and that it was worth the wait. _

_Thank you so much for the reviews for last chapter; they totally made me smile, I love them! _

_So, in this chapter I was trying to create a bit of closeness between Alice and Bella – it has nothing to do with romantic love just yet, but they've always been close, I'm just trying to get that back after what happened to them. Plus, I've created a little threat to the future romance between them. I thought it'd add a little colour to the story, or what do you think? I'll have more of Esme & Carlisle and Jacob in the next chapter, if I stick to my plans. _

_**Disclaimer; **I don't own Twilight. _


	6. Chapter Six

**Chapter Six**

She had seen it coming for days now. The visions kept changing, but she definitely knew that it was coming. They kept changing their minds, deciding otherwise, but no matter how many times it became different, it always ended the same. They were going to talk to her.

She couldn't see what they wanted to talk to her about. That wasn't clear to her. But she could see that they wanted to speak with her – both of them – and it worried her a bit because it seemed serious. No matter what happened, they were going to have a talk, and all she could do was wait it out.

When would it be? When were they going to summon her down the hall?

It was sooner than she'd expected.

"Alice?"

The small pixie-like vampire turned around on her office chair to find Bella in the doorway. She offered her best friend a warm smile, but she didn't get much in return. The other vampire had been a bit cold lately, and Alice wasn't sure why that was, but she hoped that Bella was going to get back to normal soon. It wasn't fun having no one to talk to during those long nights. Rosalie had Emmett, Esme had Carlisle and Renesmee had Jacob. The only ones left were her and Bella, and they usually entertained one another, but the past few days, Bella had retired to her room with a book.

For some oddly weird reason.

"Hi Bella." Alice sang, her voice barely making it across the room to the excellent ears of Bella Cullen.

Bella didn't reply to her enthusiasm, "Carlisle and Esme want to see you in his office."

And so that was the time, Alice concluded, when she stood up and floated across the room on her lithe feet. Bella had already fled the doorway, leaving Alice to herself once more. After she dealt with Carlisle and Esme, she was going to have to deal with Bella – it was actually pissing her off that she was treating her like this.

And for no apparent reason, on top of it.

Alice stopped in front of Carlisle's office and politely knocked on his door (which didn't happen too often, if she had to be honest). She could hear a faint 'come in' through the wood and pushed the door open. Carlisle was sitting behind his desk, like usually, and Esme was sitting on a chair by the side. One spare chair was next to her, and presuming that it was there for her to sit on, Alice crossed the floor and did just that.

Carlisle folded his hands in his usually observant way while Alice crossed her legs in anticipation, "So we finally decided to talk to you." he commented in his calm voice, and Esme reached a hand across the table and placed it upon his folded ones.

Alice offered him a crooked smile, "Yeah, you've been driving me nuts. You kept changing your minds. What's this about?" she asked them, her curiosity getting the best of her; there was no way she could be patient and wait for them to get there on their own.

Esme smiled to Alice in the characteristic way of hers that always made Alice sure that everything was going to be okay, "We just wanted to talk to you about everything." she lowly said, "With school.. how you're – feeling?"

Alice had had a feeling that maybe that was what this was about, but she had been no near certain enough to actually bet on it. So she hadn't really prepared an answer in case that was it. She now regretted that. "I'm okay..." she trailed off, supporting her statement with a shrug of her shoulders.

"Well, you seem better." Esme positively tried to urge her on. Her smile was infectious, and Alice couldn't help but smile as well.

"School has been good for me." the little vampire said, looking at the two people she respected more than anything; the two people she could confide in like no others in times of need, "It gives me other things to think about, and it brings a little more vivacity into my life. It's been great."

Carlisle smiled as well, "We're happy to hear so, Alice."

Alice winked in return.

Esme was a bit hesitant when she spoke again, "Nessie tells us that you've... you've met a – a girl?"

It took a second for Alice to realize what Esme had just told her, but when she did, it actually felt like she wanted to laugh and scream at the same time. A part of her – and that was perhaps the most dominant part – thought that it was hilariously funny that Renesmee had told her parents that she'd met a girl, but the other part of her was extremely offended and mad that they'd even think such a thing.

When Alice had completely figured out what was the proper reaction for that comment, she opened her mouth to speak, "So Renesmee has told you that, huh?" she giggled, "I haven't 'met'-" air quotes were appropriate here, "-a girl... but – there's a girl in our biology class who's very much into me."

Carlisle nodded his head as if he didn't know what to say to that, and Alice could hear Esme swallow loudly, before she nodded her head as well.

"There's nothing in it." she quickly reassured them – just in case they were worried.

"It's okay." Carlisle responded, but he seemed more than relieved, "It's not that... that we don't want you to find another mate, Alice, it's just that – another human may not be the best idea at this time."

"But it's totally okay if you find a female mate." Esme added, and Alice thought that she saw a bit desperation in her eyes, but wasn't entirely sure.

Alice cracked another smile, "I'm no near interested in finding another mate, let alone a human."

They both looked extremely relieved.

Alice continued with a shrug, "I've decided to partner up with her in biology though, I think it'll be good for me. But you don't need to worry about me dating her. She's not really – my type." she finished off with a nose-wrinkle for good measure, and Esme held a hand in front of her mouth to hide her giggle.

Carlisle blinked at her, "Well that's good to know, thank you Alice."

"Just be careful." Esme added, the mother in her taking over once more. But she didn't need to tell Alice that; of course she was going to be careful. Being around humans she always had to be careful. Firstly, there was the entire deal where she really didn't want to attack them, but secondly, she just didn't want to expose their secret.

"I will." Alice said, and with a little jump, she was on her feet again, "That all?" she questioned – she was eager to get out of there; she had a little bone to pick with Renesmee. She was such a tattle tail sometimes. Alice wasn't mad, far from, because she was often like that herself – she did live to gossip – but she was still going to mention it to her niece, because that was just the way she was.

Carlisle gave her a short nod, "That's all."

Alice didn't say more; she turned around and hurried out of there, closing the door soundlessly behind her. She paused for a second, alone in the long hallway and tried to locate Renesmee. She was in the backyard.... alone. Perfect. With a sneaky smile, Alice raced through the house, carefully not knocking anything over, and stopped in front of Renesmee, taking the girl by surprise; she'd been completely into her book and hadn't heard a thing.

"Fuck, Alice, you scared me!" the curly-head whined, as she closed her book and stood up from the grass where she'd been sitting against the trunk of a tree.

Alice grinned mercilessly at her, "Now, be careful, or I'm gonna tell your mother that you cursed!" she teased her, referring to how Bella always corrected Renesmee when she cursed. Not that Renesmee would ever obey her like that unless she was right in front of her.

Renesmee stuck her tongue out at her, "You wouldn't!"

Alice made a face and put both hands in her sides, because that was the only way she could seem somewhat intimidating in front of her niece. Renesmee was so much taller than her (but then again, wasn't everybody?), and it was hard to be serious towards her, "I'm gonna tell her something _alright_."

Renesmee chuckled, apparently she did not take it very seriously, "What happened now?"

"I hear you told Carlisle and Esme about _Helena_." Alice seriously pointed out.

Renesmee immediately got a guilty look on her face and took a step back. "Whoops." was her only – lame – response.

Alice followed her by taking two steps forward, "So you tell on me, I tell on you, is that not the deal? Unless you have a very good explanation for this."

Renesmee held out her hand, "Touch it." she said, and Alice just stared at it, knowing very well that this was too much for Renesmee to explain with words; she was going to use her gift instead. It happened sometimes that she'd need to show other people what had happened or what she was thinking; she couldn't always deal with it through words, though Alice usually preferred to actually talk to her. Most people did, and Renesmee had gotten a lot better after all these years of having to talk to humans.

Alice shook her head, "I'm not gonna _see_ why you did it! Explain it to me, Nessie."

Renesmee groaned and stomped her foot angrily. "We were talking about school." she said, looking at Alice through her thick lashes; her eyes were almost closed, and she looked gorgeous in the faint light from the sun that was almost setting, "And – and they were asking how everything was going, and I showed Esme what was on my mind, and she, Helena just-" she paused and stretched her fingers as if to point out just exactly how Helena had just, "-_popped_ in there!" she finished.

Alice squeezed her eyes tightly together in disbelief, "_Popped in there_?"

Renesmee nodded her head up and down multiple times, as if it would convince Alice more if she was continuously did so.

"That's not cool, Renesmee."

"No, it's not."

"It's really not cool. How could you do that to me?"

"I'm not sure."

"_Not_ your story to tell."

"I know."

"It's nothing. You should have kept it to yourself."

"I know."

"Do you?"

"_I know_."

Alice paused and stared up at her niece again. It was getting harder and harder to act upset with her when she was this adorable. She'd never been the tough aunt, she'd always been a cool aunt, and getting mad was so not cool. She cracked a smile and Renesmee looked very relieved. "Maybe you should be more concerned about your own stories to tell."

Renesmee got those cute wrinkles on her forehead that she'd inherited from Bella when she was confused, "What story?"

Alice winked at her, "The one about all the cute guys that want to get into your pants at school."

Renesmee had barely had time to open her mouth to tease her back, when a voice was heard behind them.

"_Repeat_ that?!

The two girls turned around on their feet, only to find Jacob standing there, disbelief written across his gorgeous face. Alice could feel Renesmee freeze completely next to her, and though the situation was quite serious (she never meant for Jacob to hear how she'd phrased the 'in your pants'-part), she couldn't help but crack a small smile.

_Wonder how Renesmee's going to get out of this one! _she sang to herself, before she stuck her hands into the pockets of her jeans and said, "Well, I'm gonna leave you to it!"

Renesmee growled lowly next to her and Jacob was still staring at his mate, when Alice danced pass him and into the house, through the kitchen door.

She was pretty glad that she wasn't Renesmee right now. She'd got quite the explaining to do.

-

It had been quite amusing to witness the following conversation (or perhaps it had been argument?) between Renesmee and Jacob. It wasn't like she'd been prying and tried to listen in, but it had been pretty hard not to miss their 'talk'. Jacob had been pretty upset, and while Renesmee had done her best to calm him down and reassure him that there was nothing in it, he'd not been happy.

Everyone in their household had heard them. It had been impossible not to.

And Renesmee – who actually did need rest at times – looked more worn-out than Alice had seen her in many years, as they were sitting in their English class, discussing the importance of the work by Oscar Wilde. Right now they were talking about _The Importance of Being Earnest_,which was a book that Alice had read multiple times throughout her entire existence. She'd barely needed to read it this time, but something had been different. She'd looked through her notes for something clever to say in class, but the story had never caught her like it had this time. It had never meant as much to her as it did now. And that was because something had changed.

"Oscar Wilde wrote openly about several conflicts in the society at that time," Bella cleverly said next to her, the entire class turning her way to watch her as she spoke, "like... the church, politics, and so forth. It was important for him to raise discussions with his work, and this is also his most popular play, though his last one."

"That's very good, that's very good, Bella!" their teacher, Mrs. Benson, a very serious and plain old woman, urged her on, a huge smile on her face. Most of the time she was a horrible teacher to be taught by, but when they discussed books from the Victorian time, she was unstoppable. This time in particular had always interested her, and therefore they probably read more novels and plays from that period that necessary. "And how did he discuss the church? There's a very specific thing in the play about that."

Renesmee took a look around the classroom to see if any of their fellow students had brain enough to see that, but apparently none of them did, so she felt compelled to answer, and raised her hand.

Mrs. Benson's face lit up, "Nessie?"

"He mocked the church."

"How so?"

Renesmee sighed heavily, "In the play, Doctor Chasuble prefers to christen people when they're grown-ups, he says. And that wasn't okay in Victorian time."

Mrs. Benson's face lit up even further, "Very good!" she cheered and quickly scribbled everything across the blackboard so the other students could get some notes. "And what's special about Doctor Chasuble?"

"His name." Renesmee replied and held back a yawn. Alice held back her grin instead because this was boring stuff for her niece, for not only hadn't she rested, but she'd been through it so many times before.

Alice though, she was flipping through her book, only half-listening to the discussion in class. She had to make sure about this before she raised her hand – unless, of course, Mrs. Benson asked them about it, then she'd just raise her hand and answer.

Bella took over for Renesmee, "A chasuble – it's a priest's gown."

Mrs. Benson smiled again, but at least she didn't say 'very good, very good!', before she wrote across the blackboard again, pieces of chalk flying everywhere because of her eagerness. "Other names like that?" she asked them, and her face showed true surprise, when Jane, who was in the row right in front of Alice (next to Helena, who apparently had this class as well), raised her hand.

"Jane?" Mrs. Benson questioned, truly not sure if that was, in fact, the name of one of her students.

Jane nodded, "Well, Miss Prism, you see. It could be interpreted as misprision, and if that's the case – it's a pun." she paused to see what effect her words would have on their teacher, but quickly continued, "It was just something I noticed anyway, I mean, if it's the case, then she's not very colourful."

"Very good! Very good, Jane!" Mrs. Benson said, and this time she wrote so fast, that the bun on top of her head bounced up and down as she moved her arm; several students hid behind their books to laugh.

Alice raised her hand, not sure if she really wanted to go there, but it was the only thing she'd been thinking about since she went through her notes – it was the one thing that had caught her attention this time, and it wasn't like it helped her more in her confusion, "Can I say something, Mrs. Benson?"

Mrs. Benson nodded her along with a smile on her face.

"Well, back to what Bella said," Alice started and placed her finger in her book at no exact place, "she was talking about the things that Oscar Wilde wrote openly about, and I just couldn't help but wonder... Oscar Wilde was gay, right? So he disguised the conflict of homosexuality, didn't he?"

This seemed to catch Mrs. Benson's attention, but also several others'. Helena, in particular, seemed to flinch in her seat and listen more carefully.

"That's true Alice, very well seen, and why was that?"

Alice squeezed her eyes together in thought for a second, "Well, it was really frowned upon in those days, no one was out. Homosexuality was compared to other things, such as..." she searched for a good word, and eventually found one, "_sodomy_."

"Very good, Alice!" Mrs. Benson said, and many people in the class mumbled along with her, knowing exactly what she was going to say before she said it. "And why is that interesting?"

"Well, the character in his play was somewhat of a womanthrope – as he put it himself." Bella quickly answered for her, catching Alice completely off guard. Her voice seemed strained, and she didn't look to Alice's side once.

Mrs. Benson smiled at them – it was clear that she didn't mind whoever of the three of them who spoke, as long as one of them did, because she considered the three of them the only students actually smart enough to study the work of Oscar Wilde. "And what, exactly, is a womanthrope? Can you enlighten your fellow students?"

"Someone who dislikes women." Renesmee quickly replied, not once stopping to even think about it.

"Well, I'm not womanthrope." Helena loudly announced in front of them and turned around on her chair, giving Alice a very obvious wink, which only seemed to tick Bella off even more;

"Then it's a good thing that this isn't about you!" she hissed at the redhead, and Mrs. Benson stared at them, clearly afraid that their bickering would lead to something more, because she was not prepared to handle that. Luckily for her, she didn't have to, because the bell rang, announcing the end of their school day.

"We'll talk more about the characters next time!" she tried to tell them through the noise of chairs being pushed back, bags being zipped and people chatting away, happy that they made it through one more day at this hell hole.

Bella left the classroom before either Alice or Renesmee had time to pack their things together, and Renesmee turned to Alice with a questionable look. "Did you do something to tick her off?" she wondered.

Alice stared at the doorway Bella had just gone through and shook her head, "I'm not sure." she whispered, and that really was the truth – she couldn't see why Bella would be so upset with her. It was actually starting to worry her more than anything, and that said a lot.

Apparently Helena had to hurry to work so she didn't linger around to try and talk to her today, which really relieved Alice; she was not up for a discussion with her about homosexuality after what just went down in class, so her and Renesmee went into the hallway and towards the front door, following the throng of people, all zipping up their jackets to save themselves from the heaving wind outside. Luckily it didn't rain today, but it was still freezing cold.

However, as they reached the front door, someone was blocking it, and a line was forming, the people in the back, jumping up and down to see what was going on. Alice didn't even try to catch a glimpse, she knew she was too small, and Renesmee wasn't the tallest person either, so she gave up as well. Rosalie and Emmett joined them after their last class, thought and Rosalie placed a hand on Alice's shoulder,

"What's going on?" she demanded to know, trying to look above the other students' heads as well, but it was really tough to catch a glimpse at what was going on.

Emmett's eyes went wide when he looked outside, "Hell no!" he chipped, and before anyone could say another thing, he'd hollered, "Move away people, coming through!" he told them, and no one dared not obey him, so they all stepped aside, and the three girls followed him outside, only to find the source of all this hassle.

In the middle of the parking lot was no other than Jacob, perked on top of his motorcycle, with a mess of people around him, trying to see it; all in awe. Bella was standing by her car in the other end of the parking lot, her arms crossed and with a sour look across her face. She was clearly not happy with this.

"Nessie!" Jacob cheered and gave them all a wave.

The other kids turned to look at them as they made their way towards him, and something seemed to click for the guys – Jacob was Renesmee's _boyfriend_. He did exist, for sure.

"Hi!" Renesmee's happiness couldn't be disguised; she was probably just really glad that he wasn't mad at her any longer. She greeted him with a warm kiss, "What are you doing here, Jacob?"

Jacob smiled his heartbreaking smile to her, "I'm just picking up my lady, is that illegal now?" he wanted to know, but the smile reached all the way into his eyes.

"Hello dog." Rosalie said, and then turned to Renesmee, "Careful on the way home, I don't trust his driving skills."

Renesmee rolled her eyes at her, and Rosalie and Emmett left to get to their car. Alice hugged both Renesmee and Jacob goodbye, "Have fun!" she said, knowing very well that they'd go for a long ride around town; Jacob needed to show these guys that Renesmee was taken, and Alice didn't blame him.

"We'll see you at home, Alice." Jacob replied, before they both got on the motorcycle and left the school parking lot.

Alice turned to look at Bella, who was now getting into the car. Oh crap. She'd have to ride alone home with her.

-

There was a knock on her door, and Alice turned over on her bed, where she'd been lying on her back, reading through _The Importance of Being Earnest _only for her own enjoyment, and to see if she could catch all Oscar Wilde's small hints; it was quite amusing actually, and what else could she do with her time? Everyone else were busy with their mates, and she didn't dare to talk to Bella.

She kind of wanted Bella to come to her, may it burst or not.

"Come inside, Rosalie." Alice said, knowing for sure that it would be her beautiful sister outside; she'd seen earlier that Rosalie would come to talk to her, she just wasn't sure why and what about exactly, just that it would happen.

Rosalie opened the door and peeked inside, a shy smile across her face, "I've been sent to talk to you." she said, and stepped fully inside, closing the door behind her. She stepped carefully across the floor and sat down on the bed, right next to Alice's knees, placing thoughtful hand on her her thigh.

Alice turned onto her side, so her front was towards Rosalie's and placed her book on her night stand with the backside up. She offered Rosalie a small smile and perked her lips, "About what?"

"We all took a _vote_." Rosalie continued in a sharp, yet kind voice. Her hand kept stroking Alice's thigh, "Well, some of us did, and – and they said that I had to talk to you about this thing with that _human_." she spat the last part of it out, a slight hint of a sneer in her voice.

Alice didn't particularly like the sound of this, but her curiosity was already getting the best of her, "Did Bella take a vote?" she questioned, because she had thought – that was the most likely option – that Bella would have been the one to come talk to her. Not Rosalie.

Rosalie hesitated slightly, and Alice did not like the sound of that, "Nah, she..." there was a sigh, "she said she didn't want to interfere, and that she didn't really care."

Alice bit her lip, "I don't get what I've done to her."

Rosalie shrugged and her hand stopped moving, to lie gently on the mattress next to her, "I don't either, but I think she's just really upset lately. I don't think that it's you in particular, she snaps at Renesmee too."

Alice nodded in understanding, but it didn't make her worry any less. "So what's this about Helena? You worried or something?"

Rosalie seemed to think about it for a few seconds before she answered, "We're just concerned because you're spending more time with her – _and_ she seems to really like you. We're just not sure whether or not it's a good idea – we don't need that right now. We've been through enough already."

Alice was quiet for a few seconds as she let Rosalie's words sink in completely. She could see their point of view; they didn't want to risk anything at this point, they just needed to find themselves completely. But she also could not see what the big deal was. She was just hanging around a girl she actually thought was pretty great. It didn't mean that it had to turn into anything more than simply just that. They didn't need to concern themselves with her business. She could handle it.

Rosalie placed her hand on Alice's cheek and stroked it gently, "Would you say something, sweetie?"

Alice looked up at her and locked their eyes; it was nice to look into a familiar face, someone she knew she could trust no matter what, "I don't know what to say, Rose. I'm not concerned like you are. I like just being with Helena," she tried to explain, hoped that she'd understand her, "it gives me a break, y'know? It gives me a break from our world and all the bad memories."

Rosalie's hand dropped once more, "You hopefully don't have all bad memories of us." she commented on, trying to disguise how hurt she felt at the thought.

Alice shook her head, black, spiky hair whipping all around her, "I don't. But I have memories that I don't want to think about, because they're painful. I just sometimes need to clear my head."

Rosalie didn't reply to that, but seemed to take in everything she'd said, pretty much like Alice had just done before.

"Now you say something." Alice lowly pleaded her.

Rosalie offered her a small, insecure smile, "So you don't like her?"

Alice quickly shook her head; she didn't like her, and she'd told her so many times before. "No. I don't." she mumbled, "I don't like anyone right now. When I find someone, it's going to be my next true love."

"But is that a woman?" Rosalie curiously asked her, one eyebrow perked into the curtain of her hair. It seemed to bring her great trouble to mention this, she definitely had to cross some boundaries, Alice was sure of that, but she could also see that she was dying to know the answers to some of the questions she'd been thinking about.

Alice chuckled lowly and slapped her gently across the arm, "You really curious about that, huh?"

"If one of my sisters is gay, then I wanna know!" Rosalie defended herself in a high-pitched tone that could almost compete with Alice's normal voice.

Alice laughed at her and turned onto her back again, staring straight into the ceiling; she'd been wondering about that too, about the question of gay and straight, and women and men. It was confusing, but it was a subject she couldn't keep away from, not after Helena had entered her life and trigged something within her.

It would be so much easier... so much freer, to be with a woman. It'd relieve her from a lot of memories she didn't want to think about, and it'd be different. She wouldn't have to worry about Jasper, wouldn't feel the need to compare him and the new guy, to put Jasper into the picture no matter what. If she was with a woman, she could start all over, and Jasper would always be a part of her memory, and part of her past, but it would be easier to move and try to live her life fully with the people she loves.

"...Alice?"

Rosalie, who had been quiet until now, letting Alice wallow in her thoughts, finally broke though her shell and awoke her. She was glancing down at her, a worried look in her hazel eyes, and Alice thought that she looked so beautiful.

"Are you … gay?"

"That's the thing," Alice said and nudged her gently in the side with her knee, "as from now on, I'm not really sure."

* * *

_I apologise for the delay and for the length of this chapter. I know it's shorter than my usual chapters, but it's what I had planned anyway ;) I really hope that you liked it, I put a lot of effort into it, and started writing during class, because that's the only time I actually felt like I could manage it. _

_I hope I wrote Alice's confusion out a bit more, and of course that could not have been done without the good help of my __awesome 'friend' Oscar Wilde. His plays are genius, they totally are. _

_Credits for Jacob's stunt with the motorcycle goes to swwblackhawk who gave me the idea of how to confront Renesmee with it and solve the problem, I'd been a little worried about how I'd do that exactly, so that lifted a huge weight off my shoulders. _

_I'm not sure when next chapter will be up, because there's the school play next week which keeps me in school for hours, but I'll try to hurry with the next update. The bright side – during play there won't be any day-to-day homework, so that's plus. _

_Thank you so much for the nice reviews for last chapter, you know they keep me writing these days. Please tell me what you think of this chapter too – it'd mean a lot to me. _

_**Disclaimer; **I don't own Twilight or Oscar Wilde's The Importance of Being Earnest. _


	7. Chapter Seven

**Chapter Seven **

Things were slowly changing in the Cullen household and Alice wasn't sure if she liked it entirely. There was a weird feeling in the air, and she felt like she was almost suffocated by the tightness, she thought that perhaps it would be appropriate to whiff out one of those rarely used knives from the kitchen and pretend to cut the air into pieces.

It was hard to say why everything was so different lately. The change couldn't be seen on any of her family members' faces; it was unspoken, it was something rare, and Alice figured perhaps it was because of Bella.

It had been a long time since Bella had been seen so sad. It was right when Edward was gone, she'd been devastated, of course, and no one had questioned that, because they hadn't expected differently. But the reason for her sombreness was this time unclear. It couldn't be the memory of Edward coming back to haunt her, because it seemed different from last time. But her mood was affecting the entire residence, and some people had troubles keeping their frustrations about it to themselves.

Rosalie would often voice her opinion, and after that she'd be scolded on by Esme, and Emmett would laugh, and Bella would leave the room.

And Alice herself, she would gape at them with open mouth and try to understand what was happening and why it was happening now – of all times – when she finally felt better.

She couldn't really concentrate in school. Not that it mattered anyway, because she excelled in everything she did school wise, but it still wasn't a nice feeling to be caught staring out the window during class, when she was supposed to be taking notes. She just couldn't help herself, because it was seriously hard to think of other things when Bella was everything on her mind. She was simply there _all_ the time, no lie. And it wasn't like there were some times when she could be free from those thoughts, because she was awake pretty much all 24 hours of the day. Even when she was hunting, showering, playing games with Emmett, working on her project with Helena...

"Alice!"

Alice snapped out of it and turned her head to the side, only to find Helena staring at her with wide open mouth and huge curious eyes. Her red hair framed her face and she looked quite beautiful in the light coming from outside, where the sun was slowly disappearing behind buildings in west, while the colour of the sky was getting darker by the second.

The lithe vampire blinked a few times, "I'm sorry." she mumbled, shaking her head to herself, jet-black hair flying all around her, like an unbreakable circle of life. It whipped against the sides of her face and she blinked again to make sure that she hadn't gone blind.

Helena wrinkled her nose, "Are you OK? You're so out of it today." she questioned, clearly concerned, that was evident in her voice.

Making up a quick excuse, Alice stared at her laptop while she answered, "I didn't sleep much last night." she stared up at Helena then and faked a yawn for good measure.

Helena cringed in understanding, "Trouble in paradise?"

"Yeah-" Alice cut herself off, not sure what she should or shouldn't say, so she just quickly figured out an ending that wasn't for from the truth (because she didn't want to lie), but still didn't reveal anything, "-it's nothing, really, it's just- we're, we're so many people and sometimes arguments happen, y'know?"

Helena nodded, "Yeah. It's just me and Mom here, but we fight enough. I wouldn't want to live in a house with four other teenagers."

Without knowing it, Helena had pretty much hit the nail right on the head, but Alice wasn't about to tell her that. She leaned back in the couch in stead and placed her laptop against her knees, "It's not so bad, actually. You're never bored with Emmett around, and you've always got someone to shop with." she felt the need to justify.

Helena settled herself differently in her chair and shot Alice a confused look, "What about... Bella? She seems very uptight."

Alice felt the urge to reach forward and sink her teeth into the perfectly white neck in front of her by that comment, but she controlled herself and swallowed loudly instead. She wasn't going to let Helena get away with calling Bella uptight, especially after she'd done her best not to think of her anymore. It was just hard when everything reminded her of her. Sometimes, these urges happened, and Alice hated when they did, but luckily she got better and better at controlling herself throughout the years, so Helena was safe. But she still wanted to let her friend know that speaking bad of her family was not acceptable.

"She's not uptight." Alice said and turned her eyes back to her laptop. If Helena was going to be like this, then she wasn't going to give her any attention.

"I'm sorry," Helena quickly mumbled and reached a hand over, searching for Alice's on the keyboard, but she quickly pulled it away, not wanting contact with her, "I just – I just sometime feels like she thinks she's better than me, and I'm like-"

Alice cut her off; this subject was not going to do her any good. She'd had enough of Bella already, she didn't need more of it. And if Helena was going to continue, Alice had the feeling that she might just be going into hysterics. "Could we please discuss something else, thank you." she firmly said, snapping her way out of it, which got Helena to effectively shut up.

The redhead closed the books she had in her lap and placed them on the table. With an uncertain look at Alice, she got out of the chair and sat herself onto the couch – right next to Alice. "I'm sorry." she quickly said, "I didn't mean to make you upset."

Alice glanced at her, raised an eyebrow at the closeness she was suddenly showing, but didn't voice her opinion out loud, "Could we just finish this up for today, please?" she mumbled.

Helena wrinkled her nose as she had a tendency to do, "I think it's 'nough for today – what do you say we watch a movie instead?"

Alice opened her mouth to answer, but before she had the chance to even do so, Helena was quick to move even closer to her (which was very quick for a human). Alice had seen this coming already this morning, but she wasn't going to let Helena carry through with what she wanted to do; the vision hadn't exactly ended in her taste, and Alice wasn't going to let it go very far. "What are you doing?"

Helena scooted away from her again, "You feel cold, are you cold? Your skin is ice cold."

Alice cocked an eyebrow, "I'm not cold, I've always had cold skin, don't worry about it."

Helena didn't seem to buy it exactly, but she scooted closer to her again, so she was halfway where she had been at first. Alice watched her gently; she could see the wheels turning inside her head. She wasn't sure what to do, but Alice knew what she was going to do. She'd seen it coming. But she wasn't going to let it get that far, so she had to get out of there _right_ now. But just as Alice had thought that exact thought, Helena leaned slightly forward, as if she was going to kiss her.

Fearing that her vision might actually come true if she didn't do something quick, Alice smacked her laptop close and stood up abruptly, "I have to go now!" she said, desperately trying to get all her things together in a hurry, so she could leave the house and Helena alone. She reached forward, grabbed her pencils, grabbed her books, her papers, her charger.

Helena stood up too, clearly confused; she'd been in a somewhat awkward position when Alice suddenly jumped up like a bunny, "What?" she shrieked as she checked her watch, "Now? _Already_? But I thought we were gonna watch a movie?"

"We'll do it some other day." Alice said, already halfway out of the room with her things tugged beneath her arms. And it was an empty promise, because there was no way, she was going to 'cuddle' up with Helena on the couch and give her plenty of reasons to make a move.

Helena caught up with her, desperate for her to stay – Alice could see that clearly, "Was it because of what I said about Bella?" she questioned in a whiny voice, "It's not that I don't like her, I just sometimes think that she's a bit harsh towards me, y'know? And she keeps-"

"It's not because of Bella, and I'll see you tomorrow." Alice stopped her rant as they reached the front door. With one last look at Helena, she crept outside and shut the door behind her.

Walking down the driveway, she had to control herself to walk slowly and humanly, and when she finally reached her car, she carefully started it and waved at Helena, who'd decided to watch her through the kitchen window.

-

Trying to carefully study a fashion magazine can be very hard in a house where, currently, no one seems to want to be happy. Carlisle and Esme had gone for a run in the forest behind the house, so she didn't have to worry about them. What concerned her the most was the she couldn't hear a sound from anyone else in the house. The only audible thing was the scratching of her nails when she turned a page.

Renesmee and Jacob weren't fooling around outside on the grass.

Rosalie wasn't telling Emmett what to do, and Emmett wasn't ignoring her while going from family member to family member, asking if anyone wanted to play a game with him.

And Bella wasn't doing whatever Bellas do these days.

It was quite frightening. There should never be allowed to be so quiet in a house like this. They were used to turmoil all hours of the day, so the silence was completely eerie. She knew that the others were downstairs somewhere, but that was all she could say for sure. She felt so alone, even in a house surrounded with all the people she loved.

Alice squinted her eyes together and tried to read something about green being the new blue, but her concentrating was not perfect these days. She decided to turn to the next page, but paused when she heard someone groan downstairs. Her ears perked, and she listened carefully.

"Why are you all being so fucking boring!"

That was Rosalie, and she did not sound happy. Thinking about it, she was the one who'd groaned too, and Alice applauded her in peace for trying to get them all to do something; this could not continue, they had to cheer up.

She could hear everybody steer downstairs and could practically 'hear' how every bone in Emmett's body was ready for some action; he couldn't bare being still for so long, not even if he was capable of it. Jacob sighed a huge sigh of relief too, which meant that he and Renesmee was downstairs as well.

"Let's do something!" Emmett was quick to suggest, backing Rosalie up.

"Let's all play a game?" Renesmee questioned them all, and Alice could hear that she wanted them all to cheer up as well.

But Bella was perfectly contend being boring, "I'm not up for anything right now." she harshly replied to them.

Alice's breath hitched in her throat and she flew across the floor and carefully sneaked her door open, hoping they wouldn't hear if they were too caught up in their own thing. She didn't want them to know that she was listening in, but she was too curious to ignore the fact that something was going on downstairs.

"Why not, Mom?" Renesmee whined, desperate to see a smile on her mother's face.

Bella didn't answer, so Rosalie took over again, "I know what I want to do, and it's possible, because Esme is not home right now. And _I know_ it's gonna cheer you up!"

Alice could practically hear the smile in Bella's voice, "Are you gonna play the piano?"

There was not an answer, but two seconds later, a nice flow of music was coming up the staircase, so Alice assumed that the answer was yes. She closed her eyes and leaned her head against the wall; she could almost see Rosalie in her head; caught up in her music, fingers moving across the keys with a speed of their own.

Something happened in the room beneath her, and she opened her eyes again and couldn't keep her smile off of her face; Jacob and Renesmee were getting up – they were slowly moving to the music, a soft song, and she could hear Emmett trying to get Bella off of her butt as well, but it was hard. She wasn't a dancer, she never had been.

Alice remembered a day once upon a time, when everything seemed so much better, when she tried to teach Bella how to dance, and they'd ended in a mess on the floor. Her long legs intertwined with Alice's short ones. They'd been laughing and having fun and had the entire future in front of them. But right after that, everything had been cut into pieces and their worlds had crashed down completely.

"Come on, Bella, dance with me..." Emmett begged her.

Bella was not giving in, "No!" she determinedly said, voice firm and hard. "No!"

Alice smiled to herself and held back her giggle. This was memories to her; happy memories, reminiscences of times where everything seemed better. And she wanted things to be like that again; she wanted them to be able to goof around all night, while the other citizens of Forks slept tightly in their beds. She wanted them to play music and dance and laugh, and feel happier than ever.

"Rose, play something quicker!" Emmett told his wife above the slow music, and barely had the words slipped across his lips, before the phase sped up, and Rosalie's fingers seemed to move quicker. A recognizable tune filled the house, and Alice didn't know whether she should cry or smile.

_Zoot Suit Riot. _

That was the exact song she'd danced to that day; the day where she'd gotten the horrible news from Tanya. But it didn't make her feel sad like she'd feared it would all these months. It made her feel a strange sort of comfort, and she knew she had to go down there and join her siblings as they tried to create the life they once knew and loved. She pushed the door open before she even had time to think about it, and she ran down the stairs, her feet barely touching the floor as she went.

When she entered the music room, it was pretty much like she'd expected it would be; Renesmee and Jacob were swinging wildly in the corner, Renesmee desperately trying not to be stepped on by Jacob's giant feet (that boy was so not a dancer!), Rosalie was still playing, but she looked up when she heard Alice stop in the door and winked briefly at her, before her head turned downwards again. Emmett was right next to her on the bench now, tapping his foot along to the rhythm, and in the corner was Bella, seated in a soft chair, looking at the entire scene.

Knowing that she might regret this for some reason, Alice took a rash decision, and she wasn't going to take no for an answer. She swept across the floor and stopped in front of her best friend, a hand in each side. Bella glanced back up at her with a whatever expression across her face.

"Dance with me, Bella." Alice firmly demanded, knowing that it wasn't going to help to ask nicely to begin with. With Bella it had always been much easier just to tell her what to do and keep on insisting.

The beautiful bombshell shook her head, "Nope."

"You know you wanna dance with me." Alice continued, her voice five octaves higher than the music and perfectly audible for Bella, "Remember this? We had so much fun. I was going to teach you how to dance."

Bella blinked a few times. "There's no point." she sombrely said.

Alice wrinkled her nose, "How so?"

"Sure, you can teach me how to dance. But who will I dance with? Edward's not here anymore."

Raising an eyebrow, Alice really couldn't believe that she'd said that, "You can dance with me. Jasper's not here either."

(It was the first time she'd really said that without breaking completely down).

"Someday you're gonna find someone else to dance with, you know that Alice."

That day might very well be years and years into the future, and they'd had plenty of dances to dance by then, but Alice was sure that Bella wasn't going to let her reason with her. She was determined to stay mad and angry, but Alice wasn't going to let her get away with that.

She stomped her foot, "Dance with me until then." she said, and this time she grabbed her hand and pulled her to her feet, certain that if she just got her onto the dance floor, Bella wasn't going to sit back down. Her arms were stiff as Alice pulled her with her, but she didn't jerk them away, and when they reached the middle of the floor, Alice grabbed one of her hands in each of her own and gently started swaying to the beat that was still quick and upbeat.

She loosened up a bit; she couldn't keep herself from trying to move, even if there was not a smile on her face yet. But she was moving, and that was one step forward. Alice smiled to her; looking up at her through her thick lashes; she then did one of those perfectly normal dance steps, one of those steps that anyone should be able to do, and she urged Bella on, as everybody watched them, but as they tried to do it together, everything came crashing down and they ended on the floor, just like they'd done the last time they tried to do this.

On the floor like that, with Alice on top of her, Bella couldn't help but laugh. Her stomach moved, and Alice could feel it in her body, and she rolled off of her, landing next to her on the floor, and there, they both laughed. It felt so good to laugh along with her, it felt so secure and nice, and the music was still playing, and Emmett was chuckling, and the kids were still dancing, and everything seemed so wonderful.

Right until Esme's usually small figure filled the entire doorway and everything came to a stop.

She seemed angry. There was no grin on her face, there was no smile in her eyes. Her lips were perched together, and she was focused on Rosalie, who'd now looked up and was stiff in her seat.

Esme opened her mouth to speak, but Rosalie was not backing down this time, "Don't say it. I know this was Edward's piano, but you gotta let me play."

And their mother closed her mouth and let her eyes fall to Renesmee and Jacob in the corner of the room; they were caught in mid-move, stopped in an awkward position. Her eyes went to Alice and Bella on the floor; they both still had grins on their faces, they hadn't quite been wiped off, and when she looked at them, for a second her eyes locked with Alice's, and suddenly her frown turned upside down, and a smile appeared.

Alice felt herself relax as Esme stepped back, clearly satisfied with the scene in there, and she disappeared completely, and Alice knew that it was OK for them to dance, and it OK for Rosalie to play on Edward's piano, and it was OK for them to laugh and have fun, even when Jasper and Edward weren't there.

She turned onto her side slightly, and stared down at Bella then, just as the music started playing again. Bella looked up at her, a thoughtful expression on her face.

They locked their eyes and Bella whispered, "Alice, I really need to talk to you."

Alice wasn't sure what was going to happen, but she knew that she had to do this, because for some reason, she had a feeling that she might be the cause of Bella's sudden depression. "OK." she whispered and nodded her head softly, "Let's talk. _Now_."

-

They were walking together, slowly, side by side; the forest was closed in around them, the darkness surrounding them, enclosing them with the sounds and the touches as a runaway leave kissed one of their cheeks as it swept by on it's way to freedom.

They'd been quiet since they left the house; Alice had a feeling that Bella wanted to get out of hearing distance from their noisy family, so she figured she'd wait it out and let her talk when she believed it was safe to do so. It was nice to be so close to her though, their arms were brushing, and occasionally, their fingers would pass each other too, and it soared through her as something unusual, and she wasn't quite sue what it was, but she knew she liked it.

Finally, as they entered a light clearing, where the moonlight could just reach through the bushy tops of the forest, Bella took a seat on the mossy ground, leaning back against a tree. Alice sat down in front of her, Indian style, with her back out in the open. She placed her hands in her lap and shot Bella an expectant smile.

"Alice, I've been really worried about you." Bella begun, after she'd watched her for a few minutes, clearly figuring out where to start and where to end.

Alice could not see what there was to worry about (after all, she'd finally started to get somewhat of a life after Jasper became ashes, so the worrying-part was pretty much over now), but she still nodded slowly, "Really? Why?"

Bella squinted her eyes together, "I know we all urged you to go out and be happy again, but in my opinion you've started to do some stupid things."

"What stupid things?" Alice cocked an eyebrow. If she'd done anything stupid that she wasn't aware of, then she'd like to know.

"Helena."

The name hung in the air between them and tensed them both up. Alice wasn't sure what exactly Bella was getting at, but she'd had a slight feeling that Helena might just be the problem, but she'd decided to give Bella the benefit of the doubt, hoping that she was wrong. But apparently she hadn't been, because Bella was saying the exact things that she'd feared she would.

"How can Helena be a problem to you?" Alice asked her, trying not to be harsh with her, and let her frustrations out; she didn't want them to fight anymore, "How can she be a stupid thing?"

"I just don't want you to talk to her!" Bella snapped, turning her head to the side, and therefore breaking their eye contact. She seemed touched by this in a way that Alice hadn't imagined possible, and it confused her because sure, it wasn't a good idea to talk to humans and risk revealing their secret, but the others weren't reacting like this. Not like Bella was.

Alice reached a hand out and determinedly turned Bella's head back to her, with a grip on her chin, "Why?" she wanted to know, their eyes once again locked.

"I just... I just don't like it."

And as Alice watched her once again, she really wasn't sure what to do. Bella seemed so sad, so taken because of all this, but Alice didn't understand why that was. It was weird to her, and as she sat there, watching her best friend, she was torn about what to do; give in to Bella and make her happier, or stand firm and do what made her get through the days and keep her spirit up?

That was the problem. What to choose, what to pick?

"_Alice!" _

_Alice turned around in the hallway after hearing the loud mentioning of her name by one special redhead. At the other end of the hallway, she could see Helena wave at her, Jane – as usual – right behind her, there in the background. Alice turned around and offered Bella and Renesmee a smile, "I've gotta go deal with her." _

_She turned to leave, but stopped when she felt Bella tug her hand, "Are you going to talk to her?" she whispered, only audible for vampire ears._

_Alice didn't answer, she simply gave a nod; she still wasn't sure that this was the right thing to do, but she was going to do it anyway, hoping for only the best. She wanted the best for Bella, and it was better this way. She zigzagged through the throng of people in the hallway, all eagerly heading for the front door and to the weekend ahead of them. She stopped in front of Helena and offered her a strained smile. _

"_What is it?" she breathed. _

"_I just wanted to know if maybe you can come over later and finish up our project?" Helena asked her, a huge smile on her lips, and Alice hated with all her might that she was about to ruin that. _

_She shifted the weight of her text books to her other arm, "Sure, I can be there right after dinner." _

"_Great!" Helena smiled, and Alice was about to turn again, thinking that the time wasn't going to be right today to tell her what Bella desperately wanted her to tell her, "Hey and also.." _

_Alice groaned on the inside and turned back around, forcing another smile onto her face, "Yeah?" _

_Helena wasn't quite sure how to say this, Alice could see that clearly, and she had a feeling that she knew what she was going to say; she feared it, because it'd lead her to have to say what needed to be said, but she wasn't really ready to do that. She wasn't sure if she'd ever be ready, and she had Bella pushing her all the time too. And she wanted to do this for Bella, because Bella was her absolute best friend and the person she loved most in the entire world. _

"_Maybe... Maybe you wanna come see a movie with me in Port Angeles?" Helena got across her lips and looked at Alice with such hopefulness that it was almost childish, "...on Saturday or Sunday? I hear there's some good ones this weekend." _

_Alice could feel Bella's eyes in the back of her neck, and she was – without a doubt – listening in on their conversation, and she was going to kill her (if possible) if Alice didn't use this perfect time in their conversation to say what needed to be said. "Uh... Listen Helena I-" _

"_You don't wanna see a movie?" she continued with a sideways grin, "That's cool, we can go for dinner instead. Your choice and my treat." _

"_No Helena." Alice firmly said and shook her head wildly, "I – I can't do that." _

"_Next weekend then?" the feisty redhead continued, clearly not giving up. _

_Alice sighed deeply, "Actually, I'm going to have to go with never..." Alice said, and she felt so sad, when she saw the light in Helena's eyes go out completely. She hated that she was the one to do that. "It's not such a good thing for me to hang around you." _

"_Why not?" Helena asked and shifted uncomfortably on her feet. Jane picked up her phone and pretended to text someone, probably out of respect for her best friend, so it didn't seem like she was listening when she was being shot down. _

"_We can finish this project together," Alice continued to explain to her, not wanting to give an answer to the 'why not'-part, which she knew she couldn't without overdoing it, "but after that, I can't see you anymore out of school, and you need to respect that." _

_Helena's eyes went to the floor for a few seconds and Alice desperately wanted to reach a hand out to comfort her, but she knew she couldn't, "But I thought..." she mumbled, as she looked up again, and small tears were actually seen in her eyes, "I thought that you were starting to like me too." _

"_It has nothing to do with me liking you or not." Alice quickly reassured her, hoping that that'd ease the pain a little bit. "It's something else, I can't tell you what, but you're gonna have to trust me." _

_Helena nodded lightly, "Okay... I trust you." _

_Alice felt relieved; relieved that she did, and relieved that this was over with, "Thank you." she whispered, before she turned around and walked down the now empty hallway to meet with Bella and Renesmee, who were still waiting for her. _

"....Alice?"

Snapping out of it, Alice was face to face with Bella again; in some way, she'd ended on her back, staring straight into the sky, but right now, Bella's face was blocking the vision to the starry clouds and the leafy crowns. She blinked a few times and said, "A vision."

"Everything OK?" Bella asked and sat back against tree, now sure that nothing was wrong with her.

"Just peachy." Alice said and sat back up against, trying to dust her back off, but without luck; she couldn't reach that far.

Bella offered her an insecure smile, "So..." she softly begun, "What do you say?"

With her vision turning over and over inside her head, Alice knew what she had to say, "Sure." she mumbled and gave Bella an exact copy of her smile, "Anything for you Bella, you know that."

It still didn't change the fact that Alice was going to have to break a heart. And very soon, by the looks of it.

-

It wasn't like she did it on purpose, but sometimes these things just happened to her. She couldn't really help it, at times she could be a magnet for trouble, and that was the case this time, too. Not that it was anything remotely big, but it just so happened that she caught a whiff of a conversation, and once she started eavesdropping, she simply couldn't stop. It was one of those annoying traits that Rosalie always complained about.

She didn't even want to pretend that she tried to pull herself away, because once she heard her name tangled in the mess of words, it was impossible not to keep on listening.

It was out of sheer luck that this happened. Her and Rosalie were supposed to go to Port Angeles to shop for something new to wear, but halfway there, Alice had predicted that it might not be the best idea to do that this this day, and Rosalie had called up Emmett; they'd catch a movie instead, so he'd caught up with them, and taken her seat next to Rosalie in the car, and Alice had ran back home, and while she quietly tried to pass the kitchen, her name had been mentioned.

Peeking in there, she saw Bella on the counter, swinging her legs lightly with a bigger smile than they'd seen in a long time; it had really helped that Alice had spoken to Helena, and she saw Esme, fidgeting around with something for Jacob and Renesmee to eat. She had become quite handy in the kitchen throughout the years, which was nice, because the kids would rather not make their own food.

But anyway, the name 'Alice' caught her attention, and assuming it was her (did they know other Alices?), she stopped to listen in.

"...Alice talked to her." Esme finished.

Bella shrugged lightly, completely unaware about the fact that she was being watched, "I just feel much better knowing she's not risking anything. It's the best for us anyway."

Esme smiled warmly at her daughter, "Carlisle and I were worried too. We were happy that she seemed to forget about Jazz, but what did she have in mind regarding that human? I'm sure she didn't intend on changing her!"

"I just think she was having some fun." Bella wisely said, and Alice smiled, because that was pretty much it (she couldn't believe though, that they were still discussing the matter of her and Helena – hell, it was over now, wasn't it?). Bella continued, "I don't know what she had in mind. I think she might have wanted to see if it was something for her."

Esme shot her a confused look.

"The lesbian-thing." Bella elaborated with a funny smile.

"Oh!" Esme laughed warmly, "Yeah, we talked about that too. Alice have always been a little to the side."

Bella shrugged again as Alice made a face at what Esme had just said; a little to the side? When had she been 'a little to the side'? And what side anyway? Left or right? She shrugged to herself and continued to listen, "I don't know, I think that perhaps Alice is just one of those people who falls in love disregarding gender or age." Bella absent-mindedly said, suddenly extremely focused on a dent in their counter.

Alice mentally thanked Bella because that was the conclusion she'd come to too. She wasn't gay or straight per say, she just fell in love.

"That sounds like Alice." Esme warmly said, love shining through her eyes. She got quiet then and focused on the dough she was mixing in the bowl. "I just... I just worry that – no matter what she is – that she won't fall in love again."

Bella cocked her head to the side, "What do you mean?"

Esme sighed and let bowl be bowl for some time, "What I mean is," she begun, her voice hurried and with an edge, "Alice and Jasper shared something very special, something very deep. I know that you and Edward did too," she quickly added, "but it wasn't on the same level. They connected in a way that none of us do. Maybe it was because of Jasper's power, I don't know, but there was something much deeper there."

"I noticed that." Bella flatly said.

Esme blinked a few times, "Yeah. And for you and Edward and all of us, the physical part was always so important, we can continue on all night," she said, not once blinking, even if they were talking about sex, because it was a matter that couldn't be avoided in a house where everyone heard everything, so none of them were uncomfortable with it (though Bella had been in the beginning), "which I'm sure that Jasper and Alice could as well, but it didn't happen that often. You know as well as I do, that they'd sit together and stare into nothing instead. They were just different."

Bella swallowed loudly, "Maybe it was because of Jasper."

Esme shrugged her shoulders and focused on her dough again for a few moments, "I'm just worried that Alice will never find another mate because no one can give her what Jasper did."

Alice was tensing up as she listened in. She knew they were right, and that was why it hurt her so much to hear it; she'd always known that she and Jasper were different from the rest of the family, and it had never bothered her, because she didn't desire the things that they did. But it also worried her that Esme might be right with her assumption.

Luckily, Bella had a different view on things, "I don't think Alice is going to search for that again. She knows it was her and Jasper's thing, and I doubt she'll look for that in another person."

Esme didn't sound convinced, "Maybe you're right."

"I think she might search for something completely different next time."

Esme sighed again and offered Bella a small smile, "Perhaps." she commented, before she turned the ball over and a huge amount of dough landed on the table, "Damn, this smells so nasty!" she continued as she continued to use her incredible strength and flatten it, "But let's not talk abut Alice, let's talk about you."

Bella now fidgeted with a hole in her jeans, "What about me?" she lowly questioned.

Esme snickered, "Do you think you're going to be ready for another mate someday?"

"Depends on who it is." she said.

"I'd really like it if you both found other mates." Esme confidently told her, and Alice knew that it was the truth; even if it was her sons they'd been with before, she knew that Esme also wanted them to be happy again, and that new mates could be – and would be – a huge part of that.

"It's hard to say to you," Bella begun, now looking at Esme again, "because Edward was your son, but I'd like so too."

Esme smiled warmly at her and reached a hand out to gently pad Bella on the cheek, "I'm just worried that Alice won't be ready." she said, dropping her hand to the table again.

Bella jumped off the table and placed an arm around Esme's shoulders while Alice held her breath, wanting to hear the next part desperately, "I think she'll be ready, Esme," Bella gently assured her, "I think she will be. If the right one comes along."

Esme turned to give Bella another smile, and Alice got off of the floor and quietly swept outside, shutting the door behind her; maybe there was something right about what Bella had said. Maybe she was going to be ready. She'd just have to wait for the right person. Somehow, that thought was really comforting, and she could almost enjoy how the sun hit her skin and sent sparkles reflecting everywhere.

Almost.

* * *

_Phew, that was nice! ;) _

_I'm so, so, so, so, so, SO sorry about the long delay, I really am. I have a good explanation though (like really good, as in better than in the past). Everything has been extremely bad at home so I've been trying to get my own place, and it's been a nightmare, and while balancing school I've had to deal with everything going on here, and it's been hell. I think I've found a place now though, so I just have to cross my fingers and hope I get the flat :P _

_Aaaand, so when I had a few spare minutes, I sat down and tried to write, but everything turned out crap, because I kept thinking about other things, so I was sort of blocked. Which is why I tried to write something else – I didn't want to ruin this by working through a block while writing it – but that didn't help (I posted it anyway), and now, finally, we've got break for a week, and I can get things off of my mind for a bit. I sincerely hope that I can update soon, because I hate to leave you guys hanging, but I've also got a bunch of assignments I need to write before school starts again, so we'll see. _

_Oh, and I need to apologise for the horrible start. I needed to get back on track with the storyline, and the beginning had to suffer. _

_Thank you so much for the nice reviews from last chapter though; I really enjoy reading all your comments and thoughts, it means the world to me. Please tell me what you thought of this chapter too (I hope you couldn't tell how many troubles I had starting it). _

_**Disclaimer; **I don't own Twilight. _


	8. Chapter Eight

**Chapter Eight **

"Alice!"

Alice could feel the smile on her face when she turned around on her often-used office chair and faced Jacob, who was standing in the doorway, a charming smile on his face; she really appreciated that she was able to see it now. When everything had been low-down in their house, he hadn't cut his hair, and it had grown out so quickly, as it had a tendency to do, and had become so long that Alice really couldn't stand to look at it. But yesterday he'd let her and Bella get at it with a pair of scissors. Renesmee had covered her eyes in fear for her husband, but Bella and Alice had had so much fun cutting those long strands of gorgeous black hair off and seeing them fall to the ground in bits, again and again.

She gracefully crossed her right leg over her left one, "Jacob!"

He hesitantly took a step into her room and closed the door behind himself. Not that it would do him any good if he intended on keeping noisy people out of their conversation. Everyone else would hear it perfectly through the beautifully carved wood. "I was uh... sent to talk to you."

Alice didn't know why, but it seemed as people were often 'sent' to talk to her these days... as if no one wanted to do it of their own free will. She couldn't help but smile at the thought.

"_Sent_... to talk to me?"

Jacob made a face, "Yeah well..." he trailed off, his voice low as he looked to the ground.

"Jacob!"

He looked up again, surprise in his eyes.

She stuck her tongue out at him, "Look, I know it's nothing serious, you and Emmett are just getting at me, but I really can't play a game with you guys today, I've got stuff to do."

She glanced briefly to the side where all the old boxes and suitcases with Jasper's things were still sitting on the ground, where she'd left them so long ago. She hadn't really been in them except when she wanted to wear something of Jasper's, but she figured that now was the perfect time to go through his things and put the unusable into their loft. She wanted to get this done before the future came knocking in their door, because then she mightn't be ready for it.

Jacob's sly smile faded into nothing, "What? Why?" he whined.

Alice chuckled, "I need to look at some of Jasper's things, I think – I might need closure?" she wasn't sure if she was asking him or not, so she definitely didn't wait for an answer, "If I get done quickly, we'll play later. Tell _Emmett_ that."

Jacob offered her a short nod before he turned around and left the room. Alice fell to the floor as she thought of Emmett's expression downstairs, without a doubt already knowing what her answer was, because he'd been listening in – of course he had, he could never help himself.

But she didn't want to worry about Emmett and his game, because right now she had more important things to do. She reached for her remote control on her bed and flipped the radio on without even bothering to look up, and then she dropped the remote to the floor and focused entirely on the task she had before her.

Pretty much all the things Jasper enjoyed and did, he'd enjoyed and done with her; their music collection, their films and their books, they were hers too and already in this room. What really needed to be sorted through was his clothes and the more private things, not that there were much of these.

She flipped the first box open and came face to face with all Jasper's old school things. His laptop was there, his book bag, his books and a lot of old papers and assignments. For a second, Alice felt the need to sort through everything, but what would the point be? She knew Jasper had done these things, but they didn't capture the essence of him. Nothing school related did. He'd always hated going to school, he'd enjoyed it more when they left their family behind and took a year off to see the world.

Her hands lingered on his pencil case for a few seconds, before she made a decision and smacked the box close. All of that – out.

She pushed the box away and opened a suitcase instead, knowing that would hold some of his clothes. He'd had a lot of it. Not that he really cared about fashion, but Alice herself did, and everybody knew she'd never let him wear the same outfit twice. She smiled as she picked up an old sweater of his, so warm and fussy... she was going to keep this one. She wasn't going to keep it all, she had to choose, to hold on to something to remember him by, but she wasn't going to allow herself to keep it all. It wouldn't do her anything good; she had to be able to move on in some way, and wearing his clothes would only hold her back.

She sung quietly along to the radio as she sorted through his things, one by one, reminiscing, thinking back at all their wonderful times, but also thinking about the future, and how she was getting ready for it, getting ready for what it might bring. No matter what happened and who happened to be knocking on the door to her frozen heart, Alice knew that she was going to be ready. And if it happened tomorrow or next week, or even fifty years from now, maybe a thousandth, she would be ready, because she'd done this; she'd had closure.

For the first time in a very long time, Alice was surprised when she heard a knock on the door and hadn't heard the person approaching. She'd been so caught up in her own head, she hadn't heard a thing. She turned around to tell whoever it was to just enter, but Bella was already halfway inside, a small smile across her beautiful face.

"Hello Bella!" Alice cheered and turned the volume down slightly, just so it'd be easier for them to talk – not that they had a problem hearing or anything.

Bella took a seat on the floor next to Alice, squeezing her way though multiple things on the floor and a whole lot of old crap. "Jacob said you were looking at Jasper's things?" she questioned, even if she didn't need to, because that was pretty clear when one entered the room.

Alice glanced to the side and offered her a small grin, "I just figured that this needed to be done." she lightly answered, and became well-aware of the fact that Bella was pretty close to her and that it felt absolutely secure and awesome.

Bella seemed to be of the same opinion, because she lifted her arm and placed it around Alice's shoulders only to thereafter give her a comforting squeeze. Some sort of weird sensation flew through her body at that act of love and Alice shuddered involuntarily, before she scooted a bit closer to her best friend.

"Do you need some help with this?" Bella wished to know.

Alice closed her eyes and leaned her head onto the mattress of her bed, which she could just reach. Their backs were pressed against the wood and Bella's presence was better than she'd expected. "Let's take a break, I think I've done enough for now."

Bella was getting ready to draw her arm back, "Well, what do you wanna do then? We could-"

Alice cut her off, "Let's just sit like this for a while, OK? It's nice."

Smiling knowingly, Bella let her arm be where it was and settled herself more comfortably as well. "I think it's awesome that you're doing this." she lowly whispered, their heads touching slightly as the both of them glanced into the ceiling. "I haven't done it yet. I still find Edward's things everywhere. I haven't been in his car either. My favourite cardigan is out there, can't wear it, can't pick it up. It's just out there."

Alice glanced at her, not knowing what to say to that. She'd thought that Bella was perfectly well; that everything was going awesome for her. That she'd been handling this better than anyone else would have done. And it'd looked like that on the outside, but Bella had still needed to deal with it, and she'd done it on her own, in peace. Alice felt so proud of her, because she'd never have been able to do that herself.

Still not sure of what would be appropriate to say at this point, Alice turned slightly over and wrapped both arms around Bella's waist. Had she been human, the position she was now in would have been very painful, but of course she didn't feel a thing. She hummed into Bella's side along to the sound of the radio, her mouth pressed to her t-shirt, at a spot right on her ribcage.

A hand landed in Alice's hair and started slowly combing through it, and Bella whispered, "I love it when you do that. When you sing like that. Your voice is always three octaves higher than the actual song."

Not having time to respond, Alice simply continued humming.

Bella stopped moving her hand and let it drop to its previous spot around Alice's shoulders and breathed out contently. "I love _you_ too, you know that, don't you?" she whispered.

And Alice stopped humming this time and glanced up at her, a sly smile across her face, "I do." she murmured, voice buried in Bella's clothes and body, "I love you too. More than anything, more than anyone else. I love you like that Bella."

A small smile formed on Bella's face and they just stared at each other for a few silent minutes, the radio the only thing in the room making a sound at all. And Alice looked into Bella's eyes and there was something so secret and sacred there, and she didn't know what it was, but something seemed to change between at this moment, and Alice felt her breath hitch and suddenly Bella was on her feet and at the door.

"Call me if you need help, OK?" she questioned, and then she'd left the room.

Alice cocked an eyebrow, truly puzzled at the strange behaviour Bella had just had, but decided to put nothing into it. She sighed and looked around the room; there was a small pile of clothes to keep, a huge one to throw out, some boxes should that way too, and then there were two that she hadn't had time to look through yet.

Deciding that these two could wait until tomorrow, Alice got up to join her siblings downstairs and make Emmett unbelievably happy.

-

Alice could feel the hard gaze on the back of her neck throughout the entire biology class. It was as if Helena's eyes were trying to burn holes through her skin and get into her brain – maybe she wanted to see why Alice had suddenly dumped their friendship into the dirt? Well, if that was the case, then she'd see Bella there. Actually... if she were to look for anything in there, she'd probably see Bella, since Bella was the only thing Alice had been able to think about since their odd moment in her bedroom.

"Why don't you just try to talk to her about it?" Jane whispered suggestively behind them; trying to cheer Helena up and help her get through this, "Why don't you just... tell her that you're sorry if you moved too fast, and that you'd like to start over?"

Helena growled back at her, "It doesn't work that way, Jane!" she hissed, one eye on Alice's back and one eye on Jane, whose eyes were wide behind her glasses.

"Then tell me," Jane said, obviously pretty annoyed with her and the subject, even if she tried to be a good friend, "how does it work?"

Alice felt relieved when Helena's entire focus was on Jane and her neck didn't burn any longer, "I don't think she likes me like that, Jane, I don't think she's gay, labels or not. It just doesn't seem that way."

Jane objected, "But who wouldn't like you! You're gorgeous, Lena."

Alice could hear all the blood rush inside Jane's body, rush to her cheeks, and for a second she was wondering what was going on between the two best friends, but mostly – Jane? What was going on with Jane? Something was different, or maybe it was as it'd been all along, but only she hadn't seen it before.

Turning her eyes to the clock and still with her pencil on her paper, Alice glanced at the time. Five minutes until class was over; they were working by themselves because Mr. Rush had somewhere to be, and he said he trusted them enough to get some work done by themselves. Bad judgement on his part, but Alice hadn't been able to bare taking the dream away from him.

Both Bella and Renesmee were working next to her; of course they were. They were star students. They didn't need it though, they could have done like Alice herself, but Renesmee was like her mother and they both preferred doing the work over and over. Alice had always thought that that was such a cute character thing with them.

"Anyway..." Helena trailed off, "I think I might need to focus my attention on someone else. Ya' know anyone who's gay that I _haven't_ slept with?"

Jane opened her mouth to speak, but before she even did so, everything became very, very clear to Alice.

"_But – but how long Jane?" Helena questioned. There were small tears in her eyes, but it was evident that they were from happiness, not from sadness. She seemed happy, all-in-all. _

_Jane smiled warmly at her and brushed her newly bought red skirt off, "For forever, Lena, you've just been too busy to notice what's right in front of you." _

_Helena didn't speak, she simply just stared at Jane, completely frozen in shock. _

"_So I decided that maybe if I tried to capture your attention with something new to wear, something different, maybe you'd notice me, but that didn't seem to help."_

"_You're beautiful!" Helena quickly said, voice rushed and hurried. She reached an arm out and pulled Jane close, hugged her deeply, "You've always been beautiful in your own way, you just didn't do anything to help it along. But like this – I have to be careful someone else won't take you away from me." she swallowed loudly and pulled back again, before softly adding, "...assuming you'll still have me?" _

_Jane brushed a small tear away from her cheek and smiled warmly at the redhead, "Of course I'll have you, silly! I've waited too long to give up on you, I've liked you for ages... let's – let's just start over, okay?" _

_Helena smiled warmly again and pulled Jane in, planting a firm, but sweet kiss on her lips. It only lasted a few seconds, before she pulled back, placing her forehead on Jane's, "And I who didn't even know you were into girls." _

_Jane chuckled, "You can be a little self-centred at times, but... it's OK. I love you anyway." _

_And Helena pulled her back in again, kissing her over and over. _

Alice was pulled back to reality by the bell and had to shake it off for a few seconds before she could pack her things together. Jane? In love with Helena? That was new! But it was positive news because it seemed like she might get her wish. Alice saw the two friends get up and gave Jane a once-over. It didn't seem like she'd tried to change herself to capture Helena's attention yet. Maybe... perhaps she needed a push in the right direction?

"You coming, Al?"

Alice turned her head to the side to find Renesmee smiling down at her, "No, you – you guys go ahead." Alice absent-mindedly said, "I've got some things to do, I'll meet you in the cafeteria."

Bella and Renesmee shared a look, but left her alone anyway. Alice quickly started to get her things together, now wondering how Helena and Jane's conversation had ended, hating that she didn't hear the last bit of it. But what she'd seen... what she'd seen had definitely been good. She just had to do something about it.

And deciding to get it done before she changed her mind, Alice piled all her things into her arms and rushed after the two best friends. She stopped in the door to the classroom and glanced both ways to see where they'd gone, which was done quickly, because there weren't many redheads in their school.

"Helena!" she called and rushed after them, "Jane!"

The two of them stopped and turned around; Helena's face immediately lit up, thinking that Alice might want to talk to her, and Jane looked annoyed, which Alice completely understood and therefore didn't take offence to. She stopped before the two of them, "Jane."

That she was addressing Jane and not Helena clearly took them both off guard, but Alice didn't have time to worry about that.

"I need to talk to you in private for a second, is that OK?" she asked, knowing that if she took too long, Bella would send out a search-party for her, or worse – try to listen in.

Helena's face turned from confused to hurt and angry, and Jane's turned from confused to even more confused, but she nodded anyway. Turning to Helena, she swore in a whisper, "I don't know what she wants, I'll be right in."

Pretending that she hadn't heard a thing (because she knew that was Jane's intention), Alice grabbed her arm, "I'll have her back to you in a matter of minutes, Helena." she reassured the redhead and pulled Jane with her through the throng of people making their way to the cafeteria for lunch. She didn't stop pulling until they were in the bathroom, and not bothering to check if there was anyone in there (she knew there wasn't; not a sound could be heard), she went right to it, "I know your secret."

Jane looked truly confused at her. "What secret?" she whispered, ready to fight this with her.

"That you like a certain redhead we both know." she continued as she dropped her things to the dirty floor.

Nothing more was needed to be said, because Alice knew she was right. The colour faded from Jane's face and she turned to the sink and dropped all her books next to it, before she gave Alice a look. She wasn't even going to deny it, Alice could see that. "Give me a second." she whispered, before she slowly walked to the first stall, her steps echoing in the silent bathroom. She pushed the first door open, and Alice knew what she was doing.

"There's no one here, don't bother." she said and leaned herself against the wall, crossing her arms. She knew that Jane was going to check anyway, even if Alice had told her what she did, and not a sound could be heard from any of the stalls. Jane proceeded to check every stall as if Alice hadn't said a thing.

She finally returned to the sinks, her face still very pale.

"Are you ready to talk to me now?" Alice said, tilting her head slightly as she stared at Jane, taking in her every feature. It was right what she'd first assumed when she met Jane and Helena. Helena was the beautiful one, the obvious beauty who turned heads when she walked down the street, sort of like Rosalie. But Jane – she wasn't half bad. She had some striking features, she just hid them very well. She was one of those people, where one would have to search for the beauty, where it lay differently. She was... sort of like Bella.

And Alice knew – she _knew _with every fibre of her being – that these beauties were the most dangerous ones because they'd surprise people when they least expected it. And she knew that Helena liked a good challenge, and that these were the kind of girls she preferred. She just hadn't known that one was right in front of her.

_It's time to help love blossom_, Alice thought to herself.

"Alright," Jane concluded with a raised eyebrow, "so how did you find out? No one else have noticed, what gave me away?"

Alice offered her a small smile, "I notice these things."

"So I bet you've had a real good laugh, huh?" Jane continued and started to walk around the dirty floor, her steps once again echoing in the big bathroom, this time much louder and quicker. Her hands were in her sides, and she was pretty worked up, "Just laughing about me and how I'm in with the person whose attention is only on you!"

Alice just looked at her with sceptic eyes, "You really think I'd laugh at that?"

Jane stopped and heaved in and out frantically. She swallowed loudly and stared at Alice through the cracked bathroom mirror, "No." she firmly said, before she turned around on the spot and looked at her fully, "And that's what kills me the most. You're too nice, Alice, there's nothing wrong with you, she's entitled to like you, I can't put a finger on you."

Alice stood up straight and let her arms drop to her sides, "You know I don't like her at all right? I always just wanted to be her friend."

"I know that now, doesn't change the fact that she's hung up on you."

"Well," Alice said and took a small step closer, "that's because she doesn't know that you're right here. What do you say we do something about that?"

"Please," Jane said and shook her head repeatedly, her ponytail moving along with her, "there's nothing to do. She doesn't know I'm into girls, and she'd never like me like that."

Alice took a step closer again, this time getting into her personal space. She held her breath the best she could while she spoke, "You're exactly her type, Jane. The less obvious beauty."

Jane didn't reply.

Alice took a step closer again, "Allow me." she said, but she didn't wait for Jane to allow anything, she reached a hand out to the back of Jane's head and pulled out her ponytail, letting the elastic band fall to the floor. She pulled her hair forward and fixed it a bit, before she carefully took off her glasses. "Why are you hiding behind all these things? She can see you so much better without them."

Jane seemed awfully confused and held a hand out as if to ask for her glasses. Alice gave her them, and she took a step backwards and placed them on her nose again. "I'm not beautiful, Alice, not like you are."

"I'm telling you," Alice sang and looked at her, "do something about yourself, buy some colourful clothes, play with your hair, wear some make-up – she'll love you. You think I get out of bed looking like this?"

Jane silently shook her head. "I have the money, you know. To buy nice clothes. I work three times a week."

Alice clapped her hands together in support, "There you go!"

Jane still looked uncertain, Alice could clearly see that. And of course it was going to take some time before she was ready to tell Helena about her feelings, but it was a start to try and get her attention. "But how... how do I tell her?"

"I think that'll all come together eventually." Alice reassured her, and with those words, she turned her arm over and gave her wristwatch a look. "I have to go now, though. My siblings will be looking for me, but remember what I said."

Jane smiled warmly at her as Alice bent down to get her things and then reached for the door. "Thank you, Alice, you're awesome."

Alice winked at her one, two times, before she pushed the door open and hurried down the now empty hallway.

-

It was like flipping through every memory she had of the two of them, inside her brain, except much better, because she saw it from a different perspective. She saw it through someone else's eyes, not just her own. If it were Jasper's or Carlisle's or perhaps someone else's, she wasn't always sure because that changed from time to time, but she was mostly in the picture, and she saw different things than she remembered.

Like, for instance, in one of the pictures, Jacob, Renesmee and Emmett were making goofy faces, while she, Jasper and Esme were smiling happily, because they didn't know. Carlisle was behind the camera, she remembered, and Rosalie and Bella had been preoccupied, not having time to be in the picture.

It was wonderful, flipping through these old albums, flipping through time. Most of the pictures Jasper had taken; he'd always loved doing that, he documented most moments, wanting to remember them for ever and always. But some of them, he were in, when someone else had used his camera and taken one of them.

Alice's eyes lingered on a picture like that, of just the two of them; they were sitting beneath a tree together; eyes closed, Alice leaning against his chest with his arms around her stomach. They were resting, enjoying their closeness, and someone – she suspected that this was Esme – had sneaked up on them and captured their moment for all eternity.

The pixie vampire pulled the picture out of the plastic that surrounded it and decided to keep this on her night stand; this way he'd always be right there next to her when she slept.

There was a knock on the door and Alice smiled at the thought. "Come on in here, Nessie."

Renesmee stuck her curly head into her room through the small crack in the door. "What are you doing?" she smiled. Her eyes quickly gave the room a once-over and her face lit up, "Oh, pictures!" she cheered and pushed her way inside, to sit down next to Alice, where Bella had been just yesterday.

"It's Jasper's old albums." Alice told her and flipped a page, only to find a really old picture in there; from right after she and Jasper had joined the family.

"Oh wow." Renesmee whispered and reached a finger out to touch the old faces, "Look at Granddad's hair!"

Alice couldn't help but giggle too, because Carlisle did look sort of funny.

"Grandma always had that long hair?" Renesmee wondered, gazing at Esme's beautiful auburn hair, that had had the long length as long as Alice had known her.

Alice nodded and turned another page. "I wanted to look through all of Jasper's things. I completely forgot that he had all these. I'm gonna keep them."

"Of course!" Renesmee smiled, happiness radiating off of her, "They're memories. Who throws memories down the drain?"

"Not me, that's for sure." Alice reassured her, and Renesmee didn't reply, so a comfortable silence came between the two of them, and she kept changing the pages, the both of them looking with small smiles and thoughts leading back to the good old days.

Suddenly Renesmee broke the silence though, "Hey, I was wondering..." she softly begun, "where were you during lunch? I tried to keep Mom occupied. She was gonna listen in."

Alice couldn't help but laugh. "I knew she would do that. Thanks Nessie."

Renesmee glanced at her; her eyes searching Alice's face, as an X-ray, trying to see if she could figure out what Alice had been up to. With no such luck, she asked once more. "But what was so important?"

Alice flipped a page, "I just had to help a friend." she replied, and they both turned their focus back to the pictures; Renesmee realizing that she'd get no better answer out of her, and Alice smiling because she was happy that Renesmee didn't pry further. She paused though, when she saw what picture that was sitting in her lap.

"Wow!" Renesmee gushed, gracing the picture again with her finger. "You guys look so happy. That's a really good picture of you two."

"Jasper took this." Alice remembered, her eyes gracing her own face, which was snuggled into Bella's side. The beautiful brunette was smiling too, her eyes were lit with such a flame, it burned right through the photograph. "It was when you and Jacob were in Britain, we had this picnic one time, none of us ate anything of course, but we pretended, brought all the games, Esme thought it'd be fun...." she paused and smiled once more at the wonderful memory, "Bella and I teamed up against Emmett and Rose, we lost, of course, but we had so much fun."

Renesmee glanced up at her; Alice could tell that she loved hearing these old things, that she enjoyed it. "Mom's always been really happy when she was with you, aunt Alice." she whispered, her eyes falling back to the photo again, "She was better once you started going to school with us too. She needs you."

"Your mother and I are really good friends, Nessie. I knew we would be from the time I first saw her."

Renesmee nodded again, "I know that... And Mom. Mom's really happy now, too. She's staying happy. Like on this picture. After you guys talked about the entire deal with Helena... she seems more happy."

Alice squeezed Renesmee tightly, "There's nothing I wouldn't do for your mother, Nessie."

Renesmee glanced up at her again, and Alice wasn't sure what it was, but she saw something in her eyes, something in those wonderful brown pools. She couldn't tell what the deal was, but it made her uncertain, made her wonder what Renesmee was thinking, which ideas she was getting, but before she even had the time to voice her thoughts, it was all gone, and Renesmee closed the album in their laps.

"I've gotta go hunt. You wanna join me?"

Alice smiled warmly and placed the album on her bed. "Sure, I do."

-

_She took in a deep breath and leaned herself against the sink in her bathroom. The entire house was quiet. Not a sound could be heard, everyone had gone to a movie in town, except the one special person she really needed to spend some quality time with. The entire family had understood that they needed some time alone, every each of them did once in a while, so they'd obliged to watch a boring movie for the evening. _

_There was this one thing that she really wanted to do tonight, and she'd talked to Carlisle and Esme about it earlier. They'd both told her that they thought it was a wonderful idea and quite frankly about time. She thought so too. That was why there was a little black box hidden in the depths of her bathrobe pocket. _

_She checked once more to make sure that it really was there, and smiled when her fingers closed in around the cold plastic. _

_She glanced into the mirror and looked herself in the eyes while she supported the look with a pep talk. "Alright, Bella," she whispered, clutching the marble counter as loosely as she could, "you can do this. Just go pop the question." _

_Bella stood up straight and fidgeted with her hair a little, knowing how much it meant to her lover that it sat perfectly, especially on a night like this. She leaned forward to check her make up for any imperfections, but she found none, and deciding that she couldn't hold it any longer, she turned to leave her bathroom. _

_They still didn't have the same room. They'd always had one each, but sometime soon, she was going to change that as well. They could never decide which one to sleep in, so it'd be easier if they just made one of them into a sowing room and redecorated the other one together. _

_Her feet padded soundlessly down the carpeted hallway. It was dark outside with very few stars because of the clouds, and almost no light came through the windows. Not like it mattered anyway. Perhaps she'd feel better doing this in the dark. She came to the end of the hallway, just where the staircase begun, and pushed the door open, not bothering to knock. Her lover would be waiting for her anyway, so what was the point? _

_There was little light in this bedroom too. Only the flickering from the TV where an old film with Johnny Depp was showing threw its unsteady light into the room once in a while. Her lover was huddled up on the bed, evidently naked; some skin was showing, which made Bella sure that there was no clothes underneath the blanket that was carelessly covering some of the milky skin she loved to touch. _

"_Hey there." _

_Bella smiled and crawled onto the bed, her robe half untied. "Hey there, too." she whispered, not caring about her robe because she'd soon see it on the floor anyway, along with the slutty underwear that she was wearing underneath. _

_They shared a few kisses, their lips caressing each other with hurried movements as they both savoured having a quiet house all to themselves. _

_Bella leaned back and reached for the box in her pocket. The other pair of golden eyes were once more on the TV, so her movement went unnoticed, and her fingers closed around the plastic once more, and as she dropped her hand to the mattress again, the box was settled between her skin and the soft cushion. "I've got something I need to ask you." _

_Their eyes locked once more and a smile could be seen. "What?" _

_Bella had thought about how to phrase this so many times because she wanted it to be perfect, but she'd never really figured out how to do it properly. Not that it mattered, because as she gazed into the eyes she loved so much, she was sure that no matter what she said, the answer would be yes. "I was just wondering... because I love you so much-" _

"_I love you too." _

_Another kiss was shared, and Bella laughed to herself, "I know you do, and that's why I'm gonna ask you this." _

_A certain look and she was urged on. _

"_Do you – do you want to marry me... Alice?" _

Alice Cullen sat up straight in her bed, her iPod falling to the floor in the process. She could feel how her entire body was frozen as the thought of what she'd just seen settled into her mind.

There was no doubt about it. Her and Bella. Almost naked. Together. In this bed. Kissing. And Bella... Bella asking her to – to marry her?

Alice raised an eyebrow and absent-mindedly reached for her iPod and turned it off. What the fuck did that vision just mean? That couldn't – that couldn't be true, it just simply... couldn't.

Alice fell to the mattress again where she'd laid down hours ago to listen to music and read through fashion magazines. She placed her hands beneath her head and closed her eyes to think it through once more.

It was certain. She'd just – she'd just dreamt that her and Bella were lovers, and apparently they'd been so a long time. The entire family knew, they loved each other like that, they were going to marry each other. Alice had felt that, felt everything that Bella was feeling, and she was sure of it. And it was so... strange. Her vision was clear. She was going to love Bella, that was certain.

And the funny thing was – instead of shying away from the vision, she was actually intrigued by it.

* * *

_Hello everyone! I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I tried to write it as fast as possible, and it really helped that I had a break from school ;) So. A lot of things happened in this chapter. I hope you liked my twist with Helena and Jane? It was something I was puzzling with from the beginning. Aaaand, something finally 'happened' with Alice and Bella, though it probably wasn't what you'd expected to see first. I hope it made sense though. _

_I want to thank Freudian Slips Cause Problems for talking to me about how to do this properly. I knew you guys all wanted a chapter in Bella's point of view, but I was doubting that because I thought I'd ruin the flow of the story if I suddenly changed perspective. So we talked a lot about it, and came to the conclusion that I could use it in a vision, and it actually worked out quite nicely! First I had Alice seeing things from her side in this vision, but this worked out better, so thanks! I was happy that you listened to me and had time to discuss it with me. _

_I want to thank you all for the awesome reviews for last chapter; you all make it so much better writing this story and spending so much time on it. I hope you liked this chapter too, and I'd love to hear your opinions. :) I'll try to hurry with the next update, but school's starting again tomorrow, so I can't promise anything. _

_**Disclaimer; **I don't own Twilight. _


	9. Chapter Nine

**Chapter Nine**

It was sort of strange.

The next couple of days were completely weird and not like any other days Alice had ever experienced because she'd never been in a situation like this before. She'd been in a many situations – even many horrible, awkward, weird situations – but still never one quiet like this. And she had to admit. This one took the cake.

Which was sort of strange too, since she didn't even eat cake.

Alice paused and bit her lip in thought. How come she'd ended up like this? How come she was so uncertain about what to do about it? It had happened before. She'd see a vision and be unsure what to do with it. She'd often consulted Carlisle, and though she knew she could tell him anything, she wasn't quite sure if she wanted to share this particular problem with him. And – no matter which visions she'd get, if she was in them herself, she'd normally take action immediately and go out there and do it the way she wanted it to be done; she had the power to change the future when she saw these things, but right now... right this moment... she'd have rather not.

She had never viewed her visions as a curse before. Never. She'd always thought that it was the most amazing gift a vampire could receive, something very outstanding, something that gave the possessor enormous power. And she'd always enjoyed that power, done with it what she thought was best. But for some reason... the answer to this particular vision – that wasn't so easy.

_Why am I having these many troubles? _Alice asked herself as she lay there, staring at her ceiling, _Why can't I just forget about it, make sure it doesn't happen? It's Bella for fucks sake! Bella Cullen! Edward's wife! Why am I even thinking about this, she's my best friend!? I shouldn't be thinking these things, it should be pretty obvious what I was going to do. _

Alice rolled over on her bed and groaned into her mattress. Sure, it should be pretty obvious, but for some apparent reason, it wasn't. So that was why she was now asking herself – did she like Bella? Did she view her as more than that best friend?

And the lithe vampire had to admit. Yes, it was a possibility that she did. She'd always found Bella extremely beautiful, always thought that she was the most amazing person she'd ever met, except for Jasper. Jasper had always been the most important, most fantastic person – but...

_Jasper isn't here anymore_.

Turning back around to stare at the ceiling again, that was the argument that rotated around inside Alice's head over and over. Jasper was gone. He'd been gone for a while. And what could she do about it? Nothing, nothing. She'd mourned enough as it was, wasted so many days regretting it, hating herself for sending him into the arms of the Volturi. But he wasn't there anymore, and it was too late to reverse that.

Had she expected to live the rest of her existence by herself? No, certainly not. But she hadn't expected falling for her best friend either. That thought was just – just so out there, so strange. It was hard for her to get her head around it, but she had to admit that... that it was rather intriguing to think about loving Bella that way.

What wouldn't it be like to run her fingers through those brown locks she'd always admired? What wouldn't it do to her if she could comb through it, dig her nose into it and breathe in the comforting and familiar scent of someone so dear? How wouldn't it feel, how wouldn't _she_ feel?

Alice was certain. If she was going to love anyone again, if she was going to have closure with Jasper and find someone new, then Bella was the perfect answer. She was right there, she was the person Alice trusted more than anything, and... and Alice had a feeling that it would be_ good_. They'd be good together.

Sitting up straight to lean her back against the wall, the vampire closed her eyes to think some more. If she'd now come to the conclusion that she should do something about it, then was the next big question, what exactly should she do? Who knew... maybe that vision she had of Bella proposing to her was way in the future? No one could tell. Sure, they were living here, but this would always be their home, and they'd be back again some day. And they'd always look the same. Maybe if she did something about it, that vision wouldn't happen? Maybe it was supposed to happen on its own, maybe Bella was supposed to make the first move. But how would she know, how would she do what was right?

It was so hard to do the right thing when she didn't know what it was. There was only one thing she could see that'd help her with this, and that was an option she'd already debated with her inner self. She could always talk to Carlisle about these things, she had always had been able to. But since Carlisle wasn't the more obvious person to talk to about this particular vision, then there was someone, someone so full of love and adoration, someone who had a heart bigger than anyone else Alice knew, someone she could actually talk to, who'd always listen.

The question was just... how did she go about asking Esme all these things?

-

"Wow, it's been so long since I've been to one of these places." Alice breathlessly whispered as she pushed the car door open and stepped outside, quickly hiding beneath Renesmee's umbrella.

The younger one giggled, "And that's really weird, considering how much you used to love it."

Rosalie locked her car and stepped under Bella's umbrella, "I would say it's about time, but I'm keeping my mouth shut over here."

Alice reached a hand out and smacked her lightly in the side. "Shut up, Rose!"

"Shouldn't we rather go inside?" Bella quickly questioned, before Rosalie even had time to think of a come-back.

Renesmee seemed to agree with her mother, for she got a good hold of Alice's arm and dragged her off with a mumbled, "Yeah."

They crossed the huge parking lot outside the Port Angeles mall and when they got inside, they quickly shook off their umbrellas and enjoyed the fact that they could now walk without them. While the other three contemplated what to do about the umbrellas since none of them wanted to carry them around, Alice stood in awe and took in the entire atmosphere – a feeling she hadn't savoured for so long.

When Rosalie had declared this morning that she wanted to go shopping today, Alice hadn't known if she was quite ready for it. But Esme had seemed to think that it was a good idea; Carlisle and Emmett were going hunting and Jacob was going home to be with his family in the reservation, so Esme had said that if they all left, she was going to clean the entire house.

Taking that into consideration, while having to look at Rosalie's scolding glare, Renesmee's begging eyes, and not forget to mention Bella's "I want you to go, you have to help me find new clothes.", Alice simply hadn't been able to say no. So there she was; standing inside the mall, and she'd never felt the need to power-shop more.

Just then Renesmee stepped up behind her and linked their arms, "Are you ready? We all want new dresses, the school dance is coming up soon."

Alice nodded, "What did you do with the umbrellas?"

Renesmee shrugged her shoulders, "Rose threw 'em out, said we could just buy some new ones."

Alice nodded and Bella grabbed her other arm, "You know you're going to have to help me pick out that dress of mine, right? I'm still hopeless at fashion."

Alice looked up at her, and couldn't keep that smile off of her face when their eyes locked, "I'd love to help you out, Bella!" she happily cheered, and decided to forget the fact that every time she looked at Bella these days, her entire body would suddenly be filled with something different and unusual.

Rosalie rolled her eyes, "Fine, 'nough with the chit-chat, I'm gonna go get me some dresses!"

The other three agreed, and they set off down the mall, walking in between throngs of people who was there to do what they were doing as well. Alice couldn't believe she'd forgotten how nice it felt to walk among so many amazing clothes, what it was like to run her card through the machine and declare that she was going to take it all.

And it was even better this time, because it was her and her three best friends, for Bella was there too, which wasn't too often. She could tell that Rosalie was happy that she was there as well; that they were finally doing this, even if she didn't say it aloud. Rosalie never said these things aloud, so Alice had gotten quite good at catching on through her facial expressions.

They looked at their regular every-day clothes first which took a lot of time, but Bella was most anxious to find a new dress, Alice could tell. So after that, she thought that that was the best way to go, and the four of them headed in the direction of Rosalie's favourite dress shop in the mall.

Now, Alice hadn't been there before, but Rosalie and Renesmee had gone shopping a few times since they came back to Forks, so they'd talked wonders about the place. Alice hadn't been totally sure, but when she stepped inside, she had to agree with them. It was such a huge shop, and there was dresses _everywhere_. Long dresses, short dresses, fancy dresses, less fancier dresses, they were in every colour of the rainbow and more, and Alice thought that she was in wonderland.

She released her hold on Renesmee and ran to the closest one she could find. She started to search through everything to find one in her size, but stopped when she heard someone laugh behind her. She turned around with a suspicious look in her eyes, only to see Bella giggling to herself.

"What?" Alice mumbled.

Bella shot her a sneaky grin, "Nothing, it's nothing..." she giggled again, "It's just... it's nice to see that you haven't changed at all, that you're back to being Alice."

She turned back around again and decided not to comment on it. She wasn't sure if that was supposed to be a compliment or not, but Bella was smiling, so she took it as one.

It didn't take more than thirty minutes before they were huddled in the sofas outside the changing rooms, getting ready to try on the gazillion dresses they had all picked out. They were hanging from every possible place and the shop workers were tripping around them, half worried if something might happen to one of them, half happy that they knew that they were going to sell at least four dresses in the next hour or so.

Rosalie was trying on her dresses first, but Alice dared not to give her opinion, because she knew that her feisty sister was going to go with the one she liked best anyway. No use picking another one, then. Renesmee was still looking around a little bit, trying to see if she'd forgotten anything, and Alice and Bella were squeezed together on one couch, their shoulders brushing mercilessly.

"I'm really glad that you decided to come today." Bella told her, turning her head slightly to the side, so she'd lock their eyes, and once more, Alice got that feeling in her body. "It's nice to see how everything is almost back to the way that it was before, that we can actually make it work and be happy."

Alice had been thinking a lot about exactly that herself, and she had to agree with Bella. She wasn't sure if Bella had done this with Edward, but Alice knew that she'd had closure with Jasper; after looking at the pictures he'd taken and sorting through his things, she finally felt like it was over between them, that he could be in the past peacefully, and just look after her when something went wrong. She knew he wanted her to be happy and not live like she'd done since his departure. That was why she didn't feel guilty smiling today, why she could sit here and choose dresses to a school dance that she actually wanted to go to.

"I really want to go to the lingerie shop as well." Alice informed Bella just as Rosalie growled form the changing room, probably not happy with her dress, "I need new underwear."

"Why do you need new underwear?" Bella teased her as she wriggled her eyebrows.

Alice couldn't exactly say that she was just making sure to be presentable if something were to happen, so she just nudged Bella in the side and played along, "You never kno-ow!" she sang.

Just then, Rosalie opened the door to the dressing room and stepped outside, "This is it!" she exclaimed and twirled around in her fabulous black dress; it clung to her every curve beautifully and it complimented her every feature. Truly the right choice, Alice was sure of that.

"Alright!" she exclaimed and pushed Bella out of the couch, "Now your turn, Isabella, we wanna see you model those dresses!"

"I already have two in mind, so I think I'm going to go with one of those." Bella told her, before she stepped inside another dressing room, and Rosalie did the same to change out of hers.

Alice sighed heavily and leaned back in the couch, just as Renesmee took a seat next to her. She sighed as well and placed her head on her aunt's shoulder, "Ya tired?" she whispered.

Alice reached over and carefully took her hand into her own, "Nah... it's just weird to be back here. It's nice, don't get me wrong, but it's still a lot to take in."

Renesmee didn't need to say anything; Alice knew that she knew what she was talking about, just by the way that she looked at her. They both turned their heads when Rosalie reappeared with her dress carefully thrown across her arm. She brushed her hair back and offered them both a huge smile, "This is a killer dress. Em's gonna love me in it. Not that he doesn't love me in everything... or nothing for that matter, but yeah, you get the picture."

"Certainly do Rose!" Renesmee mockingly reassured her while Alice nodded her head; there was not a doubt in their minds. Emmett loved Rosalie with everything he had, there was no questioning that. He'd do anything for her, and if she wore sweats he'd love her, if she wore a dress, he'd love her. And also if she wore – as she put it herself – nothing. He'd definitely love her.

Rosalie winked at them and took a seat too, just as Bella's voice was heard through the fragile wood of the door to her dressing room, "OK guys," she announced, "this is one of the two I liked. I think this is good."

"Then come on out so we can see you, Mom!" Renesmee laughed, and Alice giggled with her.

Bella whined at them. "Stop mocking me, I'm coming out!" she said, and pushed the door open, and it took a second for Alice to realize that it was actually Bella standing there, because she looked so different; usually she would wear jeans and a plain shirt or t-shirt, it did happen on occasion that Alice would see her in something different. It hadn't happened lately because none of them had felt like dressing up. But the shock was evident, and right that second, she knew why she'd had the vision she'd had.

She was _attracted_ to Bella.

And as realization hit her right in the face, Alice knew that that vision was going to come true, it didn't matter when, or if it would be exactly like she'd seen it, because it was going to happen, even if it changed a little bit. Her and Bella were going to get together, and when that happened, she was going to wait for Bella to be ready to pop the question. The only thing that still was a problem was if whether or not she should do something about it herself, or wait to see if it would happen on its own.

Alice zonked right back into her own world when Bella cleared her throat, "Alice?" she questioned, and did a funny little twirl, "What do you think? Rose thinks I should just go ahead and take this one."

"But I think she should try the other one on as well." Renesmee added and tried to charm her way in with her smile.

Alice stared at them for a second or two without really knowing what to say to that, until she decided that she better answer, "The other one too! Try the other one too!" she quickly said and pushed Bella into the dressing room again. "If you try the other one on too, you're gonna know for sure if this is the dress."

Renesmee snapped her fingers, "Good thinkin' aunt Alice!" and Rosalie scolded and took a seat, "Fine, be that way!" she mumbled and crossed her legs.

Bella closed the door to her dressing room again, "Yeah, it's better to be sure than to regret it." she mumbled in her usual common sense sort of way. There was a beat, and then she whined, "Arh, stupid dress! The zipper is stuck, I need help!"

Renesmee and Alice looked at each other, and usually Alice would be quick to bounce in there and get that zipper down, but for some reason, she really didn't feel like seeing Bella without that dress on... not with uh, recent developments. Per say.

"Not me!" Renesmee quickly called it, and Rosalie was not one to help someone with something like that, so Alice took in a deep breath and stepped inside; there was no way she was going to say no to Bella. Firstly because she simply didn't want to, and secondly because she didn't want Bella to know that something was different between them.

Bella smiled at her in the mirror when she entered, "Alice, thank God, can you get the zipper down?"

Alice nodded at her through the mirror and tip-toed up to get the zipper. She was a bit hesitant when she placed a hand on Bella's bare shoulder to support herself, and the contact immediately lit something inside her, like she feared it would; she was certain now. She really was attracted to Bella, and it was meant to be the two of them.

"...Alice?"

She snapped out of it once more when Bella urged her on, and quickly tried to pull the zipper down. She saw, though, why Bella hadn't been able to unzip the dress herself because it had caught onto the material of the dress. "Oh, this is really stuck." she mumbled and fidgeted a little more with it, before she was able to pull it down. "...there you go."

Bella shot her the smile she'd always loved so much and immediately pulled the dress down again and let it fall to her feet. Alice felt her eyes go wide when suddenly Bella was standing in front of her in only her red lace underwear, and quickly turned her head away. Only a second after she had done that, she realized how that would look to Bella, and therefore covered her actions by pretending to dust off her clothes. When she looked up again, Bella was still looking at her through the full-length mirror.

"I think you're right." she said, "New underwear is a good idea."

Alice looked up at her again, and couldn't help but let her eyes linger at the valley between Bella's breasts for a second too long. She simply couldn't handle it, not after the vision she had had and the conclusion she'd taken based upon that vision.

"I'll go try my dresses on too." Alice whispered, before she stepped outside and let the door fall close behind her.

-

No matter where she went and what she did the next few days, Alice seemed to run into Bella. And every time she did so, she'd always notice things about her. Things she already knew and acknowledged, but hadn't really thought much about. She'd always known that Bella was beautiful, perhaps the most beautiful girl she'd ever met, she'd always thought that about her, but she'd never viewed her the way she did now. She thought that everything about her was sexy, and she felt herself wanting her more than she would have imagined. It had never been this way with Jasper, and it was an entirely new feeling, and it made her feel awkward, also because it happened when everyone was present and it was getting sort of difficult to hide it.

All these things that were happening...

Bella smiling more secretly at her, Renesmee winking knowingly at her... the feelings inside her chest, the stares, the caresses, the pauses when they met on top of the staircase and had to pass each other. People were seeing, people were noticing, and Alice was sure that someone was going to make a comment soon.

And so she had come to the conclusion that it was probably best to do something about it. She wasn't sure how she was going to do it yet – if she was going to talk to Bella about it or simply waltz on up there and kiss her. None of those options seemed rather appealing to Alice, so she went back to the idea she'd gotten a few days ago.

Esme was the answer. Esme she could talk to – about anything and everything, and even nothing. She was sure she wouldn't even have to explain it too much, because their mother would probably have noticed a change in them. So it was just to go down in the kitchen once she was alone, and just... talk.

She had always been able to help her in the past, so Alice saw no reason why that shouldn't apply now. And actually – now was the exact word, because Carlisle was working in his office and the rest of her dear family had gone either home or out hunting. They'd have plenty of time, and Alice smiled to herself when she danced down the stairs and realized that things always worked out perfectly for her in the end.

With a grace that'd make any ballerina jealous, Alice stopped in front of Esme, who was sitting on one of their barstools, reading the local newspaper. Not that anything interesting had happened in Forks and nearby, but it was always nice to be sure, as she liked to put it.

The beautiful vampire looked up when she saw one of her kids come to a halt right there. She had a familiar smile on her face, and pushed an auburn piece of hair behind her ear, before she closed the paper and sat up straight. "Alice?" she questioned, her voice carrying itself throughout their marble kitchen.

Alice smiled at her and easily jumped onto the counter, even though it was almost taller than her. "I was wondering if I could talk to you." she stated. And she could tell that Esme had been expecting this, because she had that twinkle in her eye; that caring, loving twinkle, that showed she'd always help, and_ always _be there.

"You can always talk to me." Esme replied.

Alice had thought a lot about whether or not she was going to tell Esme about these thoughts of hers, but she'd never actually thought about how to tell her... if she _did _decide to do so. And now there she was – all ready to talk, but how would she begin?

"Uh..."

Esme immediately bobbled with laughter. "You don't need to say anything." she reassured her with her head tilted slightly to the side as she watched her, "I've noticed some things, and I think I know what you're going to say."

Alice didn't reply; she wasn't sure if she was supposed to, if Esme expected an answer or not.

"It's about Bella, isn't it?"

A dust of wind swept through the open window and blew her fringe back, and Alice stared outside, half expecting Bella to stand there, listening in. It was a cold day, but the rain wasn't falling in heavy drops like usually; it was only making thrumming sounds on their windows and the roof, and it was comforting, as the two vampires sat there, ready to share something special.

Alice sighed heavily and locked her eyes firmly to Esme's. How come she'd ever thought Esme wouldn't know? She noticed these things. She was the essence of love and romance, and she wouldn't have known? Alice should have realized that, and maybe she could have had this conversation a while ago. "Yeah." she confirmed with a short head poke, "It's Bella."

Alice didn't really know what she had expected Esme's reaction to be like because it had never really crossed her mind, but she knew for sure that she hadn't expected what she got. Esme's face lit up and out came the funniest squeal Alice had ever heard escape her lips. Esme wasn't really a squealer so that in itself was huge, but this particular sort of squeal made it even bigger. Esme wrapped her arms around Alice's thin waist and hugged her tight.

"I knew it, I knew it, I knew it!" she sang and buried her nose in Alice's sweater.

Alice patted her lamely on the back, not knowing what to reply to that either, so when Esme finally pulled away, she just stared at her mother, hoping she'd say something.

Esme smiled warmly at her and started talking, "I know this is going to sound _so_ strange," she softly begun, "but I've seen something between you two since day one. I know you weren't aware of it. You had Jasper, and Bella was totally devoted to Edward, but after what happened to them... it was only a matter of time before one of you were going to realize it, I could feel it."

Alice was only quiet as Esme was telling her this.

"First I was a little hesitant about it because of Edward and Jasper, but then I realized... they'd want this too. Out of anyone on this entire planet, I know Edward would have wanted you to be with Bella; he'd trust you to take good care of her.... And I know – I _know_ – that Jasper understood Bella too, that he could see why you'd fall for her this second time around, because they're more alike than one really thinks."

Alice smiled at her. Happy that she wasn't the only one who could see the resemblance between Bella and Jasper. They were both quiet and thoughtful, and those were two things Alice treasured a lot in a partner, and a friend – anyone in general.

Esme reached a hand out and gently cupped Alice's chin, still that motherly smile on her face, "So what makes you come to me now? Did you see something or did something happen between the two of you?"

Alice blinked at her as the wind picked up outside, "I – I had a... vision." she begun, softly, because she knew they had the time, "Actually... I wasn't really sure what to do, because, because I thought that maybe, possibly – I could be into girls, because of... Helena."

Esme nodded softly and let her hand drop to the counter.

"But I realized that I wasn't really into Helena, but that I liked the idea of another woman."

Esme nodded again, "I can understand that. It's probably easier for you... after Jasper."

Alice nodded too. "So I just bounced the idea around with myself, and suddenly one day, I just zonked right out of a vision where I saw Bella asking me to marry her."

Esme's eyes went wide, but then she started chuckling. "Must've shocked you, I presume."

Alice shrugged her shoulders. There was no use not telling Esme what that vision had made her feel. She knew she could talk to her about anything, and it would probably make her feel better to get it out. Plus, it was nice and comfortable to sit in the kitchen with her and talk about important things, while the wind was whining outside as the raindrops fell to the ground in softer and softer cascades. "I wasn't really that shocked to be honest... the immediate feeling was rather... intriguing."

"Well that sounds good to me Alice, it seems like you might just have to wait and see what happens, just... let it happen in its own pace."

Alice swallowed loudly. "However, there's just one thing I'm not sure of..."

Esme reached for her hand again and squeezed it tight. "What is it, Alice? You can talk to me."

"It's just – me and Bella?" she raised an eyebrow in question. "What won't people say, what won't people think? Even the ones who doesn't know that we were sisters-in-law, they're still going to question us because we're both female."

"Hey," Esme said to her, voice spot on and soft as she gave her fingers another squeeze, "listen to me. This is something I taught Edward a very long time ago, right when he was falling in love with Bella. You were right there next to us, on the piano bench, and he was working on his music, and I told him in my thoughts "_love doesn't always come in convenient packages_" and the same goes for you now Alice – it's not gonna be the easiest way for the two of you, but perhaps it's the right one."

And with those words, Esme pushed her chair back and left the kitchen – and Alice – in complete silence. Outside, the sun was slowly breaking through the rainy clouds for the first time in days, leaving the grass misty with dew, as four vampires jumped across the river and landed on the other side.

* * *

_I know this update must be disappointedly short after the unbelievably long wait I've pestered you with, and I'm so sorry. And like those many waits before, I have a good excuse (though this one, I believe, must take the cake :b); my mother got hospitalized again last week, and I've had to battle extremely horrible school hours with grocery shopping, cooking, cleaning, doing the laundry, homework, and helping my sister with her things too, so I really, like seriously, haven't had time to write. I probably won't have time again too soon, but I'll do my best to try – you guys deserve quick updates. _

_So anyway. Part from all my lame excuses, did you guys like the chapter? I'm getting closer to the romance, that's for sure, only the few last insecurities to be sorted out. I'll probably get there in a few chapters or so. _

_Thank you so much for the nice reviews, you don't know what the support means to me :) _

_**Disclaimer; **I don't own Twilight. _


	10. Chapter Ten

**Chapter Ten **

"Are you sure that this will work?"

"Yeah, of course, it'll be perfect."

"Really? I just don't know if I'm comfortable with it."

"You just need to get used to it, no worries."

"But what if it doesn't feel good?"

"It'll feel good, I _promise _you!"

"..."

"If you just let me try this, then I know you'll feel better than ever. Just give me a shot, and it'll be the best thing you _ever_ tried."

Jane let her hands drop from her head and stared at Alice through the mirror, "I'm just worried... it's my _hair_, Alice!"

Alice gave her a stern look and quickly pulled the ponytail holder out of Jane's plain hair, which led it drop to her shoulders. "Don't you trust me, Jane?"

She didn't answer.

"I'm good at these things, I cut Rose's hair, I cut Bella's and Nessie's, I know how to cut me some hair!" Alice objected and started combing her hands through Jane's hair; their discussion was getting practically nowhere, and Alice really didn't see the problem. She'd gone with Jane home so she could cut her hair, and now suddenly she had second thoughts. It was like the human didn't trust her or something.

Hello? She was greatly _trustable_.

Jane seemed to ponder about that for a few seconds, her face screwed up in thought, "Rosalie does have pretty hair..." she trailed off.

Alice smirked at her again and bent down to get out her scissors, her combs and her spray bottle of water. She placed it all on the counter in front of the mirror and started smoothing Jane's hair out with the help of water, fingers and special scissors. "Yes, and I know how to make it different layers. It's gonna be awesome, trust me on this."

Jane seemed to hesitate still, but she gave Alice a determined smile. "Let's do this."

Alice smiled at her reassuringly and immediately went to work; Jane didn't speak much as she started cutting and combing. She was reading in one of her scientific books, which was OK with Alice, because then she had some time to think about things as she worked.

It was so weird. After her talk with Esme, Alice had been feeling much more happy and certain about things. She was sure that her and Bella as a couple would be the best way to go. She could picture them together, years and years into the future, happy and in love. She could imagine their wedding, with Rosalie on the piano, Carlisle giving her away, and Bella waiting by the alter with Esme and Renesmee. She could picture it all, and she knew that it was going to happen.

The only thing that bummed her out now was actually just the fact that she didn't know _when_ it was going to happen. After seeing and imagining all these things, Alice just couldn't wait to get started on the next part of her life. She wanted to have with Bella now what she knew she'd have later. She was impatient, she was hopping, she couldn't … wait.

That was why she'd come to the conclusion that she should probably just go ahead, jump into it, and maybe just – kiss her?

Alice bit her lip gently and blew at Jane's neck so all the small pieces of hair would disappear. She played with the rest of it a bit and decided that this was pretty. She turned Jane around in the stool. "And now I need you to look up at me, because I wanna give you these amazing bangs."

Jane's eyes widened for a second, but she said nothing and just closed her book with a light smack.

Alice leaned forward and carefully cut Jane's fringe right above her eyebrows. She loved this look, and she was certain that it'd look amazing on Jane; her face had just the right shape. "Helena's gonna love this..." she whispered, just as she cut the last piece. She reached her fingers out and gently tossed the hair so it looked much more natural. She stood up then again and turned Jane back around, "There you go."

Jane's face immediately lit up in surprise, and Alice could tell that it was positive; that she hadn't expected it to be this great. Alice felt rather proud of this as well, because Jane's hair before had been so boring and plain, and now she just looked awesome and hot. "Thank you _so_ much, Alice!" Jane told her and locked their eyes through the mirror.

Alice smiled and leaned herself against the counter, "You just need to buy something to hold it in place. You should probably drive to Port Angeles and get some help there; the professionals know more about it than I do."

"I'll do that!" Jane smiled and reached a hand up to brush her fingers through the newly cut hair again. Alice could tell that she was _very_ happy.

Letting out a sigh, Alice started to gather her things. "I better get home now, though."

Jane hopped out of the chair and started to help her with her stuff. "You want me to drive you? Your siblings probably drove home right after school, right?"

Alice offered her a thankful smile; happy that at least someone was still kind in this world. It wasn't too often that that happened. "Thank you for the offer, but I'll catch a ride with my Dad, I'll just walk to the hospital." she quickly lied, knowing that as soon as she was out of sight, she'd enter to forest and be home within minutes.

Jane was still smiling when she answered, "Alright... if you're sure."

"I am." Alice said, and with a funny wave, she turned on her heel, left the bathroom, left the house, and went for the forest.

-

When Alice entered the house, she could immediately feel that everything was not as it used to be. The familiar smells of her family (including the reeking of Jacob) was mixed with something different, yet slightly recognizable, and she stopped briefly as the door smacked close behind her.

Someone else was in the house.

She tiptoed slowly through their great entrance hall and peeked into their family room; she wasn't worried that something bad had happened, because then everything wouldn't have seemed so peaceful. She would have known if someone had come to attack her family, she was certain of that. She couldn't help but smile when she realised who it was.

"Alice," Carlisle said and stood up from his seat in his usual chair, "we've all be expecting you. We have company."

Alice stepped fully into the room as the vampires turned their heads to look at her; sitting together in one sofa was their two guests. One of them was Tanya, their friend from the Denali Coven, and the other one was someone Alice wasn't familiar with, but immediately knew who was – it had got to be Maya, their new family member.

Tanya offered her a funny little wave and a very optimistic smile, "Hi Alice."

Alice wasn't quite sure if she was comfortable seeing Tanya again; the last time, their friend had brought horrible news with her, so the tight feeling in her chest was completely justified. "Hello Tanya."

The beautiful vampire stood up and came to take her hand, "I thought we did best in visiting you again. And I wanted to introduce you all to Maya." she gestured towards the even more beautiful vampire in the couch; and once Alice really let her eyes rest on her, she did a double-take.

Maya was extremely pale, paler than even Edward, paler than any other vampire Alice had ever seen. She was pale, but her hair was brown, completely smooth, and it rested gracefully on her thin shoulders. She had the hugest eyes Alice had ever seen and they were such a brown colour, it was almost scary.

"Hi."

And when she spoke, her voice was hoarse and mysterious, and for a second there, Alice completely forgot who she was and why she was standing in this living room. That was, of course, until Emmett elbowed her in the side.

She cleared her throat, "Hi, my name's Alice."

Maya nodded, "They've told me about you."

Tanya had a good grip on Alice's arm, and she pulled her with her to the couch where they both sat down, Alice between Maya and Tanya. The rest of the family, who wasn't already sitting down, took a seat as well.

Bella looked awfully uncomfortable, but she never did like Tanya that much, and Renesmee just glared at her, as if this was all her fault. Alice, herself, was slightly intrigued by the fact that they were now here.

"I'm surprised I didn't see you coming." she commented when the silence between them all was a bit too much to bear.

Esme gave her a supposed-to-be small wink and said, "Well, you've had a lot of other... visions lately, haven't you, Alice?"

Bella looked slightly curious, but Alice just kept her mouth shut.

Maya spoke then, and once more, Alice was completely taken with her voice, "I wanted to come and give my condolences. The transfiguration has been a bit easy for me, but it's still been a hard year after the Volturi found out about me. The years before that were harder too, but it's been OK. I'm just really sorry you had to be pained because of me."

Bella's jaw tightened, and it was Emmett who spoke up. "Jasper and Edward knew what they were getting themselves into with the Volturi. They wanted to come and help."

"We always help each other out," Rosalie butted in, her head resting gently on Emmett's shoulder, "even if it can cause death, we always help. You guys would have done the same for us."

Carlisle smiled at them all, though he looked slightly troubled, "That's the beauty of the friendship between our families, isn't it?"

Tanya nodded, "We believe so. We're just sorry that it had to end like this."

Bella's jaw seemed to tighten a bit more, but she spoke anyway, "Well, so are we. Alice and I lost our husbands, Renesmee lost her father. It hasn't been easy on us."

Tanya didn't know what to respond to that, it seemed, but apparently Maya did, because she spoke, "I can imagine. I, myself, haven't found a mate yet, so it's hard to picture the grief you must feel after all these years, but believe me when I say, I can imagine."

"No." Bella said and stood up from her chair with a sudden abruptness, "I don't think you can."

They could only watch her as she left the living room. Alice had an urge to follow her, to make sure that she was okay, but another urge kept her seated; the urge to get to know Maya better.

Carlisle spoke then, "So how long will you be staying, Tanya?"

"Not for long," the other vampire said, a certain glint in her eye that Alice couldn't read, "we only have a few... _things_ to take care of. We'll leave as soon as they're done."

Carlisle nodded in understanding, "I'd like to have a talk with you, Maya, you see, I take great interest in the different abilities that vampires can develop, I'd like to have a talk with you about yours. Just before you leave."

"Sure, we can do it whenever." Maya replied and offered them all an outstanding smile.

Alice pushed herself out of the couch then, deciding that she had better go check on Bella. She could hear her cursing out in the garden, and she hated to leave her alone with all her troubles. "I'll go make sure Bella is alright." she whispered and made her way through the legs around their small coffee table.

Maya's voice stopped her, "I'll need to speak with you later Alice, if that's OK?"

Alice wasn't really sure why Maya needed to speak with her, but she had no problem whatsoever with it, so she gave a small nod, "Just come get me when you feel like it."

Maya smiled back at her; a cute, slightly insecure smile, and Alice turned and went through the kitchen and into their backyard. It had gotten a lot darker outside since she left Jane's house, but she had no problems locating Bella, who was sitting down by the river, the moonlight casting its reflection onto her pale skin.

Alice was there in two seconds. She sat down next to her, her legs crossed, and placed a comforting hand on her thigh. "It was weird for me too." she murmured, lowering her voice to a minimum, "Seeing them again, I mean, knowing they saw them last."

Bella didn't look at her, "Sometimes I think it's so unfair. Just because of _her_ we- we lost... we lost Edward and Jasper. Because_ she_ needed help."

Alice knew that it wasn't nice to feel that way, but she'd felt like that plenty of times as well. Especially in the beginning, in the beginning she had blamed everyone and herself, and she'd felt so much pain, she had thought she'd never get over it. But she did get over it; time had gone by, and she'd felt better, and she'd decided that it wouldn't bring them back to blame anyone, she'd just give herself more to ponder about, more to regret, and that'd do her no good. "I felt like that too, Bella, I did." she spoke back, and shrugged her shoulders lightly, "But it's no use, it's not going to make you feel better."

Bella turned to look at her then; her eyes were empty and they held a deep pain, "I know that. It's just – I don't think I was ready yet, to see them I mean. I think more time should have passed."

Alice raised an eyebrow, "But it was nice to have closure with them. I feel complete now."

"Complete?" Bella questioned, a sneaky smile coming onto her lips, "Really?"

Alice rolled her eyes at her, "Stop mocking me, you know what I mean!"

Bella laughed for a few seconds, and Alice could tell that it felt really good for her to laugh; that she needed it, so she quickly joined in and laughed as well, because she wanted their good moment to last longer. And as they were there together, laughing, Alice once more realized just how much she loved this woman, just how much she wanted her, and wanted them to have that future together. She almost couldn't stand to wait it out any longer.

As their laughter died, Alice could feel a special moment in the air. Bella was looking at her again, laughter now playing in her eyes instead of the emptiness, and it felt good to be there with her, better than any place else. The brunette reached a hand out and grabbed Alice's tightly.

"I'll always have you, won't I, Alice?" she whispered then, interlacing their fingers, getting more intimate.

"You will." Alice confirmed. And she reached her other hand out and gently cupped Bella's cheek. All she wanted was to lean forward and kiss her, make sure that her dreams did happen, that everything she saw came true. It was all secure she had to hold on to, a hope that she could be really happy in the future. Bella was the key to it all, the reason for her future happiness, and she did not want to pass up on that.

Bella looked lovingly at her and Alice stroked her fingers across her jaw. "Alice..." Bella's voice trailed off into nothing and the sound of the water running was filling their silence.

"Bella, I-" she didn't know what to say, didn't know how to phrase herself to make this okay, all she knew was that she wanted this, and that she was going to do it, "-I really wanna kiss you right now." she finished off, before she backed down and didn't do it.

She could hear Bella's breath hitch in her throat, and she seemed frozen solid. Alice didn't know if she was supposed to do it or not, but she was going to, because the wait was unbearable. While Bella just looked her, her eyes full of questions and confusion, Alice leaned forward, slowly getting closer to her dream; to her future. As she was millimetres away from her lips, she half expected Bella to jump off and leave her hanging, but instead, she felt another pair of lips on hers, and she knew she hadn't moved those last few inches.

It was only there for a good few seconds, Alice knew that. But those few seconds, they were enough for her to know that this could be good, that Bella could be her next mate – a mate that'd last for her entire existence. It was wonderful; the way their lips were pressed together, the way she tasted. Everything was wonderful – right up until Bella had pulled herself away and was out of there before Alice had a chance to say a word.

-

The next day at school during lunch, Alice found herself standing outside in the pouring rain, beneath her newly purchased umbrella, just to be away from the rest of her family. Every time she got close to Bella, a tension would rise and it was not a good feeling. She didn't want the others to experience that, so that was why she'd decided to 'skip' lunch and get some fresh air.

She had no idea what happened between her and Bella. One minute they were kissing and the next Bella wouldn't talk to her. Alice feared that maybe it had all gone too fast for Bella's liking, but they were still going to have to talk about it sometime – there was no use just avoiding each other; that wouldn't lead them to a solution.

She had thought it would be the perfect thing to just kiss Bella and get it over with – that way Bella would know how she felt and there would be no 'I'm in love with you'-talk, at least not until after Bella had reacted to the kiss. But it hadn't really worked out so well.

Alice wondered what she had done wrong for it to end so horribly? Was it her fault, or could she have do it no different?

"Something happened."

Alice almost jumped out of her own skin by the sound of Helena's voice. She hadn't even heard her coming, because between the mix of the rain on her umbrella and the thoughts inside her head, she was pretty much deaf to the world.

"Sorry," Helena mumbled and stepped beneath her umbrella as well, "I didn't mean to scare you."

Alice offered her a small smile, slightly uncomfortable having her so close, standing beneath the same umbrella. But she looked up at her anyway, and decided that they might as well talk. "It's OK." she whispered, and cocking one eyebrow, she added, "What happened?"

Helena nodded her head to the side, through the window and into the filled cafeteria, "Between you and Bella." she flatly commented, "Something finally happened between you and Bella."

Alice didn't know what to reply to that. She couldn't tell if she was most shocked about the fact that Helena had known she liked Bella, or the fact that Helena had known that now something had happened. So Alice just kept quiet.

Helena shifted her weight slightly, "I've known all along. Since you came to school too, I could see it, there was something there. I didn't think you knew." she bit her lip in thought, probably hoping for an answer, but Alice wasn't going to give her one, "I still wanted to be with you though, I couldn't help it. But now I see it was a lost cause. You only want her. I guess it's OK, I mean, you're not really related."

Alice chuckled by the last comment; it was a wonder that Helena commented on this last. Normally these sort of things were very talked about when they happened. "No we're not." she just said.

Helena looked at her through her long black lashes, "It's a shame. I really like you, Alice. You're the most interesting girl around here, the only one I feel I can actually talk to – the rest of the gay girls are just boring."

Alice glanced through the window's glass again, her eyes landing on Jane who was eating lunch with a couple of other girls from their class. How could Helena not see how perfect they would be as a couple? How could she not have noticed how Jane had started to dress up? How could she not see the beauty in her? It was a wonder, and now, Alice decided, she was going to do something about it.

"Maybe you should try opening your eyes a little?" Alice suggested in a light, teasing voice.

Helena looked confused for a second, "What do you mean...?" she trailed off, again shifting slightly on her feet.

Alice glanced inside again for a second and realised that Jane was now watching them. She gave her a short wink and turned back around to Helena; she tiptoed up, to gently whisper in her ear, "The person you're closest to, might very well be the person you're looking for. Try thinking about that when you go back inside and sit down."

And with those words, she let the balls of her heels hit the ground again. She turned back around to go inside, leaving Helena completely in wonder outside in the pouring rain.

-

The weather wasn't very reliable these days. It went from good to bad, and Alice just wished it'd settle for something. Not that the sun ever really shined around here, because that was rarely, but it would either rain or not, and it was much easier when it rained for a few days and then didn't for another few. Like this, with the rain stopping and beginning and stopping again, Alice felt like she was going insane.

Alice found herself sitting outside by the river, around the exact spot where she had kissed Bella a few days ago. She had gone outside when the rain wasn't there, and now it was, but she didn't feel like leaving. She just sat there, completely soaked, but it didn't matter. The rain annoyed her, but it was also comforting, because it fit her mood perfectly.

She turned her head around when she heard someone approaching her. She hoped in vain that it would be Bella coming to talk to her, but of course it wasn't – it was Maya, the beautiful Denali vampire. They were leaving the next day, and Alice had barely had time to get to know her, except she did know that she liked her and that she was the sweetest thing. She hoped they'd get to see more of each other.

"Mind if I have a seat?" Maya asked and pointed vaguely at the grass next to Alice.

Alice smiled warmly at her, happy to have someone to talk to, someone who didn't know about this drama, who was just there. "Go right ahead."

Maya smiled back and sat down next to her, letting her feet drop into the ice-cold water running beneath them. "We never really got to talk much." she commented, her long brown hair blowing back in the light breeze.

Alice let their shoulders brush, "I know, I've been... caught up in things. Did your talk with Carlisle go well? I hear you have amazing powers."

Maya had a glint in her eye, "I hear the same thing about you. Premonitions, right?"

Alice never did like to talk too much about herself, but it was nice to talk about something different, so she decided to go with it. "Yeah – I, I see the future, sort of." she nodded her head, "I mean, it's not certain or anything, because the future can change, but often enough my visions come true."

"You saw the Volturi coming for me, didn't you?"

Their eyes locked and Alice nodded shortly, "I did. I figured I better tell Carlisle, he has always known what to do, and he did what was best."

Maya bit her lip in thought, "I'm glad you told him. We wouldn't have coped without Edward and Jasper, we wouldn't have stood a chance. They gave up everything to help us, everything."

"I know." Alice paused and turned her head back around, staring and the forest in front of her, "That's how they were. Very helpful people. Jasper did everything, always, for me. To help me."

"You miss him a lot , don't you?" Maya whispered back, her voice kind and curious at the same time.

Alice nodded. "He was my world. But now – my world's someone else. That's life I guess, these things change."

Maya glanced softly at her once more, "I'm pretty new at this... vampire-thing, but – vampires never fall out of love, do they?"

"It does happen that vampires grow apart." Alice told her, happy to share what she knew with this young vampire, because all was important. "But mostly they split when someone is destroyed. It's sad, but it's the truth."

"That sad truth." Maya agreed.

Alice bumped their shoulders again, "You'll find a mate soon enough. Just enjoy life as a vampire until then."

Maya was quiet for a few seconds, and Alice couldn't really understand why; she seemed... shy about things. The way she was fidgeting with her fingers, the way she kept brushing back her hair. It was... weird.

"Hey." Alice mumbled, tried bumping their shoulders once more.

Maya looked up at her then, her huge brown eyes, browner and more golden than any other vampire's, locking firmly on Alice. "That's also why I wanted to come here." she mumbled, still seeming rather shy even if she spoke, "I saw a picture of you, and I – I told Tanya that I really wanted to meet you, you see – I'm – I'm a lesbian, was as a human too."

She paused and Alice just stared at her, not knowing what to say. She was flattered, of course, but there was still so many unanswered questions.

Maya continued, "We wanted to wait until you had had a chance to get over your husband until we came here," she murmured, "but we still didn't want to have you fall for someone else before I got a chance to get to know you. I see now though, that we were already too late."

Alice closed her eyes for a second and let her head fall into her hands. This – this was too much to handle for her right now. Why were so many people interested in her, but not the one she really wanted? She rubbed her eyes before she opened them again. "Yeah..." she mumbled, "Thank you though."

"Bella will come around." Maya promised and placed a gentle arm around her shoulders, hugging her close.

Letting out a huge sigh, Alice asked, "How do you know that?"

"I just do." Maya promised, and then she hugged her fully, rubbing her back in a kind manner. Alice savoured the moment as she breathed in the strong scent of Maya, and she knew that hadn't she loved Bella so damn much already, she and Maya would have been a good couple. There would have been nothing odd about that. But she wasn't going to give up on Bella now, she was in too deep already.

A throat was cleared behind them, and the two vampires broke apart, only to find Bella standing there, in a pink raincoat, nervously tripping on her feet. "I was wondering if I could talk to you... Alice?" she whispered, and Alice could tell that she felt completely awkward.

Maya winked at her quickly, "I'll be leaving then." she said, and got onto her feet, quickly making her way into the house again. Bella took a seat where she'd just been seated and turned to look at Alice with a serious expression on her face.

"Do you want to know something?" she questioned.

Alice wanted to know a lot of things, so of course she nodded. However, she was still confused as to why Bella was there now, because they hadn't spoken for some time. It felt good though, having her close again. She just hoped it'd last, that maybe they'd figure things out now. "Sure." she added and gave Bella an expectant look.

"That hurt." Bella shortly said and gestured behind her, where Maya had descented. "That really fucking hurt. I had no idea it would, but it really did."

Alice hadn't any idea whatsoever about what to do with this information. She shrugged her shoulders.

Bella continued to speak, "I was passing through the kitchen and happened to be looking outside, and there you were, hugging her. And it really hurt me."

"I'm sorry," Alice said, still very much confused as to what was happening between them right now. Not that she wasn't thrilled to know that it annoyed Bella to see her with Maya, but she wasn't about to get her hopes up if nothing were to happen, "I don't know what to say to that Bella."

Bella grabbed her hand tightly in hers and Alice let her. "I had no idea I felt this way about you, I had no idea when you planted one on me, and then I just didn't know how to react. I thought it was – wrong." she spoke so quickly, so passionately, and Alice could feel her hope raising anyway, because this promised for something good. "But then I realised, why should it be wrong, and you – you've known this for a while, haven't you? You've seen it coming."

Alice let out a deep breath and decided that it was probably a good idea to speak now. "I'm sorry Bella, I didn't really know what to do. I saw us in the future, together." she spoke, deliberately not mentioning the marriage-part because that would be a bit too much at the moment, "First I didn't really know what to think about it, but the idea... was rather appealing, I mean – you've always been my best friend, I love you so much." she lifted her hand and gently cupped Bella's cheek as she usually did, "Then I started noticing small things and I realised – it could be really good."

"Alice..." Bella trailed off, placing a hand upon Alice's which was still on her cheek, "A bit of warning would have been nice, y'know?"

Alice couldn't help but giggle.

"I wanna try this though." Bella said, cutting her giggle short completely, "I think this could be really good, and there's no one I trust more than you. I really want to try."

Alice couldn't help but smile, "You do?"

Bella smirked "I do."

And just as she leaned forward to kiss her, the rain stopped.

* * *

_Ta-daah :) what do you say? Did you like it, hate it, not care for it? I'm really sorry about the loooong delay once more, but I'm not gonna bother with the excuses, because they're the same as usual. I really hoped that you liked how things ended with this. I'm usually like this when I write love stories. I tend to end it just as the couple get together, I'm not much for continuing once they figure things out, because that's just boring stuff. It's the journey that counts – at least to me. _

_I want to thank everyone for reading this story and for supporting me with comments, ideas and reviews – I couldn't have done it without you (: I hope to write more Twilight at some point, but I don't know what's next for me. I'm thinking I'll be writing some Disney again, I've been told my stories are missed there (; _

_Anyway. Please drop me off one last comment, I'd love to hear from you! _

_Stessa._

_**Disclaimer; **I do not own Twilight. _


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